Hi Desi,
I have been through the same situation like you, but 10 years ago. Unfortunately when children are involved it makes thinks more hard. You can look at my previous posts, as justhuman, to see my situation.
I was MS, all my family JW's and many in 'high' places. My questioning started after the first generation change in 1995. I was really agry about that, since I spend the best years of my creative life(18-27)to be a regular pioneer. I quit school, cause the end was near(mid 80's, with all the mess in Brooklyn).
I quit a career as young and promising musician. Plus I turned down business deals, that years after I realize it was a terrible mistake. In just five years after 1995, I became innactive. I couldn't stand their lies and false promises. After that in order to support my family, I had (and still)work 2-3 jobs, just to get the basic salary. And all that due to WT's FALSE promises.
I was turned to the elders for apostasy 2 times by my wife. The last I decided that I had enough of the crapsh*t and just wanted to leave. As a result I had to end my marriage, since my faithful wife, created lot of turmoil.
You have indeed a very hard tusk. You will have to make your mind what you want to do. Perhaps the best think is to fade at the moment. But in my case I realize that within the WT world there is no real love. As long as you are in the Club and follow the rules, is ok. When you decide that you don't feel to follow that, then your life is messed up.
In my case I just didn't care anymore about their religion. Most importand was my peace on mind, and with clear mind I could plan my future and what is best for my 2 children.
If you need anything just PM