Another Elder

by burnedout 94 Replies latest jw experiences

  • burnedout

    Thanks to everyone for the warm reception. It feels good to know I am not the only one to go through this.

    It was fun the night of my 'deletion announcement,' mostly I got comments about how people were happy for me and that they could not believe I had lasted this long.

    As a contrast to that, most of the elders don't even talk to me now except for the COBE. Two of the youngest, newly appointed elders say hi when they have to. I recognize the look of stress on their faces at the KH.

    When I do go to a meeting, I tell my wife, 'Hey, guess what, I don't have to give any parts tonight!!!'

    It has been a little while since my 'deletion', so far I have taken my kids out on the canoe, taken them for a ride in the muscle car, and done a lot of

    'regular' things. The CA was a pain though, my wife didn't like me pointing out the BS. When she initially asked me what was going on with me, I started off by asking her what the generation teaching meant. She gave me the latest answer of overlapping. I asked her what we were told to believe before that and she did not recall. It really opened my eyes. We had quite a conversation over the next 3 hours!!!

    The new light at the DC is a joke, I used to give the public talk 'Your Future, How Can It Be Known?' so I am very familiar with the doctrine from Daniel. All this hype about nothing new. I have plenty of info to gently remind my wife of after that talk is over. I am working real hard at explaining things calmly, so far she resists but understands my condition.

    Burned Out

  • godrulz

    Anyone can burn out in a secular or religious setting. JWs would be prone to this due to the endless treadmill of meetings, field service, works, etc.

    I have never been a JW. I have been burned out (nervous breakdown in 1978 that helped bring me back to God). I am an elder in an evangelical, Pentecostal church.

    I hope you find freedom from the errors of the WT to freedom in the true God/Jesus/Gospel. God sees your heart. He wants you to reject religion, not Him.

  • sizemik

    Welcome burnedout

    Converted at 22 . . . burned out at 48 . . . so much of your story is so familiar . . .

    I sat down at the dinner table with my wife and kids, and FOR THE FIRST TIME really saw my beautiful wife and two wonderful children.... I am extremely fortunate to still have my family and to find some balance now in my life.

    You and me both . . . my 3 sons are all born-in but grown men now . . . and OUT . . . all I'm left with now is some residual guilt for all the "lost years"

    Life only get's better from here . . . enjoy your family and your new life . . . and the Forum . . . you'll like it here.

  • Quandry

    A bit of advice: Please don't expect your wife to feel as you do. You must have patience. If she had been the one to call B.S. first, you know how you would've been programmed to answer.

    I do hope that you two can get on the same page, but it will take kindness and much thought without being pushy.

  • stuckinamovement


    Are you my twin?? LOl I recently quit as an elder also, for many of the same reasons. I am still active but have begun my fade. I will never forget walking out of the last Elders meeting I was a part of with a bigass smile on my face. Nothing better than knowing that you are done. Was KM school excruciating?

    Best wishes


  • burnedout

    Hi SIAM, yes I attended KM school in December. It was horrible. I had already mentally made my decision to resign but went to KM school anyway. The BS was everywhere!!!

  • stuckinamovement

    Burned out,

    I sat there in my school and looked around and wondered how many of the Brothers sitting in that KH actually believed it. The talk on protecting your kids from blood just about put me over the edge. Good to have another ex elder on the Board. I have been telling my wife that there are many more like me out there who are quitting as elders for reasons of conscience. It is nice to see.


  • thenoblelodge

    wow good to have you here.

    Hope everything continues to go well for you.

  • Hairyhegoat


    Me and sleeping beauty are from the UK and we were burnt out after 10 years or more of full time work and meeting etc.. Sleeping beauty worked for the home office and I was a support engineer for secret high level government comms GCHQ and MI5 etc, We were on loads of money and paying over a £1000 per month to a JW child minder ! My family who are still in told us to quit our government jobs as the end was so closeThis was back in 1995. Well here we are still breathing and the witness family have still not talked to us in 3 years We have shunned them now and if my df brother ever see's David Ryan he will floor him Take note we will not have any conversation with you ever again! You treet us as dead then we will do the same Jonathan Ryan your brother was behind your Vauxhall Zafira on Sunday and I have a new car so you weren't looking for me. Your 3 kids were in the car and we saw you freeky white hair and can you confirm you plate as BU08 YBF. How dare you drive past County Drive and not come and see us??? You are a ashole David Ryan. You go in the ministry every week to talk to strangers but cut off your own family members ! What good is that you think more of drones at the meetings than your own sibblings, the fact that you did not go to you brothers wedding last year cuz he df goes down very bad with the rest of the family. Uncle Tony want's you dead ! And Brendan is waiting for you aswell

    We hate you also

  • leavingwt
    I am still 'in' but do not put up with any
    BS now at all, and everyone knows it.

    PLEASE proceed with caution. Merely talking in a negative way about the WT Society can lead to your disfellowshipping. Losing your wife then becomes a very real possibility. Many JW spouses decide that they cannot live with an 'apostate' and then the marriage ends.

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