by avidbiblereader 96 Replies latest watchtower child-abuse
As someone who was molested in her mothers car with her own mother within 3 feet of the offense...........
........either shoot them on site, or put them in a prison facility where they will be molested as well by violent men who also have children.
Oh and FYI...the elders suggestion for the molestor?....take him in the back room and spank him............yeah...I bet that did a lot of good.
~luv, jojo
I understand completely where Frannie is coming from. She said that was back in the 50's. Back in the 50's and 60's, this was a subject that just wasn't talked about. Nice girls just didn't let things like this happen to them. I remember a TV documentary, probably early 70's, about why women were so slow to report rape. The defense usually would cross-examine the woman, asking them personal questions about their private lives, things like whether they were sexually active. Or, did you have the drapes closed when you were undressing in your bedroom? How short was your skirt, how tight were your clothes? They got away with this, and many woman were afraid to press charges because of the humiliation and the scandal.
That kind of thinking was reflected in the organization. Elders were probably not much different than men in general back then, and most elders haven't changed even now. However, I think that society in general (not the WTS) has come a long way even though we all agree they need to come much further. At least women can talk about it without being ostracized.
Bonnie_Clyde said: I understand completely where Frannie is coming from. She said that was back in the 50's. Back in the 50's and 60's, this was a subject that just wasn't talked about. Nice girls just didn't let things like this happen to them.
That much I understand. Rape, child molestation wasn't acknowledged either in private or public and unless the woman was a virgin, then she was more than likely made to feel as though it was her own fault, which is sick.
What I cannot comprehend----even for that era----is how anyone who had been molested by their step-monster as a child themselves, could possibly think that their own children would be "safe" in the exact same environment. Any man who can rape a child most definitely falls under the category of being "evil" as this is one of the most vile acts a human can commit. Three of my closest friends were all molested by family members when they were kids. When they had children of their own, they were never, ever left alone with these men and were not allowed to visit (who the hell would want to?) with them over the weekend or even a day or half a day. That's what I just don't get----how can you leave your own kids in the care of someone who did something so dispicable to you in your own youth and not think that history was going to repeat itself?
What I cannot comprehend----even for that era----is how anyone who had been molested by their step-monster as a child themselves, could possibly think that their own children would be "safe" in the exact same environment. Any man who can rape a child most definitely falls under the category of being "evil" as this is one of the most vile acts a human can commit. Three of my closest friends were all molested by family members when they were kids. When they had children of their own, they were never, ever left alone with these men and were not allowed to visit (who the hell would want to?) with them over the weekend or even a day or half a day. That's what I just don't get----how can you leave your own kids in the care of someone who did something so dispicable to you in your own youth and not think that history was going to repeat itself?
I'm so sorry you have comprehension problems with this Mary. If you'd walked in my shoes, you'd know that I THOUGHT IT WAS MY OWN FAULT THAT CAUSED IT TO HAPPEN TO ME! I HONESTLY DIDN'T THINK THAT MY CHILDREN WOULD BE IN DANGER SINCE MY *SON* WAS WITH MY DAUGHTER AND I THOUGHT THAT MY DAUGHTER WAS SAFE WITH HER BROTHER THERE. I HONESTLY THOUGHT THAT HE WOULDN'T DARE TRY SOMETHING WITH BOTH OF THEM THERE. I ONLY HAD MY OWN EXPERIENCE TO GO BY. IT WASN'T UP FOR DISCUSSION. IT WAS A TABOO SUBJECT. I WAS NOT AS ENLIGHTENED THEN AS I AM NOW. I'VE ALSO ADMITTED TO BEING STUPID AND NAIVE. If that doesn't satisfy you enough and you insist on placing blame on me, perhaps you'd be happier if I just go shoot myself in the head!!!
Frannie, I'm sorry........I'm lucky enough to never have been molested and you're right----I've never had to walk in your shoes and I'm sorry for making you feel worse because that wasn't my intention. I guess I'm still looking at this through the eyes of some in 2007----not 40 or 50 years ago when the world was much different. I felt sick when I read what he did to your kids----and I don't even know them, so I can't imagine what that did to you.
All I can say is that it's too bad your step-monster is already dead-----or I'd be only too happy to do you one big favour.
