SHE LEFT ME!

by Yerusalyim 80 Replies latest jw friends

  • LyinEyes
    LyinEyes

    God, Yeru I truly feel for you and your wife. This is classic bipolar manifestations. Unless you have lived with someone like this you just can not begin to understand the rollercoaster ride. I am sure she is sorry and she does want to come home. Her high is wearing off. THis is a very misunderstood illness and often misunderstood by the person who has it, plus add the other disorder you said she has and no wonder she is in a mess, without the meds. I totally agree since things have gotten so out of control for her, she really needs the meds and counseling. Have you thought Yeru, of having her put in the hospital for this. Many times a bipolar person, gets so out of touch with reality and off the meds they need to go in to , to get the meds right, often in high doses at hospital , and they can begin her counseling right there. I think what you are doing is very kind to her, she probably can't admit that you are doing this for her own good, but later when she is well she will see it. There is alot I can say about this illness, I am sure you know it very well, it is a tricky one. ALot of bipolar people do not want to stay on their meds.

    Anyway, if you think a temp seperation , that may turn out perm. might be in order, putting her in a hopsital, with a good mental health facility would be a great way for her to use her time while not at home.

  • 68storm
    68storm

    Hello Yeru! My brother in the faith,

    I am so sorry to hear about the breakdown. I don't know if you remember me. We exchanged a few e-mails in the past. I am the "Italian Stallion" that had been married to a jw for 25 years. Even though she left 6 years ago, this past summer, we both admitted that we still loved each other. It has always been a struggle because of her religion. I tried, to very gently plant small seeds in her controlled mind this past year, put to no avail.

    In July of this year, while I had her somewhat in a mellow mood, I mentioned some things about Dateline. She seemed to listen this time without going out of control. To my surprise, she recently got engaged to a brother and is to bemarried soon.

    She was also diagnosed bipolar. It would be interesting to do a study of the women in the wts and see how many have this affliction. Who knows? We may have a way of lowering their numbers by spiking their drinks with lithium.

    Again, may you have a quick recovery.

    God bless,

    68storm

  • MegaDude
    MegaDude

    Yeru,

    Have you read the book "An Unquiet Mind" by Kay R. Jameson? It's a book on bipolar disorder and it's written by someone with bipolar disorder. Very, very good and insightful. Good luck.

  • Billygoat
    Billygoat

    Yeru,

    Again, you are in our thoughts and prayers. I am so proud of you for standing your ground with her during the crying phone call. I know that must have been difficult because I know you probably still love her!

    I have many memories that lead me to believe my father is bi-polar...was bi-polar as I was growing up. He still to this day has no idea how much pain he causes by his actions...which seem to still go on because of an enabling wife. Don't put your kids through what my step-mother put us through. Nobody protected us from his hurtful attitude, actions, and words. Even at 31, I'm still trying to heal from those wounds!

    Love,

    Andi

  • breeze
    breeze

    Yeru...

    I am new to this group. First, be careful of, listening to this bunch for real advise?

    You seem like a smart person and I am sure you will get through this very well on your own?

    Women all seem to be looking for something in their relationships that just isn't real. I have three daughters and they all think that their mates, husbands, are superhuman and can be this perfect white horse riding knight.

    Good Luck....

    BREEZE

  • ballistic
    ballistic

    breeze, by the way... us superhuman knights can't find decent women.

    Edited by - ballistic on 5 November 2002 19:45:9

  • XJwFree2BMeWJC
    XJwFree2BMeWJC

    Dear Yeru,

    I'm a newbie here. You have my prayers. Don't give up hope.

    KV

  • unclebruce
    unclebruce

    my tears are with you yeru ..unc

  • Yerusalyim
    Yerusalyim

    UNCLEBRUCE,

    How the heck are ya, LONG TIME NO SEE (or as the sailor without a watch said, "Long Sea, No Time!")

    Breeze, I take all advice given on this board with a grain of salt. Having said that, there is a wealth of working knowledge on mental illnesses on this forum as so many JW's seem to have mental illness.

    Yeppers, that phone call was VERY difficult. I began to doubt later that I had made the right decision. Turns out I was horny. A spank and a nap and I felt more secure in my decision.

    Yes, I still love her very much, but I have to think of the kids. I do battle with the rightness of this decision, which is more damaging, for Mom to be gone for an extended period of time/divorce? Or to allow her back in being sure that inspite of her promises to the contrary, the threats of leaving would pop up again. Seeing my daughter cry for a full day and my son writing some very dark poems about trust and life being a prison (I've already talked to a counselor about that) is hard. But seeing them worried mom is gonna take off again would be just as hard. They already have abandonment issues from their biological mom taking off.

    Mostly I use this board as a vent. I listen to the advice but salt it heavily.

    Prayers and well wishes still appreciated.

  • breeze
    breeze

    ...Yeru...

    I get what you mean about healing mentally with this whole website, I know there is much pain here! X-jw's and the real ones, have many problems dealing with reallity. I know because I have spent my life as a mental leach on the society.

    Maybe there is some solid advice here?

    Ballistic: Your modesty becomes you! Send pictures....I visited your website, which one is you? ....very interesting he said, with German accent...

    BREEZE

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