Have You Ever Been Stalked?

by eclipse 119 Replies latest jw friends

  • ex-nj-jw
    ex-nj-jw

    Nope, Nope

    Clipsy I hope you are ok, please be carefull and let the police know

    nj

  • bebu
    bebu

    While living in Japan, a Japanese acquaintance (40 yr old) began to follow me in his car as I rode my bike home each night, a 3-mile trip. I was 22. He was having marital problems and was also EXTREMELY wealthy. I had spoken nicely to him, nothing forward, and he read a LOT more into it than he should have.

    Until I figured out that it was HIM that was stalking me, I was nervous a bit. You know--riding home in the dark with a car driving slowly behind you, passing you, then coming back around to follow again? Oh yeah, it really made me feel like "he was the one for me". A real effective technique to win someone over.

    Once, when I went out to eat dinner after work with a student (I was teaching and he was just a casual friend), he followed us into the restaurant and sat down across from us. When we left in the student's car (he was dropping me off at home), the man followed--and really annoyed us both! So I urged my student to see if he could somehow get behind the guy's car to follow him, and he managed it! We ended up following my stalker around for a mile or two, and then shook him off. We laughed the whole time, I'll tell you.

    In the end this guy was confronted by my boss, who threatened him with going to the police, and he quit--at least for a long time. I think he stalked me a couple of times after I moved to another nearby city. About 2 years later I got a message from a mutual friend that he wanted me to know he finally "got it" and realized how off-base he was, and was going to work on his marriage. And so I hope he is doing well. Never heard from him nor saw him again.

    bebu

  • Tara
    Tara

    I ended a 7 year relationship in 2004. The guy wouldn't leave me alone and wouldn't get that it was over. He kept calling me, sending me flowers, showing up at my house uninvited. I asked him to stop, begged him to stop, screamed at him to stop. He wouldn't. I changed my phone number twice to private numbers. He kept getting it. I had to get a restraining order against him. In court he annoyed the judge because when I was talking to the judge, he walked over to me twice even though she kept telling him to stay on his side. The restraining order made him stop finally.

  • momzcrazy
    momzcrazy

    Eclipse, I hope you are OK. I've never been stalked. But I have had certain circumstances where I have had my .357 mag out. A friend of mine was staying the night with her kids and her crazy ex showed up at 2 am. Note, it was in a rural area and we had a 1500 ft driveway. My hubby was in Las Vegas, so out I go with the gun. He never came close to the house, which was smart of him. He wouldn't leave so I called the sheriff. They had him leave. I called my husband the next day and told him. He called back later and said if I had any trouble to call him. He had people watching us and all he had to do was call them. I LOVE "connections"!

    Please don't take any stalking lightly. Keep in contact with the police and have documentation of all interactions between you and the police, and you and the stalker. You're not in the US I see, so I don't know what your laws are on gun control. In our house we are for gun education and use if needed. You MUST know how to use it if you get one. My hubby is a licensed carrier.

    momz

  • misanthropic
    misanthropic

    Be careful Eclipse- if you think you're being stalked and fear for your safety notify everyone you know as well as the police.

  • John Doe
    John Doe

    Sounds creepy eclipse. If you have to ask, that seems to be a good indicator you need to take some sort of action. What does the person do?

  • little man
    little man

    It would be a challange and hope they are ready. Just make sure they are looking for u and get behind them when least expected.

  • Twitch
    Twitch

    Yup. For weeks she showed up at every dance hall I went to. Looking for me.

    I married her a year and a half later.

  • wha happened?
    wha happened?

    ten years ago I was working sales for my company. I had a large account that was producing a good amount of work for us. I was introduced to a new purchasing manager. We would be communicating several times a day, everyday for all the repair traffic.

    It's comman for me to sort of buddy up to the purchasing managers on my large accounts. You know, lunches, gifts etc etc. Well the conmversation from her started becoming more personal and definately turning sexual. (I was a good little JW back then and married). Finally I talked to my partners about it because she just started to flat out offer the sex. She had stated that she preferred married men as they can kiss and not tell.

    We tried having her deal with someone else at my company and she refused. Threatened to pull the contracts. Then the phone calls picked up after hours. I worked late alot and she would call the office. Would drive by and check if my car was there. I was concerned she was going to start following me home. She would call the office when I was out and insisted on getting my cell# because it was an emergancy. Finally we talked to one of the GM's because it was out of control, and we didn't want to lose the account. They spoke with her and she of course denied it all. I later found out that she was hired through this special program because she is on meds because she is nuts. I guess she had an episode because she disapperaed and never came back

  • eclipse
    eclipse

    Thank you everyone for your replies.

    I am not worried about my safety, since I do know the person.

    Just sucks when another human being feels they have the right

    to see when you're not home, follow you to wherever you are going, or know when you are home.

    It's not against the law here to drive by someone's house.

    There is nothing the police will or can do since they have not done anything illegal.

    So I am not involving them until this person tresspasses on my property, or my person.

    I don't think they will...

    Thanks again for all your concern, anecdotes and posts, I appreciate them very much.

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