I remember the feeling I had after I had done my research and finally realized "This is it. It's just us and probably no one else." It literally felt as if the world turned upside down; but it was such a relief compared to the junk I had pummeled into my brain since I was five years old. It's not for the faint hearted, but everyone should have at least the chance to thoroughly examine and challenge their beliefs, and question what they know and how they know it.
Welcome to the forum Suspicious! Like many have said, just take things slow. We all come to our realizations about the religion in our own time. We all have different beliefs about God and this is a safe place to discuss that. One of the biggest questions to ask yourself is "Why are witnesses not allowed to do any research?" You definitely can't research "worldly" books though the Watchtower and Awake often quote these worldly books. But you also aren't allowed to research older books and magazines published by the Society themselves. The foundational doctrine is changing and has changed before our eyes. The light isn't getting brighter, they're just changing the rules. It's difficult to accept that people you've trusted most have been blindly following the blind. But when your eyes have been opened you can't close them again. Just try not to get overwhelmed and limit yourself on how much time you spend researching. The repercussions of leaving the organization depend mostly on how close you are to your family and friends who are witnesses. The shunning is the most dangerous and harmful part of the religion. Many who are shunned suffer from depression, PTSD and for some suicide. This is not because they leave "the truth" but because of the shunning. This is why you must be careful.
As for believing in God, I do. But my belief in who God is has changed. For me, I believe that we are all one. Every atom is connected throughout the universe. If we are all pieces of the whole, then we are all experincing life itself from different perspectives. How better for God to learn about itself? We learn throughout our lives, we have a wide range of emotions the most important being love. After all, if we are all one then you definitely want to be kind to yourself, hence the morals. ;-) But when our physical bodies are done then we go back to Source. Is there an afterlife? I don't know but energy is never destroyed, it just changes form. And we are all energy. This is what makes sense to me but you may find another way that makes sense to you.
Here's another common thing that happens to JWs when they start to do research critical to the Watchtower
Many of us feel guilty for even questioning . Think about it that makes no sense its not healthy .
Also some of us have gotten uncomfortable physical feelings like headaches and a feeling of
doing something wrong.
If this supposed truth can't stand up to hard questions and research ITS FALSE .