My wife’s and I meeting with two elders. Their true colors shine through…

by Winston Smith :>D 97 Replies latest jw experiences

  • waiting
  • blondie
    blondie

    Winston, I was so proud how you stood by your wife. Elders like that will make mental illness worse. I always ask them where they got their license and that I will report them for practicing without a license.

    May things go well in finding help for your wife. I will be thinking of her and you.

    Blondie

  • core
    core

    Winston

    Brilliant work and support for your wife. Your support is vital to her and I would only just add to the wise words already posted that you need to make sure you are receivng all the help and assistance YOU need as it is vital that you are there for your wife. I am sorry for not knowing what you can do except that I can see the danger of you being driven down by the constant stress and pressure - if any real help is there take it - if you can talk to someone do so... you have taken charge of the situation and I would only add KEEP IN CONTROL - keep the plumber, the baker and the candlestick maker out of your way and do things your way.

    So many hearts and minds are with you in this...... Keep Control, keep the dubs at bay, seek whatever help you can...

    If you were my son I would be so proud of you!

  • Zoewrex
    Zoewrex

    Winston - Please go with your wife to the Bible Studies and Meetings. I'm on meds and I get depressed when I leave the KH or a Bible Study AND I'm not even a JW! I can't even imagine her emotional turmoil with the cong., elders meeting, the Watchtower reading she may have forgotten to do and oh by the way since her husband no longer believes she'll be in Paradise alone.... (Please note the s arcasm here) Anyhow the point is you don't know what 'they're' saying without you there and even though you question the Dates, if you don't attend that will give them more reason to 'talk'.

    I've read all the posts and completely agree the two of you need to see someone (not recommended by a JW friend) immediately. Medication is not a cure all, but it does even out the high's and low's and helps you to think a bit more clear. I've been on & off for 5 years now and am on EffexorXR. I started with St. Johns Wort (and self medicated with wine & beer) went to Prozac and settled for Effexor after the baby. The Dr.'s aren't going to 'fix' the problems, they just equipt you with the tools to do it yourself. You and your wife are in for a long and bumpy ride, we're all just back seat drivers.

    You're doing a great job! Visit Smiley Central!


  • Winston Smith :>D
    Winston Smith :>D

    Ravyn ,

    Thx for the heads up. I have read something similar on a bi-polar site, so I guess with you observing such a terrible event; I will really take this info seriously.

    I wish I could get her away from the meetings and the WTS, but she wouldn’t have any of that right now. She did say that she wants to leave our book study, so I will arrange that. I also am going to go to all of the meetings with her [as much as I hate them] just to watch over her and make sure nobody pulls her aside to say anything dangerous to her.

    I realize that much of the info from the platform is dangerous anyways, but at least with me there I can deprogram her on the way home.

    JT, yup, that’s the line of reasoning the elders were putting my wife through. Morons.

    waiting, I saw your post. Thanks for covering my back ;P

    blondie, thx for the kind words.

    @ core;

    Father, is that you?

    Seriously, thx for the advice. I have felt drained and like I was going crazy in the past by this, but now I feel strengthened by all of your support. Everyone’s thoughts, insights, prayers, hugs and warm fuzzies are very helpful and strengthening.

    Again, thx everyone. Your words here are assisting me in deciding what is best for her, and I have altered the way I view some things, like going to the meetings, for now.

    Winston.

  • Winston Smith :>D
    Winston Smith :>D

    Please go with your wife to the Bible Studies and Meetings

    Zoewrex

    Thank you, that does seem to be a good idea the more others discuss it and the more I think about the pros vs. cons of my meeting attendence.

    Winston.

  • heathen
    heathen

    winston---------- If it were my wife I would probly start swinging at em . There is no friggen way I would insist my wife do the door to door work period ,in fact I would demand that they don't permit women to do it . There is a whole bunch of scripture to support my beliefs and I know damn well they have nothing on this .They have for a long time inserted stuff in their literature that is an out right lie .

  • Zoewrex
    Zoewrex

    Winston - I don't envy you and the decissions you have to make for you and your wife. Just keep loving her the way you have and watch your back at the meetings.

    Prayers, hugs and warm fuzzies to all who don't feel as if they have it in them to leave just yet.

  • waiting
    waiting

    My dearest Winston,

    Sometimes my humor can be inappropriately timed - or so I've been told. And I didn't want you to think that of me.....at least, not yet.

    But I'm glad I caught your humor too. Sometimes it's so lonely being the Only Inappropriate One.

    I think you've been given a lot of good advice to ponder upon. You're doing a great job.

    waiting

  • oldcrowwoman
    oldcrowwoman

    Winston and Mrs winston

    I want to say I am proud of you and your wife. And to go through the horrors of that meeting. Makes me angry to put your wife and you through all this and not acknowledge feelings at all. Having a life on the line and to ignor the situation. Is beyond me??

    I am not surprised by there response to you and her. They have no idea what to do in social or mental health issues. But a robotic response from a book to handle these kind of situation.

    Being blindsighted I admire your skills being clear with them and keeping them accountable as to what needed to be addressed by them.

    Its a hard row to hoe with mental issues. You recognize its the diease and not the person. I admire your caring and compassion Winston. Glad you are here. That your wife knows that you stand behind her. Is a huge piece in the relationship.

    OCW

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