why cant they see how cruel they are??

by Cordelia 63 Replies latest jw friends

  • Tigerman

    You and your boyfriend should move away for a couple years, clear your heads of JW B.S . . . THEN ,unemotionally, talk to your parents about the issues.

  • tijkmo
    Are you saying that the experiences of unbaptised born-ins are of less importance than baptised born-ins and baptised walkins?

    yes thats what i'm saying.....oh boy

    Not having a backbone is a self imposed condition.

    maybe...but that isnt the case here...and just as someone who has had their physical back broken (their very strong back) by say an illness or a car crash or the like.....so someone who has had their emotional spiritual mental back broken by the things done to them can take a while to come to terms with that....telling the wheelchair bound victim of a car crash to buck up and stop whining is not very helpful..

    I found myself urging a dear friend to buck up
    im not sure you did either of these
  • diamondblue1974

    Its easy for those who have either been through this and recovered or who have never experienced treatment of this nature to say buck up; get over it and the usual comments made with all good intentions but the reality is very different for the victim that is suffering; chances are they wont see things as rationally as those who have already recovered and come to terms with these issues; the best way to support such people is to simply be there.

    Rationalising and downplaying the situation sometimes does not help;

    As far as 'unbaptised born ins' are concerned I think that they have experiences of equal importance and are capable of suffering just as much as the baptised; a friend of mine was never baptised but her family still shun her because she wont go to the meetings; they look down on her and her partner; they humiliate her and make her feel like a second class citizen...try telling her that her experiences are of less importance.

    Sorry to dissent but thought I would throw my two pennys worth in.


  • LittleToe
    why do they not listen to what i say?

    Because they aren't interested in what you have to say. Mother is always right.

    Remember this experience when your daughter grows older

  • defd

    hi little toe. Hows it hang'n?

    Def D

  • LittleToe

    Hi Derrick,

    A little to the left, thanks.

    How about you?

  • defd

    A little to the left, thanks.

    Howd i know you was gonna say that. I cant wait to get back to days to get beat up by yall on dayshift board I am a glutton for punishment. Have you talked wqith sweetscholor yet. He is very intelligent like you. I am certain you and him will have some great discussions. I will sit back and read, I am s-l-o-w of tounge

    Def D

  • LittleToe

    You do just fine, pal - just be true to yourself

    I've seen a couple of posts by sweetscholar, but I haven't read them yet as they they are long and the formatting is awful. I'll have another glance when I've got a little more time.

  • Intuition

    Hi, Cordelia ~

    I'm 35 & was DF'd when I was 20. I have complete empathy for what you are feeling. It took almost a decade for me to work through all the emotions of that experience. It's taken me another five to finally be very happy for myself and love my life. Fifteen years of lots of hard work ... even when I didn't want to deal with it anymore. Don't give up. Keep true to what you know you need. Follow your heart. Be true to yourself. I know first hand how awful it feels to "lose" family and friends. Let me tell you LIFE IS AWESOME!!

    Vent away! Blow off steam! Girlfriend, let it out!

    ~ Intuition

  • mrsjones5
    Are you saying that the experiences of unbaptised born-ins are of less importance than baptised born-ins and baptised walkins?
    yes thats what i'm saying.....oh boy

    Wow, well Tijkmo, I respect that youre brave for saying so and that's where that ends.

    OK let's do some family history. My great-grandmother joined the jws when my mother was 4, my mother is now 61 - do the math. I dont know when my mother was baptised but it was sometime before she married my father in 1962. My father later converted in 1965 around the time I was born. One of my father's sisters converted a litte before mom and dad were married and soon after several siblings followed. Let's see if I can count them off on my faher's side: Aunt Thersa (her husband Uncle Ed), Darlene (her husband Uncle Jonathan - an elder) , Annette, and Beverly, Uncle Johnny (his wife Emma Jo), and Uncle Jackie (his wife whose name escapes me - we're not close). My father's parents converted late went I was in my late teens and early 20's. On my mother's side: her Aunt Glynsmae and a few of her children.

    So you see, I didnt just walk off the street into a kingdom hall and stay a few minutes and then declare that I was somehow harmed by such a short exposure. I was born in, it was all I knew for my formative years and I'm really offended that just because I had the good sense not to take a dip in that heated pool (or non heated so I've heard) that somehow whatever experiences that I have had and are still having with my parents are not as important as yours. Being born in still affects me to this day and I feel that somehow you think that just because I didnt take that dip that I shouldnt be here and that my opinion on Cordelia's situation is worth (for want of a better word) a hill of beans. I come here because there are people (born in and unborn in) who I can relate to and who understand how it was to grow up in the bOrg. Where is your symphathy?

    You're heartless, self-righteous, and rude


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