ex wants to be free to remarry - ugh

by No Apologies 71 Replies latest jw friends

  • No Apologies
    No Apologies

    Ok, I'm sure I am not the first one to be in this predicament but it sure is a headache, my JW ex called a few days ago, apparently she has met someone (they're not dating of course!) and she wants to me to hand over the golden ticket. She wants confirmation either in writing or verbally to a third party, that she is "scripturally free" to remarry.

    I have managed for years now to avoid any Judicial action and my JW family members still associate with me, but that all could come to a screeching halt if I give her what she wants.

    The only bright side is she totally robbed me on the divorce; if she gets married I am at least off the hook for "spousal maintenance", that would mean potentially thousands of dollars in my pocket...

    What to do what to do...

    No Apologies

  • bluecanary

    Either way offers both a loss and win. You'll have to decide which sacrifice you're willing to make and which benefit is more important to you. If the money wasn't an issue I would point out that you have already made her free to remarry by getting a legal divorce. If she wants to play by the rules of a ridiculous cult, she's welcome to it.

  • Bourne

    I would say "F**K her. She's on her own."

  • Gopher

    JW rules tell your family it's okay to associate with you. JW rules say your ex cannot currently remarry.

    Yours is the only case where I can remember saying "hooray for JW rules"!

  • ColdRedRain

    This is where being a weird guy that can't keep a girlfriend that's sane has its advantages. None of them married me yet (Although the last one with glasses was a close call, LOL!)

    IMHO, let her do what she does. A book publishing company's rules is no match for nature. She'll make herself "Scriptually free to remarry" in a few months or years.

  • Farkel

    :She wants confirmation either in writing or verbally to a third party, that she is "scripturally free" to remarry.

    Write her a letter telling her to go fornicate with herself and that you will do everything in your power to see that self-gratification is all the real sex she will ever get as long as you are alive.

    Then go out and screw your brains out with every skirt that is ready, willing and eager. Be discrete, of course.

    You do NOT have to play by her rules anymore, you know.


  • watson

    I say take the bucks and send her the letter.

  • DaCheech

    i would hold off as long as your pocket can hold.

    make her sweat it, if she is caught with this guy, get her df'd. she will be free then

  • mrsjones5

    "What to do what to do..."

    Do nothing.

  • horrible life
    horrible life

    Ask her, verbally, how much it is worth to her, for you to lie. Tell her to put it in writing, and turn it over to the elders. That may get her a slap on the wrist, or even more.


    Make a good deal for yourself, and take some of the money she took from you, and some future money.

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