10 Years out of the JW Organization- What I've Learned ( For what it's Worth)

by flipper 100 Replies latest jw friends

  • flipper
    flipper

    10 years ago I stopped attending Jehovah's Witness meetings for good. Walked out of the kingdom hall cold turkey never to return based on injustices I observed among others and myself at the hands of elders giving out not God's counsel but personal opinions as counsel . Some of them weren't even giving out WT Society counsel- just personal opinions. This alleged " counsel " destroys lives if followed, breaks up families, and the stress from having to live up to " perfect " expectations can drive Witnesses around the bend mentally, emotionally, and physically. Many like myself - at one time or another reach our " breaking point " where we just cannot take the micromanagement of our personal lives anymore. I reached that point at age 44 over 10 years ago after having been born and raised in the JW cult for 44 years. It wasn't until AFTER exiting the Jehovah's Witness organization that I started learning how insane, destructive, and criminal this organization REALLY was as I was under " information control " not allowed to be exposed to outside information to educate my mind and be informed so as to have a fuller, clearer picture of how myself and other JW's were SO deceived and manipulated. These are a few of the points I thought I'd share that I discovered so perhaps newly exiting Witnesses hoping to have freedom of mind will perhaps feel LESS guilt or fear in starting a new life after leaving the Witnesses and WT Society organization.

    1. The thing that puzzled me being raised up a JW was always being told how " special " we were as Witnesses. Phrases were used to control our thinking like " you are a people for special possession " or we were such " privileged people " when compared to allegedly " worldly people " whom Jehovah would destroy at Armageddon because they wre " sinful " and not in the Jehovah's Witness organization. In my opinion I feel that this is one of the main reasons Jehovah's Witnesses have such an ELITIST attitude about themselves being better than non-Witnesses due to the fact that this " privileged people " thinking is pushed so hard into their psyche by WT leaders and writers from the moment they start reading JW material or listening to talks at kingdom halls. And the ironic thing is that JW's are ONLY considered " special " to WT Society leaders interests based on how much they attend meetings or donate contributions to WT Society interests. In reality- in the REAL world JW's are no more special than ANYBODY else on the planet - except in their own eyes THEY feel more worthy than non-Witnesses. Once a Jehovah's Witness sees the WT Society for what they are ( a money making corporate business disguised as a religion ) and exits the religion- they no longer remain a " special people " to ANY former JW's they knew. Including WT leaders. They become expendable.

    2. O.K. 2nd point I've learned is that as Jehovah's Witnesses we were told that to be considered " spiritual " we had to attend 5 meetings a week, go out in weekly field service, give talks on the podium in the Theocratic Ministry School, raise our hands and comment at meetings, turn our field service time in at the end of each month, clean the kingdom hall restrooms and building, pull weeds in the parking lot, take a " written review " once a month to see what we learned, carry microphones up and down aisles if we " qualified " as male JW's , be parking lot attendants at assemblies, make hoagie sandwiches at assemblies, etc. etc. The point I'm making is as long as we performed all these WT " functions " we would be considered " spiritual ". Being " spiritual " had nothing to do with showing love, kindness, mildness, self control, or long suffering the Bible " frutiages of the spirit " - no, not at all - being considered " spiritual " was ONLY performing WT Society functions AS directed by the WT Society whose leaders THEN told you if you were " spiritual " or not by performing WT functions. It had nothing to do with being kind, good as a person, or helping brother or sister older ones giving food, care in their homes, or rides to the store. THOSE things were NOT considered WT Society functions or WT " priorities ".

    So what this thinking and mentality created was JW " brothers " being appointed to positions of elder, Circuit Overseer, etc. based on how well they performed WT Society functions - NOT how kind or loving or considerate or Christian they were in their personalities. So think about it : How else can you explain men being appointed as elders who continue as such for years as they perform WT functions well at the kingdom hall, yet they may have beat their wives, children, molested children , or otherwise have bee really scumbags in their personalities- yet got away with it for years ? Even NOW many of these men serve and no alleged " holy spirit " has them removed from their positions ? Which leads me to my 3rd point.

    3. The WT Society leaders and Jehovah's Witnesses are NOT led by any alleged " holy spirit " . There IS no such thing. If there was, a God or " Jehovah " would have exposed it and chosen another organization. And who knows if that has ever happened ? It's a subjective answer and cannot be proven.

    4. I also have learned that YOU and I as exiting Jehovah's Witnesses ARE special based on WHO we are individually- NOT in association with any particular organization, religion, company we work for or whatever. We are special based on having humanity and what we bring to the table in sharing peaceful relations with others based on sharing our love, life, freedom of thoughts and expressions in order to afford other people the freedom to have their thoughts and expressions. You don't have to think the same way I do, nor do I have to agree with you. You want to be religious ? Fine. Atheist ? Fine. Agnostic ? Fine. Any of us can and should have the freedom of mind to choose WHO or WHAT we are based on access to information and not be made to feel guilty or in fear because of that.

