Who else is tired of the Just Get Over It threads?

by sass_my_frass 56 Replies latest jw friends

  • AK - Jeff
    AK - Jeff

    Thanx Sass.

    I left nearly 40 years of my life in a Watchtower dumpster. I left over conscience, and am treated worse than murderers in their midst. [True BTW, you can murder, get repentant, and go on to be fully acceptable to them].

    My crime was just finding out facts and reality.

    I don't sit about daily feeling sorry for myself. I had good things that came out of being a Jw also. But the losses are real and deep and painful.

    • The Elder that married my wife and I headed up the JC to excommunicate me for 'thinking out loud'.
    • The Elder that was among my closest friend, and the best man at my wedding, was on that committee, and shuns me in public.
    • My SIL, MIL, other SIL, my cousin, all refuse to speak with me.
    • My [former] best friend refuses to speak with me.
    • I have been branded by the most dispicable term used by Jw's - apostate.
    • When my mother died [before I was DA'd or even said anything about what I was learning], her funeral was boycotted by Jw's.
    • The lovelessness of the organization haunts me when I see any in public.

    I go thru bouts of dealing with these issues, as do many others. Those on the outside of the club we have left are not able to grasp that 'just moving on' is not that easy. But for heavens sake, those who were attached to this ruthless cult, should have enough compassion to understand.

    I hope that all of us can one day be fully healed. But I know that some will not ever fully recover.

    Thanx for posting this Sass - it needed to be aired.


  • Paralipomenon

    I think that anger is part of the healing process, but it stops being a step towards healing and becomes a way of life then you will find me saying "get over it".

    I'm reminded of an individual on Gabbly a couple months ago that would keep interrupting the conversation with venomous comments, completely at random too.

    It was obvious he wanted to get something off his chest so we asked him about his upbringing.

    He was never a witness.

    Ooooookay, so how did he know the witnesses?

    He studied for 5 months before seeing the truth.

    Interesting, and still so upset?

    YES! F**K that cult and their S**T

    Wow, so how long ago was this?

    Back in 1992.



    Okay, get over it.

    My personal advice to people is to work at healing yourself first before trying to heal others. After you have come to terms, you'll be in a better position to offer advice, otherwise you can only help others to get angry, they have no experience on how to get past that.

    That's just my unpopular opinion.

  • fresia

    Some can, for some it takes time, and for some they have found a home here, wheather that is not getting over it is not really the issue, are they content being here even after year or years of posting, some remain to help others they feel are at the point they were when they were told to get over it.

  • snowbird

    I know the feeling all too well. I feel that way when someone says the same thing about slavery and its aftermath. How can you get over it when all around you are the glaring evidence of its legacy?

    Whenever I see a showcase antebellum mansion (and there are lots of them in my area), I feel a deep anger and sadness over the lives stunted in order to maintain this fantasy. The WTS and slavers operate along similar lines - convince easily led ones that we know what's best; withhold information; keep them too busy to notice or question; and if anyone rebels, woe unto them.


  • Burger Time
    Burger Time

    My biggest problem isn't that people need time to get over it. It just seems like there is this mentality of EVERYTHING they do HAS to be evil. I even understand why some might think that, but most of the leadership probably honestly believes they are doing what's right. This isn't giving them a pass, I'm just saying a lot of the times people on here are quick to judge people who are quick to judge.

  • nvrgnbk

    Agreed, sass.

    I also see the other end of the spectrum though, like the situation Para describes.

    Either way, this place has a great skin-thickening agents.

  • Paralipomenon
    Either way, this place has a great skin-thickening agents.

    Can't argue with that!

  • Black Sheep
    Black Sheep

    It is very difficult to Just Get Over It when your family members are top Watchtower predators, highly skilled in seeking out people in their weakest moments and endangering their family relationships too.

  • sweetstuff

    Good post Sass! You hit the nail on the head, its very difficult to heal and very easy to say, get over it already people! That particular poster had a very uncommon situation and its funny, Yes, wallowing isn't good, we all know that, but healing is and healing comes with sharing and listening and those who haven't been hurt by the cult, would do well to keep that in mind.

  • ex-nj-jw


    I agree and I think your post is great.

    There are few who have come out of it unharmed and that is wonderful for them. However they are a minority! And then there are those who have never been in the organization or have married into this organization, that no matter what they say they can't possibly have a clue what it's like to grow up in or be cut off from your family and friends! I think this group annoys me the most. Some of us had no choice, we didn't choose the Jdubs. It was forced upon us from birth and only someone who has lived that can know what we had to deal with.

    Some of us have moved on, but use this forum to help others that have not been able to move on or who are still trying to move on.

    Thanks for posting this!


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