"I think Gill said it best; "one day comes and you can't live the lie any more without destroying yourself"." How can one be a hypocrite when doing what is necessary to save oneself? A sane and joyful life is what you are in line for now. True there will be difficulties and emotional tug of wars, so I highly recommend staying in close contact with those you know who are supportive of you for yourself. It is the beginning, you will now experience life and all it has to offer. Your eyes and mind are in the clearing stage. I hope your beloved wife will get past her fears and...well, fears, and relax and listen to you with an open heart and mind. It will be very, very difficult for her and she may not initially, but someday she will have to acknowledge the doubts she likely has herself. We all do these things in our own time. I send you possitive thoughts
hopelesslystained
JoinedPosts by hopelesslystained
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183
It is finished, or is it just beginning?
by IP_SEC inwell i am no longer one of jehovah's witnesses.
i had fully intentioned to disassociate myself from the platform today, but i decided that if i wanted a chance to save my marriage that i'd better tell my wife.
she immediately went to to one of the elders.
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question
by sleeper inok my friend is a jw (im not) we're both male and 16 and i am in love with him, i told him last year.
he stopped talking to me for 2-3 months, after he started talking to me again our friendship has been on and off.
he can go weeks without talking to me and then we can go weeks being best friends.
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hopelesslystained
first off, you are probably more infatuated than "in love" with him. Homosexuality is totaly unaceptable to jehovah's witnesses. His telling you that he is cool with it, is probably no more than a way of saying he understands. Any future contact will likely include his trying to convince you that the jehovah witness way of life is the only way. Whether or not he is homosexually inclined, or attracted to you is not the issue. If he is a good jw he will try to get you to become involved with the religeon/cult, and there will be no sexual relationship involved. Look elsewhere.
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hopelesslystained
hmmmmm, what are you looking for? there is some of both. If you want honesty and non-programed, scripted answers, ask away...
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5
how many here have left a bad (abusive) relationship...
by orbison11 inand how long did it take you to actually do it?
how did you feel?
how were you able to finally do it?.
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hopelesslystained
it took me 10 yrs and leaving the jw religeon, as they told me to stay, maybe I could save him. Hurllll.... I can give you more details if interested. pm me.
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71
Without the Internet. Would you still have been a active believing dub??
by Samuel Thorsen in.
perhaps i would.. struggeling with doubts of course, but going to the meetings and turning in 2 or 3 hours on my report every month like i used to.... what about you guys?
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hopelesslystained
No. Left in 1977. Raised a jw, but even as a child I could see things did not add up. Once I got mature enough and brave enough to think for myself and trust my own gut feelings, I dropped them like hot s***t. But, I did/do still have a few lingering fears and triggers. After stumbling on this site about 1 yr ago, I have found it to be excellent therapy and validation of what my heart already knew; that my mind had been screwed with. Sooooo, thank you internet and all of you posting here!
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Why do you post here?
by seattleniceguy infor me, it's mainly the money and the women, i suppose.. no, but seriously, i was thinking the other day about why i post here.
in september it will be two years since i left the organization.
i don't much care for doctrinal debates anymore, and i usually pass on threads that are concerned with he-said-she-said kind of stuff inside the organization.
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hopelesslystained
I like the shared bond as well. Also reafirms I am not crazy and alone. Both my wonderful husband and therapist encourage me to post. I am still, after 25 yrs out, a little paranoid. sheesh, the occasional flashbacks are the worst! But, under control. I post here because after the initial anxiety of posting I feel sooooo much better.
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85
What did you want to be when you grew up?
by whyamihere inas a child, what did you want to be, when you became an adult?
if you could, would you want to go back in time, and become what you wanted to be in the first place?.
as a child, i wanted to be a florist.
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hopelesslystained
Well, I didn't want to be anything. I just wanted to make sure I made it into the new system in '75. I remember telling myself over and over as a child and teenager living the miserable jw life, "this had better be worth it, this had better be worth it!" Well here we all are, it was NOT worth it!. By '75 I was married with children and a damm hairdresser! dreaming of what I could have been. A research oceanographic scientist.
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Why I am SURE we made to right decision to leave the JW's..........
by Latte in.
this is an entry i made into a diary from about 4 12 years ago - 6mths before we finally left.......
"summer hols have come and gone...... not one jw asked to play with my lovely children - sick people" .
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hopelesslystained
When I quit attending, many years ago, no one called or came by to even see if I or the children were ok. Except, for one elder, and he promptly attempted to seduce me! A very sad and sick group of people. It was very eye opening and hurtful. Even those whom I thought were such warm and kind friends, my door-to-door companions, made no attempt to ask why, or what might be going on with me. But happy to say...I now have true friends and family. Most of my natural family are twisted loyal jws. Hopeless
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Did You Ever Think The "End" Was Going To Happen In Your Lifetime"?
by minimus inalthough i was considered an exemplary jw, i never really could see it happening.
still don't.
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hopelesslystained
You bet! I believed with all my heart it would happen in 1975. I was soooo worried I'd be way too old at 25 to enjoy the paradise. I put all my trust in it during high school as I refused all worldly friends and school activities while being sure it all had to be worth it. I even got baptized that summer just to make sure I made it! Was my youth wasted??? You tell me!
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WHY DO YOU INSIST on clinging to the Bible as anything other than fiction?
by Terry inhave you made the same effort investigating the history of how scripture was written down, compiled, redacted and selected as you did reinforcing your jw doctrines week after week at the kingdom hall?.
if you have; then you know it cannot be factual.. there have always been agendas.
the people with the agendas needed to wield power and using an invisible backup agent was a great device for controlling others.. somebody is always insisting they have an invisible and mysterious source of divine information and selling it like hotcakes and syrup.
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hopelesslystained
I don't. Even though I was brought up a JW, I never felt the bible could realisticly be viewed as anything more than a collection of mythylogical history books. Written and re-written many times over. After all, doesn't the society teach us that history is written according to those who are in power at the time? Jeez, I wish I could remember the articles in the official pubs that brought me to this conclusion way back when I was a kid. Any help out there? or was this something I simply deducted on my own?