SAHS

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Posts by SAHS

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  2

  What is Ambient Abuse or Stealth Abuse?

  by Narcissistic Supply in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  http://wiki.answers.com/q/what_is_ambient_or_stealth_abuse.

  this is a very tricky tactic used by an abusive person to make you crazy.

  since ambient abuse can not sometimes be visible the victim may believe they are so bad and or are going nuts.

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  SAHS

  To “Narcissistic Supply”:

  Interesting points!

  “. . . fear of the unknown . . .”

  This is a big tool used, not just by cults, but by religion in general; specifically, the fear of the future (Armageddon), and the primal fear of death (gehenna).

  “. . . the victim is considered mentally deranged . . .”

  Now, where have we heard that one before? I believe “mentally diseased” is how the Watchtower organization formally considers “apostates” (any kind of doubters or dissenters) to be, as per the district convention manuscripts during the last couple of years or so.

  “. . . the abuser recruits friends, colleagues, mates, family members, . . . third parties – to do his bidding . . . to . . . threaten . . . and otherwise manipulate his target . . .”

  I have to hand it to the Watchtower organiztion – they certainly know how to perpetuate their indoctrination of and control over their members quite effectively by using (deputizing) other members to continue to do their dirty work for them; i.e., getting close friends and even family members to report policy infractions to the organization’s heirarchical system (elders and overseers).

  “. . . social sanctions (condemnation, . . . ) against the victim . . .”

  Yes, there’s nothing like the cruel shunning policy (now tightened up even more than ever) to deliver those “social sanctions.”

  Their methods might seem somewhat clever, but in the end, their self-serving tactics amount to the same thing – abuse is abuse!

  [I don’t know how to control the God damn italics and boldface on this mini-editor posting thing – it keeps changing everything back to all italics or boldface instead of just selected portions only. I hate computers!]
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  18

  i regret not getting disfellowshipped/da'd

  by Django_Unchained in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i'd particularly like to stick it to the woman who gave birth to me by sending a da letter to her congregation, though admittedly i wasn't part of hers when i stopped going.. say i were to send the letter to her cult hall, would the letter be read during the announcement?

  how does that work?.

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  SAHS

  To “Django_Unchained”:

  I for one do agree that it would be a good idea to send a very brief but concise letter of disassociation to whichever congregation you were last formally assigned, with a copy also sent to your country’s branch office – that is, of course, if your own heart tells you that it would be beneficial to you and offer a sense of closure. Every such letter has to make a tiny nick in the armor of the cultic persona of anyone who becomes aware of it – it must register on some level in their conscious/subconscious cognitive functioning. (Every little bit helps to chip away at the walls of the Watchtower’s little empire.)

  Some folks tend to disagree, saying that sending a DA letter would amount to a personal acknowledgement of the Watchtower’s rules and control (playing their game). However, I feel that such a letter could be thought of as positively and actively “standing up” to them, as if to say, “I dare to let you know that I disagree with your organization and that I quit. So there! Put that in your pipe and smoke it.” Such a sense of empowerment and closure is, I think, therapeutic.

  Moreover, the best, ultimate answer you can give to everyone, though, is to live well and enjoy life. (A poster recently made that point using the term “live well,” and it really struck me.) I think that is really the best option because if fosters your own self-esteem, which is very important, and also because people can see that you are happy and have serenity. It is better than either lashing outward or lashing inward at yourself through self-defeating thoughts and actions out of spite – the latter of which I myself have always had a tendency to do due to my longstanding low self-esteem combined with my insecure and compulsive nature. I am very recently trying to work at having self-esteem by engaging in positive thoughts as well as conveying a healthy pride and assertiveness toward other people. (Easier said than done.)

  I wish you the best of luck in dealing with your pain and moving on to actually being able to enjoy life. Take care.
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  106

  NEW BIBLE

  by The Searcher in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  the following is part of an email from a retired district overseer in the states.

  (source private).

