Fell off the wagon today

by 5thGeneration 77 Replies latest jw friends

  • OnTheWayOut

    I never really counted the time I was sober. I know I went more than 10 years once while I was a JW. But I wasn't calculating the time and just figured that out later. While I was fading, I started drinking again a bit. I remember a coworker asking me how long since I had a drink. He figured I was going to answer 12 to 14 years. I said "About 4 months." He was kind of shocked. This losing one's religion while family stays in is kind of depressing and drinking was my coping mechanism.

    AA kind of encourages the counting part, but what's most important is today- getting back on that wagon. While it was not wonderful to drink after a year, as long as you didn't stay in the hole at the bottom of your well, you can be okay. Even if you did some damage to your car or you killed someone else in a drunken stupor, you can start being sober again afterward. (I assume you didn't wreck the car or kill someone, so that would be even better.)

    Right now, I am somewhere over 2 years sober. That don't mean crap as far as today or tomorrow is concerned. Today, I choose not to drink. I will have to see about tomorrow.

  • Room 215
    Room 215

    Courage 5thGeneration; been there, done that: "Today is The Tomorrow I Dreaded Yesterday." It's a new day, a clean slate; the old cliche "one day at a time" is a valid one. We all stumble but need to move on.

  • designs

    OTWO, Room, 5th-

    All the best, we are making it one day at a time.

    Places and events can trigger powerful memories.

    Drop me a PM if you like.

    10 years sober.

  • JediMaster

    Don't get all pissed at yourself and think eveything you've worked for is just gone and tumbled cuz of this one time. Clean up, shake off the excess dust, or in this case vodka, and get on the wagon again. Aaaaall Aboooaaard!!!!!! And......PUSH!!!


  • snowbird

    (((((((5th Gen)))))))

    Don't beat up on yourself or Outlaw.

    Outlaw always tries to diffuse a tense situation with humor; he did so on my thread about my g'son's explicit drawings.

    It worked!

    So, you fell off - get back on, and hold on tighter this time.

    You can do it!


  • mindmelda

    Did it work? Getting bombed, I mean. Did it fix that bad feeling for more than an hour or so?

    I'm betting not.

    When you figure out why you felt bad, that'll work better. Sounds like something you just didn't feel like dealing with, I'm guessing.

  • designs


    Time related events like the first week, month, year, are very powerful in the life of a recovering addict. You experience extreme emotions, have dreams, and can taste and smell the drugs and alcohol you were addicted to. With help and advise you can educate yourself to expect these things and not be tripped up by them.

    The train can leave the station and you don't have to ride it anymore...............

    37 years an addict, 10 years sober.

  • cult classic
    cult classic

    I don't fully understand alcoholism. But you were sober for many many days. You'll be sober many many more.

    I think Outlaw, techdotcom, and transhuman's position is healthy. Don't beat yourself up and make it worse than it has to be. Using humor to cope with our "failures" is beneficial.

    Cult Classic

  • mindmelda

    I'm in ACOA, I try to understand my own addiction. I know now what triggers mine, I think that's important.

    Mine isn't booze it's food and tranquilizers. I had to break my Xanax habit a few years ago, I was relying on it to keep panic attacks away and it gets where it doesn't work anymore.

    Mine is triggered by Nov. 18, I usually go pretty nuts jonesing for a tranquilizer or sometimes, even booze (although I can't drink enough to get drunk, I'm alcohol intolerant and it just makes me sick as a dog instead of drunk after one glass) that whole month. That's the day my daughter died and I started panicking at everything that reminded me of it, even subtlely.

    Xanax acts just like booze but it doesn't make me sick, which is why I love it.

  • Eiben Scrood
    Eiben Scrood

    I too deal with this issue. I'm impressed by the number here who can relate. I wonder if JWs and ex-JWs have a higher incidence than the average population....

Share this