Maybe that is it Shel,
It's always fun to watch Christians hypothesized about why atheists become atheists. We are here, we tell them in detail, but they are always looking for some 'unspoken' reason. It is always a little baffling, but mostly amusing.
When I was a non-atheist I did the same thing. My faith was so strong, and I was so certain that God existed, I just could not fathom that someone like me could ever be an atheist. Absolutely impossible. Perhaps they were angry, hurt or disappointed and that led them to declare there was no evidence for a god. Perhaps they don't recognize all the signs as the evidence they really are. Perhaps they see how people that claim to be Christian act, and conclude that this Christ cannot exist, because these people did dispicable things. Maybe they have seen all the damage that religion has done and concluded there was no God without looking more deeply. Afterall, they never really knew my god, and my god is real, no question about it. Or they could just be stubborn or evil and absolutely refuse to accept all that evidence at hand.
I was certainly safe. My heart was with God and Christ, and I had a constant awareness of their presence. I knew. Faith like mine could not be shaken. Others may not have the same kind of faith, but I did. Even if I got angry, even if I lost my enthusiasm, there was one fact that could never change, and that was that GOD EXISTS. Whatever troubles may come my way, God exists. I could never be an atheist. Others wouldn't be atheists if they could just work through those issues. If they could just see.
I was comforted by such thoughts. I was protected by my faith. I would always have my faith, and others could have it too, if they would just be open to it. If they would just be humble and accepting. That's their problem.
I never fully accepted that maybe they had a point. They just didn't understand. I would never be an atheist.
I'm an atheist that smiles when I see how non-atheists hypothesize about why I am an atheist. I know they can't accept the real reasons I took this path. I couldn't. I won't assign motivations for why they can't accept it, but I know why I couldn't. I was right and they were wrong, and I was so certain, so absolutely certain, I would always be protected from atheism. One cannot deny what is true! LOL
Carry on. Crack this code! Get to the real reason atheists are atheists. Don't ask or accept an atheist's answer to the question, because you are right, you know it, you feel it, and so, it just must be something else, and they will only leave the real reason unspoken anyway. If my faith had been as strong as yours, I would still believe. The JW's messed me up spiritually. LOL. I never met your particular version of Christ. I threw the baby out with the bathwater. But there is definitely a deep rooted reason that I am an atheist, and it has nothing to do with the reason I claim. No. Christ gives you the wisdom to know differently! Faith gives you license to psychoanalyze. It's fun! It used to be fun for me too. But above all, feel safe in your own unshakable faith. Nothing can rattle it! Mine was defective, so don't worry, because yours is not.