Why JW marriage is a huge problem for the organization.

by kneehighmiah 88 Replies latest jw friends

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  kneehighmiah

  the difficulty of finding a marriage mate is well known for sisters. But I would say it's hard for brothers also. I was talking to a jw last Night. He visited a different circuit and was lamenting the fact that there were no attractive sisters. as the organization continues to age and more young people leave it gets harder to find attractive people. We used to say that all the in shape, good looking sisters are Disfellowshipped.

  Then along comes Anthony morris. In his latest rant, he basically encourages sisters to be as unattractive as possible. He also tells sisters that they should find holding microphones attractive. That's ridiculous. who wants to marry unattractive people? The divorce rate in my area among young ones is very high. In some congregations al the young ones still active around 30 are divorcees. I've had two of my friends get married twice before age 30. me personally, I'm not at all attracted to jw women any longer. Jw women are not attracted to the socially awkward MS. The coolest people tend to be the most "worldly" As more and more JWS become incompatible with one another, I can see it posing huge problems to long term growth.
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  sparky1

  "lamenting the fact that there were no attractive sisters." "it gets harder to find attractive people." "who wants to marry unattractive people?"

  ARE YOU REALLY THAT SHALLOW?
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  sparky1

  

  kneehighmiah,You might want to look in one of these first before you go looking for a marriage mate.
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  AndDontCallMeShirley

  The qualities of a prospective marriage mate in WT Land have nothing to do with love or even liking the other person. Compatiblity is based solely on artificial, contrived, idiotic corporate rules with no other purpose than to perpetuate conformity.

  As the 3/15/15 WT clearly showed (through an alleged true experience involving "Bill" from Australia), "compatiblity" with the person you marry is based only on: they go to meetings, they go door-to-door, they read WT literature. That's it.

  WT complicates the situation further, through statements like T-Mo3's comments, that a man MUST be at least a ministerial servant to be considered worthy by a JW woman.
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  _Morpheus

  I agree with your observations on divorce frequency, at least as far as my own local area is concerned. Divorces are common among dubbies as they are anywhere else.

  I also agree that the org has a "marriage" problem in the sense that, as a cult, they are obssed with control and that includes controlling who marries who. Truth be told, i presume they would keep everyone single to allow for more focus on the 'kingdom'. They use various scriptures to support that very thing, in fact.

  I even agree that remarks like those made by tony encourage people to look for and value the wrong things is a SO, foolish things like cult tittle of MS. Those things dont to lasting marriages, as has been proven time and again.

  I would however caution you and point out that 'beauty is in the eye of the beholder'. What's attractive to me may not be to you. as long as humans have reproductive drive, humans will find other humans attractive enough to mate with :)
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  hoser

  I would add that the jw system of courtship is flawed. To always have a chaperone hanging around doesn't allow the potential couple to get to know the person. I know a few that had big surprises after the wedding. Not in a good way either.
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  designs

  If someone you like says 'I really like door to door service' would you: 1. Run 2. Call a Hot line 3. Move far away
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  piztjw

  Over a decade ago I made the observation that in the bOrg there are really only two kinds of females of marraige age. . . those who are already married, and those who are single, for damned good reason.

  What man in his right mind wants to take on as a marriage partner someone who is morbidly obese, doesn't have a clue about applying make-up, doesn't own or know how to use a hair brush, is a chronic hypochondriac, has several ill-behaved pre-schoolers, and spends money like there is no end to it?

  I for one refuse to take on THAT kind of commitment, but back in the day the oh so "loving" brothers said I had a good selection. After all those undesirable traits would be changed after the Big "A". . .SOON!

  My choice was a hard working, attractive, healthy (gasp) WORLDLY woman. Best choice possible, and the catty remarks of the JW's hags be damned.
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  prologos

  talking about that framed mirror above, I told the sister that eventually maried me: " there are seven mirrors in my house, and I want to see you in all seven of them." She still beautifully 'decorates my life'* after 20+ good years.

  Morpheus: Morphing with someone? The habit of some, to mate with eyes closed, could be explained by the reality, that the looks of the mate did not meet the expectations, but the drive of the hormons made it happen anyway.

  * as the song says also. do you still hear the melody too?

  The procreation drive is a huge plus for the WT. they control it, or imply to, by the regulations. they coralled prospective mates, who they cerity more or less as subscribing to faithfulness. ( individual results vary)
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  Blackfalcon98

  marked