smiddy said: If its not to painful to speak about this Heaven i,we , would love to
know more about the situations you found yourself in with your dad and
your cousin , and how this panned out.
Hey smiddy... I don't mind sharing. I could probably write a book but will try to keep it fairly short. Hahaha.
On the whole, my Witness family, outside of my parents, have been pretty good people. My folks went through a period of being fairly mean to us in the '90s which damaged our family. The Borg's 'kick your unbelieving family to the curb' belief is largely responsible for this.
In his email my cousin said they always think fondly of my Dad and our family. I am not sure if they would think fondly of us all now. We aren't JWs and don't ever plan to be. My bro lives common law with his girlfriend. My niece (she is an Industrial Electrician) lives common law with her boyfriend and pole dances for recreation. I'm sure that wouldn't go over well. And I love pagan stuff... witches, dragons, fairies, crystals, candles, nature, herbs, etc, etc. I'd rather have pagan memorabilia in my house than religious items any day. (I am a Secular Humanist but I love the romance and beauty of pagan, shamanistic, fantasy things). My Dad is truly mentally ill, suffering from dementia.
I am not that young anymore - there is more than 50 years of JW history in my family. With my cousins, things go back to before my one cousin's death. In the early '90s I believe (maybe even before that), their Father (my Uncle and my Mom's brother) was DF'ed. No one has told me the reason but I suspect it was due to a disagreement with some sort of doctrine. I'd have to look back at that time to see what flip-flop(s) was/were going on. I'm pretty sure his DFing was before the change in the 'this generation' teaching in the mid '90s. He did get re-instated, particularly after the elders who DF'ed him were subsequently DF'ed themselves. He has since passed away.
At any rate, my Uncle's daughter, died some time after he was DF'ed. She refused a blood transfusion after being in a very bad car accident. She was t-boned in an intersection waiting to turn left on a green light. A car came careening through the intersection against the red light and hit her. One of her sons was in the vehicle too. He survived but his mental abilities were affected and his breathing is now different (he had to be intubated). My cousin that died left behind 3 children and a husband. Her husband remarried (he wasn't a JW) and as far as I know 2 of the 3 kids are not JW. They are all adults now.
I wonder how the changes to the blood policy have affected them. No one has ever said and I have not asked.
So my cousin who emailed me, his daughter got married about 11 years ago. I took Dad to the wedding. It was there that my cousin's Mom (my Aunt) says to me "Heaven. I wasn't supposed to get old!" I just nodded my head (I try hard not to get into in-depth discussions on this stuff with my family as they don't want to hear what I have to say). My Aunt's health is not good. Her daughter is looking after her.
All the recent changes may be affecting them as they have been JWs for decades. My cousins were born-in. It wouldn't surprise me if they are having their doubts.
Back in 2009, my cousin was contacted by one of the elders at my Dad's Hall because something wasn't right with my Dad. He wasn't cutting his grass and this elder was doing it. So my cousin emailed me. Since that time, my life has not been the same. I have had to look after Dad and that takes up a lot of time. The elder who contacted my cousin is a pretty good guy. He offered to help. I told him I appreciated it but that he had his own family to take care of. They have always offered their help. They are getting older too and their health isn't top notch so I don't bother them with my issues. I don't really want the JWs involved either.
So I haven't heard from this cousin who emailed me since he told me Dad isn't doing well and I need to check it out over 7 years ago. I am wondering why suddenly he is emailing me. His Mom used to call my Dad and chat on the phone but Dad's phone has been disconnected now for a few years. Am wondering if it has to do with some sort of recent JW stance... maybe this whole 'GB are not perfect nor infallible' thing was their straw.
I replied to him last night. Will wait to see if I get anything back.
Ooops... looks like this wasn't very short.