How many 'real" friends did you ever really have in ther "truth'

by The Lone Ranger 87 Replies latest jw friends

  • Crumpet
    Crumpet
    No one liked me

    I had 1 JW girlfriend when I was 13 and I think she was 15

    I'd like to hear more of that story Worldly Andre!

    One of the downsides of constantly moving to where the need was great (I had moved about 12 times by the time I was 16) was you don't get to know anyone long enough to make friends. Pity Dad never noticed the need was great at home really.

    I had one person I considered a friend and kept in touch with until he wrote saying that he would be shunning me from now on shortly after I stopped attending meetings.

  • AuldSoul
    AuldSoul

    I was a real friend to many JWs. But I have discovered that not many were real friends to me. Steve (jst2laws) was a real friend. My wife was a real friend (thankfully!). A poster here, "crazies", was (I think) a real friend. Aside from these three, I have two other dear friends who are still JWs.

    I stood as best man for a guy who will not speak to me. I asked a guy to stand as my best man who I have known since he was four years old. He was unable to fly down from Bethel on short notice. He won't speak to me now. My next choice for best man also will not speak to me.

    My only crime is that doctrine matters to me. If someone claims the Bible teaches something I expect them to be able to prove it. For this crime, I have been killed.

    Respectfully,
    AuldSoul

  • Blueblades
    Blueblades

    ONE, solid in and out of the org.

  • undercover
    undercover

    I still have a few friends in the "truth". I'm a little surprised that I have as much contact with some of them as I do.

    I figured as I disappeared from the hall, that I would lose contact with almost everyone from the hall, except for family. Even though I don't see them as often as I did before, I still have some contact with them.

    I've been to the movies with some, been to dinner with others, been invited to JW weddings, been invited to their homes. Are they trying to "love-bomb" me? I don't think so, because never not once, does anyone bring up "oh, we miss you at the meetings blah blah blah". It's like they want to forget about it also, they want to be free of it and hanging out with an inactive person is their little way of rebelling.

    I do get shunned occasionally, usually by someone who I wasn't close to anyway. When I see any elders at any of these events, they usually shy away from me. I think its a combination of trying to shame me by "marking" me and trying to set the example to others that I'm not acceptable to them. But I have sensed in at least one elder that he knows more than the other elders about what I'm doing or thinking and he's willing to let it go and not make trouble for me, so he stays out of the way, so as to not bring unwanted attention my way.

  • Crumpet
    Crumpet
    Steve (jst2laws) was a real friend.

    Auldsoul - do you still see him? If you do would you pass on my best to him, I met him last year and really found it warming to talk to him.

  • AuldSoul
    AuldSoul

    Crumpet,

    We talk often. He reads here more than he posts these days. I will pass your message along, though.

    Respectfully,
    AuldSoul

  • XBEHERE
    XBEHERE

    I think finding a "real" friend while in the JW's is an expception rather than a rule I am sorry to say. These people love conditionally... meaning if you want to remain friends you need to be loyal to the WT above all else. If you even start to question things most...MOST JW's will shun you or be evasive and flighty with you or worse yet, turn "states evidence" against you and turn you in.

  • Dansk
    Dansk

    ZILCH!

    Thought I had friends whilst in, but none of them turned out to be true. When we exited, not one person who previously considered him/herself to be friends of Claire and I came to visit or telephoned or wrote letters or sent cards when I contracted cancer. Nuff said!!

    Ian

  • plmkrzy
    plmkrzy

    There have been many jws that have helped me out in times of need but they didn’t qualify as friends I could confide in. I had a couple of jw friends that I could confide in about anything however they turned out to be not so good friends for other reasons so, I guess my answer has to be a big fat NONE.

  • diamondblue1974
    diamondblue1974
    Thought I had friends whilst in, but none of them turned out to be true. When we exited, not one person who previously considered him/herself to be friends of Claire and I came to visit or telephoned or wrote letters or sent cards when I contracted cancer. Nuff said!!

    Most of them are heartless Ian...they are taught to switch off their natural emotions and feelings because 'the heart is treacherous.'

    How misled they are...and how much are they missing out on.

    DB74

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