YOUR LAST MEETING.........................

by vitty 87 Replies latest jw friends

  • rassillon
    rassillon

    haven't had it YET.....Don't know when. Congrats to all of you who have had the circumstances to leave already. SORRY if it was painfull. Thus are the words of rassillon

  • geevee
    geevee

    Just over a year ago. Went to the BS and had to endure the conductor saying that all the people who were in a tv program about child abuse/pedo's in the dubs were apostates and liars.
    I disagreed with him in front of the whole group. Got up, spat out a bit more and left!!!!!
    I love my "free" time. About One and a half days a week.

  • hemp lover
    hemp lover

    (((candidlynuts))) (((Nina))) (((Insomniac)))

    Grammy - you gave me deja vu with this one.

    I walked up to a group of my friends 'sisters' and they all just ignored me so I just sat down in my seat until my husband was ready to leave and vowed to never return and I haven't and never will.

    Mine was the Memorial 1999. I was dfed in May of '98 and had never missed a Memorial. It was in a high school auditorium with several congregations combined. I walked in and people would look at me and then look away. I was searching for my ex-husband and daughter (who were still in) but they weren't there yet. My mother-in-law (who is still a JW to this day and probably the most Christlike person I've ever known) saw me and motioned me over to sit with her.

    When the song started, I looked up and saw the socially stunted elder who led my judicial committee standing on stage and I guess it was the combination of the "Kingdom" melody and seeing him, but I just lost it. I started sobbing through the song, because all my brain could say was "These people don't know me. They don't know me, yet they've judged me to be evil and now they're staring at me because I'm making a scene and they probably think I'm crying because I've 'left Jehovah' and am feeling remorse. Fuck it."

    I had to climb over about 20 people to get out of that row and since we were sitting close to the front, I had to walk past about 20 more rows, bawling my head off. As I exited the main auditorium, I ran into my ex and my daughter and, thinking he'd be pissed off at me, I said, "I can't do this anymore." Unbeknownst to me, he had been having doubts of his own for a while, so he was actually sympathetic.

    I cried hysterically all the way home and said horrible things to God, but I felt so good knowing that I'd never put myself through that bullshit again. It's funny (weird, not ha ha) when I look back on it now, I still thought they had the truth. I didn't really leave it until my ex told me about 607 a year later.

  • Ingenuous
    Ingenuous

    Thanks to everyone who's shared and those who may yet do so - especially the painful, personal details that make all the difference.

    I don't remember my last meeting. All I know is I quit last August and am looking forward to celebrating next month...

  • HappyDad
    HappyDad

    My last meeting was memorial of 2003. I still had a semblance of those guilt feeling.............like............what if this is really the truf?

    Previous to that...........I attended only a handfull of meetings from about 2000 when I started my fade.

    HappyDad

  • Eyebrow2
    Eyebrow2

    My last meeting was also a memorial, in 1998.
    Although I had been having some lingering uncomfortable feelings for a while, I wouldn't even recognize them as doubts I don't think. But just as my issue with being a good witness. But at that meeting something just clicked. I realized that it was bunk.

    I had a long conversation with my best friend in the parking lot after the meeting and told her I was never going back to another meeting. And I never have. The only time I have been back to the KH is when I have given my mom rides to their or picked her up.

    I was never disfellowshipped, but I think that was due to the fact that the brothers in my hall didn't see a whole lot of value in a single mother in their hall, unless you were a pioneer of course. I wasn't being an apostate so there was nothing to quiet down. They never even offered to do a sherparding call.

    I had a few conversations with my friend after that, and they always ended with her saying "If you want to see me come back to the KH." She literally lived around the corner...about 1000 feet from me. Our house was directly across the street from a street that had several witness families on it. It was nicknamed "witness row".

    I am glad now, of their apparant apathy, because it made it easier for me to fade, and for my mother to accept my non Witness husband. (After we were married, we moved back into my same apartment, and had xmas tree in the window, directly facing "witness row" for 4 years. Ahhh...it was a wonderful thing.) It is a shame that my witness "Friends" don't realize that I am not disfellowshipped. I do miss a few of them.

    I have been fortunate that my departure has been not as difficult as most here, and I really appreciate others sharing their stories.

  • BritBoy
    BritBoy
    Even if they did have THE Truth, I didn't want to spend forever with these people.

    Absolutely what I thought cruzanheart.... in the early days of having left I honestly thought "if it's 1000 years before we become perfect then that means after Armagonnageddit I have 1000 years of putting up with these self centered, obnoxious, arrogant, hypocritical twats then NO THANK YOU."

    My last meeting was the memorial in 1995...

  • wozadummy
    wozadummy

    Sorry for the pain some feel.

    Last October for us ,looking across the hall at the loud voice singing of an aging ,bald pedophile ex Elder who will shake everyones hand afterwards and cuddle the kiddies with the servant body oblivious to it all.

  • garybuss
    garybuss

    I got a letter from a Witness who knew me when I attended group meetings that said, we never liked you when you were a Witness and we're glad you're gone. Then I believe there were some of the endearing terms used, like God's gonna kill you, and Gary, you're a worm.
    I also have some of those follow up messages on my phone answering machine until I get caller ID, then the phone threats stopped. I got several death threats. "Gary, you gonna die!" was a common one.

    Such endearing people:-)

  • mrsjones5
    mrsjones5


    It was the last memorial I ever went to, in 1989. Took a boyfriend who happened to be an df'd jw. Don't know why I went. Got nothing out of it. I think my boyfriend might have been a bit tipsy. Oh yeah this the same boyfriend who introduced me to my dear hubby.

    Josie

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