Frannie, I'm sorry........I'm lucky enough to never have been molested and you're right----I've never had to walk in your shoes and I'm sorry for making you feel worse because that wasn't my intention. I guess I'm still looking at this through the eyes of some in 2007----not 40 or 50 years ago when the world was much different. I felt sick when I read what he did to your kids----and I don't even know them, so I can't imagine what that did to you.
All I can say is that it's too bad your step-monster is already dead-----or I'd be only too happy to do you one big favour.
WHEW! I was afraid you'd never understand at all, Mary. I was so outraged and enraged over what he did to my children I wanted to kill him over and over and over again. Once would not have been enough. If I'd had a machine gun, he'd have been ground meat. If there hadn't been a statute of limitations back then, I'd have had him sent to prison for life without parole. My daughter didn't tell me until 6 mos. too late to file charges. It only had become a non-taboo subject that year and when I found out, I never allowed him to enter my house again and we never visited him.
We didn't tell my mother. She was ill and older by then and didn't live another year. I couldn't see any reason to ruin the rest of her life, too.
Yes, I was naive AND stupid. I honestly thought I was so flawed that I was the only one he would do that to. And I felt so much guilt and sorrow over my children. Still do. But it's over and there's nothing that can change things now, not even the guilt.
Yes, I was naive AND stupid. I honestly thought I was so flawed that I was the only one he would do that to
frannie, I think that when you are being abused and life goes on as normal around you, in your child's mind, its inevitable that you are going to blame yourself and feel like the guilty party - everything around you is fine and 'normal' only you know that you arn't - so it must be your fault. I can see why it would be unimaginable to consider that it could happen to anyone else.
Now that society is looking at the subject in such minute detail means that eventually we will do what is needed, and we'll do it together, which is how it should be.
love
bernadette
I think that when you are being abused and life goes on as normal around you, in your child's mind, its inevitable that you are going to blame yourself and feel like the guilty party - everything around you is fine and 'normal' only you know that you arn't - so it must be your fault. I can see why it would be unimaginable to consider that it could happen to anyone else.Now that society is looking at the subject in such minute detail means that eventually we will do what is needed, and we'll do it together, which is how it should be.
Yes, Bernadette. That must have been the reason why I thought something was wrong with me alone. I could not consciously imagine he would do that to anyone else.
I'm truly relieved that society is finally giving this matter the attention it deserves. It's waaaaaay overdue. Children have been victimized for too many centuries. We can all work together now, as you say.
Should they be incarcerated for life, castrated, turned over to the family member(s), public humiliation like a branding everywhere they go, tortured and or death penality?What do you think, it is evident the judical system has failed in this regard, what are your thoughts?
Child abuse offenders have the highest rate of r ecidivism of any other crime. From my somewhat limited experience, one factor is that the vast majority of offenders see nothing wrong in their desires or in acting out on them. I've read and heard from offenders that they believe that children really want to be raped; that they enjoy it.
Seriously.
With that mindset it is, I believe, very dangerous to let this type of person free having unlimited access. I also think it is foolish to rely on governmental bureauracy to monitor them.
I think one day, maybe in our children's lifetime, society will realize there is no "cure" and will permanently isolate these people to prevent them from ruining innocent lives. Until then, hundreds (if not thousands) of children are brutalized every day, most often by someone they know.
Chris
why has child molestation become such a central issue over the last few decades?
An interesting question Narkissos. As always your insight stands out. I'm curious about your thoughts. Why do you think so?
If I may, my feeling is that we live in a world with little or no taboos. There is nothing that cannot or will not be discussed, analyzed, ridiculed, parodied, etc. Incest/child abuse was the last taboo. Even in the 1980s, when I was in therapy and trumpeting as louldy as I could (to everyone's embarassment around me) about my abuse, it was a subject that was not discussed.
But even more than that, I think it is a problem that has grown exponentially. Consider the idea that one offender rapes dozens (if not hundreds) of children in a given span of time. Of those children, only a handful will grow up to become offenders themselves. But at some point, the ratio of offenders harming children begins to grow at such a rate that it becomes an issue. Even with the social taboos, and the embarassment of the subject, at some point the sheer numbers demand attention.
Of course I don't know. It's sort of a which-came-first-chicken-or-the-egg question.
Chris
