My wife’s and I meeting with two elders. Their true colors shine through…

by Winston Smith :>D 97 Replies latest jw experiences


    Oh dear Winston and emotionally draining for both of you.

    I'm not going to waste one moment mentioning those idiotic men or the borg.

    I just wanted to say thank you for sharing your experience with us. I feel your pain and fear, I have lost someone to suicide.

    But you and your wife have so much love. Your words to her are loving, kind, encouraging, positive and combining your love with professional help, things will work out. The less those ignorant, controlling, unloving men interfer, the better!

    I wish you and your wife happinness, peace and health.

    Cheers, Bliss. (-:

  • Satanus


    You handled that really well!

    Repeating the mantra 'do more' to a severely depressed person is like going into a hospital to set up calisthenics, sports, sprinting etc programs for incapacitated ones. Ones w cancer, broken bones, pneumonia etc. Monty python did a skit on this once.


  • Soledad

    winston thanks for sharing. you are a wonderful husband. my thoughts are with you and with your wife. I hope she recovers

    sabine that was awful. I'm so sorry.

  • Amazing

    Winston: Excellent !!! Bravo !!! You handled this very well ... though I am very sorry that your wife had to be there and go through with this ...

    My wife, likewise, suffers from clinical depression, and spent over 600 days in the hospital ... made two suicide attempts ... and the last thing she needed was to feel that she was not doing enough ...

    I also had some similar experiences with the Elders ... some I have yet to document here on JWD.

    If you want to talk and compare notes, feel free to call me at 847-952-0909 ... ask for Jim Whitney.

    Again, thanks for relating this account to us ... what you went through is all too typical of the lunacy of the untrained, unqualified, brain-dead Watchtower Elders ... again, my respect to you for how you handled this situation and standing by your wife ... Jim W.

  • garybuss

    When I am with a person who says they are contemplating suicide, I ask them if they will willingly go into the hospital. If they say yes, I take them that minute. If they say no, I walk to the phone and call 911 that minute.

    If you are unsure how to proceed, call the mental health unit of your local hospital day or night and tell them the circumstances. They will tell you how to proceed.

    Always error on the safe side. Never consider money or feelings or other's opinions. GaryB

  • rocketman
    I’m just giving Bible counsel here brother.”

    They are there simply to recite what they think is helpful information. Their "do more" solution, as you well know, is typical jw-speak because that's all they know. These guys are horrnedously unqualified, especially in the case of trying to help someone who is depressed.

  • DannyBear


    ****They are there simply to recite what they think is helpful information. Their "do more" solution, as you well know, is typical jw-speak because that's all they know.****

    It is the this very fact that gives each elder the personal justification for their actions.

    They are absolved from any personal responsibility, they are simply following the 'societies' instructions. Never mind if the advice fits the circumstance, it is the approved message, the latest understanding, so lovingly provided from 'the mother organization'.......PUKE big time.

    That is why JT's analogy of 'cheese and cracker men' fit so well. They are simply just like part time grocery store sample hawker's, who have been hired to sell the 'cheese'. The 'cheese' will fix any problem just eat more of sister sad and depressed, have another 'cheese', you know it will make you feel better.

    LIke good hired hands they complete their assigned tasks, walking away from every encounter saying to well they performed their job.

    They set up their little 'sample stands' and give out the same crappy cheese, no matter the issue or dietary needs of their customer's (victims).

    Why do I know this is true..........I was one of the 'cheese and cracker' men. And didn't see how BAD my cheese really smelled!!!

    No more cheese please.


  • heathen

    Winston --- I applaud the way you deffended your wife in front of those two dick heads. I suppose next time you can show them the scripture where the apostle paul says that women would be saved by faith, child bearing and sanctification and not from performing more duties in the congregation . The wife IMO according to the bible is there for your needs .

  • m0nk3y

    My thoughts are with both of you. You are a VERY good husband Winston Smith. You obviously care for your wife a great deal.

    Having suffered from clinical severe depression myself I can say that your wife, the woman you fell in love with is there, just under the surface .. struggling with the torment of feelings and numbness this desease inflicts. I am sure with professional help she will come out of this a much stronger person for it. I can say this because I did.

    This experience with the Elder brought tears to my eyes, for men that are suppose to show great love and understanding of the sheep .. they didn't show it at all. But you on the other hand showed them up, with the great and deep love you have for your wife, the amount of hurt you would have felt under this situation must have been overwhelming for you.

    When you are coming out of depression it almost feels as if the world around you is a bit lighter .. less cloudy .. and then you start to sink down in the cycle again .. this happens from time to time during recovery from it .. but the more time goes on .. the less deeper you go down, until you reach the point where you feel lifes problems are managable .. and the only thing keeping you in bed in the morning is cold floor

    I wish much streghth for your wife in her recovery and a little for you as well. Perhaps when she is alot better she will realise just how rediculous the whole WTS doctrines are and move on.



  • nowisee

    dear winston,

    thank you for your story. you have handled yourself so well, and i am sure that the love that you and your wife obviously have for each other will carry you through.... neither one of you wants to lose the other.

    my prayers are with you. do go for therapy. my sibling asked for therapy the night before the suicide,... it was too late. later on, thankfully, therapy helped me tremendously.

    elsewhere, i am worried about you too....

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