Stupid suggestion from Study Conductor

by roxanesophia 125 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • roxanesophia

    Hi everyone, first I just want to say if it wasn't this forum, I'd be baptized! So THANK YOU for that.

    I haven't managed to successfully end my studies with a zealous JW. She uses everything against me to brainwash me into believing i NEED the org. But I don't feel the love of the so called family and all their motives have become questionable. They're obviously desperate not to lose me and I don't know if it's out of love, or because they have to convert people. Everytime I have a problem it's the devil. This is only causing me even more damage because now I'm only convinced Satan is more powerful than God!

    Anyway, the 3 day convention is coming up and Hitler my study conductor knowing I'm likely not to go the whole 3 days, arranged for us to stay in a motel with other JW's so I can't go home or decide not to go the next day. I told her I'm sick and really won't be able to do it. She fires back with there's first aid there, so no problem, "oh you'll feel so much better when you're there", Or you don't have to come to the convention, you can stay at the motel.

    WHAT!? What is the damn point then of me being there if I'm just going to stay at the motel? Does it look GOOD on her if i go or something or reflect badly on her if I don't because I'M REALLY struggling to understand the logic. I told her I'd drive up on my own for one day and she won't hear of it. I just want to her to accept my "NO" but I'm so confused as to what she's thinking. Is it possible she likes me and wants my company? LOL. I'm a worldly person after all, hard to believe. I'd like to be friends with her but I know JW's don't work like that. I'm thinking it looks better for her if she can tell people she got me there but I'm sick at the motel instead of "she didn't come at all." I'm going crazy anaylyzing the situation and that stupid idea of going and sitting in a motel room instead of just STAYING HOME! She implies I'm in so much better care with them than i will be with my very non JW family at home.

    But for some reason she wants to me to haul my sick ass an hour away and then NOT attend the convention if I don't feel like it. It's a really awful feeling not knowing what someone's true intentions are. Since she won't take "No" for an answer, I was thinking of using the waste of time to my advantage like:

    -Going to the motel, not going to the convention (since she said it was OK!) and let her see me reading the KJV in the motel room and other religious books that I know JWs aren't allowed to read.

    -Going to the convention in a bad mood and showing absolutely no interest and maybe after those 3 days of misery I won't even have to tell her I'm not studying anymore.

    All other suggestions are welcome! I don't know what to do. On one hand I like her and the other I don't trust her enough to enjoy this weekend.

  • Heartofaboy

    She'll get brownie points for getting you there, just tell her very FIRMLY but CALMLY that YOU will decide for yourself if you go or not.

    Being in a motel room when feeling unwell would be hell.

    Do you really think she will let you stay there at the motel after she's got you this far???


  • Alfred

    Are you here only study? If so, she's not going to let go of you because you've become her spiritual status symbol.

  • Slidin Fast
    Slidin Fast

    Hi, I'm glad you've seen how things are. The problem is that your study conductor is probably sincere and completely convinced of everything she says. She thinks she is saving your life. She is desperate to get you involved and thinks she is doing the best she can for you. This makes you feel tied to what is suggested even when it is plainly stupid.

    The only way to deal with it is firmness. If you keep dabbling you will get caught up and moved along. A clean cut is probably the only way at this stage. Not easy but thats my advice.

  • Black Sheep
    Black Sheep

    Take out a restraining order against her.

  • Pams girl
    Pams girl

    Hiya! They pulled this one on me a few times. Im agoraphobic and suffer with very debilitating panic attacks..."Oh weve got an area where you can sit in the quiet and trained medical staff to assist you"...Bulls***!

    If you dont want to go, DONT! Be firm. I know its awkward, but the longer this plays out, the more you will end up suffering. I agree with Sliding Fast on this one. YOU are in charge of you, NOT them. Dont feel pressured into a gult trip. They need are MORE than just a number arent you?

    Paula x

  • the-illuminator81

    Simply say no.. if she doesn't accept it, say no again. You don't have to explain why not. If she wants to know why, simply tell her "I don't want to explain to you why. I simply don't want to go and I don't want to continue with my bible study either and I don't want to talk about it." You are in control of your own life, don't let others make you do things you don't even want to do.

  • AnnOMaly

    roxanesophia: I told her I'm sick and really won't be able to do it. She fires back with there's first aid there, so no problem ...

    Pams girl:Im agoraphobic and suffer with very debilitating panic attacks..."Oh weve got an area where you can sit in the quiet and trained medical staff to assist you"

    km 5/97 p. 5 par. 19 1997 "Faith in God's Word" District Convention

    First Aid:The First Aid Department is for emergencies only. It is not able to care for the chronically ill. That is why you should consider the health needs of yourself and your family in advance. Please bring your own aspirin, digestive aids, bandages, safety pins, and similar items, as such things will not be available at the convention. Any known to be at risk of seizures, insulin shock, heart problems, and so forth, should anticipate their needs to the extent possible. They should have the necessary medication, and a member of the family or the congregation who understands their situation should be present with them at all times to provide any needed assistance. Problems have arisen at conventions when individuals with chronic health problems were left alone and became ill. The convention administration has had to contact emergency medical services to take them to a hospital. If some with special health needs do not have family members who can assist them, their congregation elders will need to be apprised of the situation and make necessary arrangements to help. No provision will be made at the conventions for special rooms to accommodate those who have allergies.

  • AnnOMaly

    roxanesophia - don't be pushed around. You do what you feel comfortable with. Don't be bamboozled into a situation where you will end up feeling ill, resentful and angry. "I know you mean well," you can say with a smile, "but I will do what I know I can cope with." End of story.

  • bats in the belfry
    bats in the belfry

    Will somebody be so kind and explain to me what good the First Aid Department does do if they have to call the medics?

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