  "the new bible will be released at the agm and i understand only two versions will be printed from now on.

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  SAHS

  How about the “Newest Light Centennial Version of the Holy Scriptures,” and underneath that same title on the first page inside the front cover the words, “Bringing new speculations to God’s one and only people for over 100 years!,” along with four-color photographs of the current eight members of the Governing Body so people can see the real origin of that translation.
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  14

  In your own words,,,,,,

  by label licker in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  please tell my thirty-six year old niece what you would tell all your loved ones if they were to go back to the cult because they wanted to see their loved ones again.. she was df'd at sixteen for being a teenager with an anxiety disorder, her dad had walked out on her and her family(2 other sisters) when they were young and never supported them or the mother.

  all of them had to live with their grandmother.

  after the last child left home, their father has their mother move back in with him.

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  SAHS

  “ She was df'd at sixteen for being a teenager with an anxiety disorder, Her dad had walked out on her and her family . . .”

  You might want to remind April that the Jehovah’s Witness have already dumped her before. They have already shown their true colors. Remember, it was the actions of the Jehovah’s Witnesses in executing the Watchtower’s cruel shunning policies, which they have imposed upon and demanded of their congregation members and family members, whether they like it or not – yes, it was they, the Jehovah’s Witnesses, who have already victimized April. And since she is apparently living common-law with someone now, then if she tries to go back to the Jehovah’s Witnesses, it is just a predictable setup for her to be disfellowshipped – dumped – again by the cult. It’s unfortunate, but she is just setting herself up for more emotional heartache by going back to the judgmental and abusive environment of the Watchtower religion.
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  64

  What was YOUR wake-up call before you left the JW´s organization?

  by Mr Fool in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  what was your wake-up call(s) before you left the jw s organization?

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  SAHS

  Being made to be scared about sinning against the holy spirit since I was just a little kid by my elder father. I thought to myself, Well, if I’ve already sinned against it and there’s not a damn thing I can do about it, then I might as well check out those “apostates” and see what all the fuss is about. So, I got an account with this site almost a decade ago, and started perusing the factual information regarding the history of the organization and its bizarre teachings.

  Actually, I never really did agree with their blood transfusion policy – even as a little kid, whenever I saw anything on TV about that, I would always root for the “worldly” doctors and governmental authorities. I always thought it was ridiculous forbidding people to accept whole blood products in an emergency, even for their small children and babies, who would never get the chance to decide for themselves if they died as a result.

  And, of course, all those dos and don’ts, which didn’t even make any sense. (Especially beards, birthdays, married sexual techniques, not having any hypnotherapy, not eating lunch outside the convention grounds, etc. Ridiculous!) Not so much any rule in particular, but just the sheer number of them. Everyone has to just swallow all those petty rules and just say, “Sir, yes sir! May I have another?” . . . . Otherwise, you know what – spiritual/social stoning to death.
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  59

  Was Your Leaving The Witnesses A Very Gradual Process Or A Quick One?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  for me, it took many years.. even when i would read all the changes over the years from the "truth", i still would ignore it and "wait on jehovah" and try to be a positive force in the congregation.. eventually, i just couldn't take it anymore and resigned as an elder, and slowly but surely made my fade.. what about you?

  were you out, in a short or longer time?

  ?.

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  SAHS

  “grumblecakes”: “ We suspended facing our own mortality and grieving our losses.”

  Actually, I was constantly aware of my own mortality since around 14 years old even though I was a JW in good standing since birth. (I’m 47 now.) That’s because I always doubted that I would be good enough to survive Armageddon since around 12 years old, and then, since I was around 14, I was extremely worried that I had sinned against the holy spirt. (That is precisely why my user name is “SAHS.”) By 16, I was pretty much sure that I had, in fact, already sinned against it. My long-time elder father would from time to time scare me about doing this since I was about eight years old. I went through so much shame, guilt, anguish, and fear that I couldn’t even bring myself to talk about it to anyone until I was much older.