    5. Last but not least I have learned that I was lied to by an organization that has committed criminal actions towards other humans - and yet- will probably never be held liable in a court of law because WT Society actions have been done in the name of " freedom of religion " by the U.S. constitution. Children and other led to their deaths by refusing blood transfusions, Malawi JW's being killed for not signing a political party card, while the same thing was not required of Mexico JWs. JW children being molested in the thousands by authority figures within Jehovah's Witness congregations without the molesters going to jail or having to answer for felony child abuse. Adults and minor children committing suicide because of being shunned and kicked out of JW families due to following shunning policies by the WT Society. The WT Society has EXTREME bloodguilt on their heads and it will continue as long as the WT organization carries on it's criminal policies like it has the last 134 years unabated.

    In closing I have learned I CAN and AM happier not being enslaved by an organization that didn't give a damn about me or others like me. I have much more enduring friendships, a better non-Witness wife, I have the opportunities to pursue my business more fully unencumbered by pressures to perform " WT functions ". I can pursue fun hobbies like playing music on my guitar, singing, hiking & fishing in the mountains, help others in volunteer work without guilt, and feel really good about myself without having to give ANY credit to " Jehovah " or an organization for the good that I do. My self esteem has been built up over these last 10 years and my happiness increases more ad more as the years go on. So that's about it for my ramblings. If any of you newly exiting are reading this, please realize that in your leaving or exiting the Jehovah's Witness cult- your life isn't ending, your whole life is just beginning with positive, new beginnings that will take you places towards freedom and fulfillment. Be patient. It's tough at first, but in time you WILL succeed in having a happy life free of guilt and fear that the WT Society instilled into us. I raise my glass tonight to all of you who have escaped to freedom of mind ! Keep on keeping on, O.K. ? We can all do this ! Peace out and much love to every last one of you

  • Splash
    Splash

    Anyone else and I would have thought twice about reading a long post like this one.

    You're a lovely man Flipper, with a huge heart.

    Thank you for sharing these thoughts. Keep on being a caring human being, an example to the rest of us.

    Splash

  • ShirleyW
    ShirleyW

    Once again Flip you nailed it on the head.

    When you watch the travel shows and they show churches built even going back to the 1600's with all the ornate statues and pictures but yet according to the Dubs that's all garbage and they're right. A cult that's the same age as the light bulb started by a man with a drinking problem, who if I'm not mistaken was involved with the Masons, and now they blindly follow seven out guys in Brooklyn who have them believing everything they same is coming straight from Jehovah .

  • yadda yadda 2
    yadda yadda 2

    What a thoughtful and encouraging post. You're absolutely spot on with everything you say. I raise my glass back to you Mr Flipper and all others who have escaped religious mental indoctrination, manipulation and falsehoods. Life indeed does get better post-JW!

  • Iown Mylife
    Iown Mylife

    EXCELLENT summary, and thank you for posting, I appreciate it so much.

  • breakfast of champions
    breakfast of champions

    Yep - that about sums it up!

    Thanks again, FLIPPER

    One of these days we're going to have a beer together!

  • Quandry
    Quandry

    You are right-it is tough at first, but so worth it to lead your own life without constantly striving to please everyone in the congregation and always feeling that you are coming up short. No matter what you did, someone in Africa did it after crossing a crocodile-infested river, or did it with no legs.

    You are also right that the friendships are conditional. My husband and I had hundreds of "friends" after being in many congregations, always on building projects or some volunteer something. Where are they now? When we quit going, they quit calling.

    I raise my glass back to you! We are freeeeeeeeeeee

  • Lied2NoMore
    Lied2NoMore

    Amen...and I would love to meet you and hang out sometime if I ever head west I will seek to meet up.

    Another ugly byproduct of the WT machine is the elitist mentality spreads and even one JW is never good enough for another and the hateful gangrene of separation and class distinctions are in full swing even amongst fellow JWs. People are being abused by each other in rabid form in the organization and it grows worse by the day....I want out but family is still in for most part...so still exposed to all the shit still...hate it

    You expressed yourself impeccably

  • 3rdgen
    3rdgen

    Flipper, I have told the exJWs I have spoken to that you are THE REAL DEAL! You and your "worldly" wife have shown hubby and me more kindness and love in a couple of short visits than we EVER experienced in the WTBT&. (almost 6 decades!)Cheers

  • insearchoftruth4
    insearchoftruth4

    So well said Mr Flipper, my baby read this to me over the phone and it made me feel real good man. You have beautiful family bro. BEAUTIFUL.

    I really hope that little sister wins the the battle and the war, and with friends like you and your family man, it can happen bro, let us know.

    P.S. That big JW sister that played basketball with you guys. When you ocasionally run into her and ask how husband and her are doing, how did she

    respond again man? That is way too funny!! "a classic"

    Amor and peace out bro to you and the family...

    insot4

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