  So, I didn’t get to suspend my own mortality for very long in life – it’s pretty much always been staring me in the face.

  The one good thing is that through my research over the last decade or so, especially on this site (it’s been somewhat of a god-send for me), I’ve come to realize that the whole JW/Watchtower theological structure is just based on men’s ideas and simply doesn’t add up under any scrutiny. Furthermore, I have been tending toward an open and non-commital agnostic understanding about the existence and nature of “God.” In the end, I believe that we are literally part of the universe itself and ultimately will return to it as more elementary constituents. (I.e., “dust,” comprising silicates, carbon, calcium, and other elements.)
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  39

  Does The Governing Body Believe Their Own Lies? Are They Deliberate Liars? Are They Using the Common Human Trait Of Self-Deception

  by frankiespeakin in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  when we awaken from the indoctrinated coma of the watchtower corporation and starts to see all the lies and half truths one naturally wonders: does the governing body really believe all the stuff that they have printed in their publication?

  are they so indoctrinated that they too are victims of the falsehood that the watchtower prints?

  and now with the grandeous claims that the governing body a lone are the faithful and discreet slave of god doing his will do they really beleive such grandeous bullshit?

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  SAHS

  “Laika”: “I agree with bluesbrother, you can believe something is true and still lie in support of your belief.”

  Depends in what context a person can “lie” – relative to themselves or to others.

  If (theoretically, of course) I honestly and completely believe that I am from the planet “Poopiepants,” and I tell you that I am from the planet Poopiepants, then technically I’m not really “lying” in the classic sense of lying. Even though it’s not actually and literally true that I’m from the planet Poopiepants, if I consciously believe that I am, then I’m not “lying” to you as far as myself is concerned, because I’m not consciously lying to myself. (Don’t bother looking for “Poopiepants” on Wikipedia – I made it up.) If I actually believe that I’m from the planet Poopiepants, due to some enigmatic pathological condition, then theoretically I could successfully pass a lie detector test. (Or at least the classical type of lie detector test. I’m not so sure about the electronic real-time observational techniques used directly on the brain, such as the magnetic resonance imaging type – or is it the single photon emission tomography thing. Something like that. I’m not sure.)

  There’s the example of the alcoholic who, during his lucid, rational phase, says that he has firmly decided, just on his own willpower, to never drink again. Apparently such a person could at that moment actually pass a classic lie detector test, because he literally and absolutely believes his own convictions. But by his eventual and predictable relapse, he will end up betraying his own tangible and literal perception of reality as to the development of his future course of action which he was so absolutely sure of at the present moment. Thus, such an alcoholic keeps literally and honestly betraying himself.

  “frankiespeakin”:

  “These guys on the Governing Body . . . because they have to activate the mental defence mechanism of deception they force themselves to believe their bullshit because if they don't they know they will get found out by the other guys on the GB, so they all put on a show for each other in proving their loyalty to the cause . . .”

  Good observation. This really reminds me of those border guards along North Korea’s demilitarized zone. They are arranged in pairs who must stand facing each other. The reason for this is that if one of those guards starts to have any ideas about defecting and making a run for it, his partner facing him will quickly be able to detect it and easily be able to shoot him before he barely has a chance to turn and run at all.

  It’s as though the members of the Governing Body are all in a state of checkmate with each other, and they must remain in-placing towing their party line, otherwise, if they dare to move out of line, they will be spiritually and socially “shot to death.”

  Psychology certainly is a fascinating thing – just what really does make people “tick.”
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  29

  What's Your Opinion Of The Personalities Of The Governing Body?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i believe the gb has typically been an odd group of men.

  this new batch, the faithful and discreet slave seem very impressed with themselves....like they are modern day apostles or something....or maybe it's just me..

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  SAHS

  “eyeuse2badub”:

  “Seems like when a generational 'changing of the guard' takes place within the WTBTS, the new GB guys get rid of the 'old-lite' teachings from their former GB predecessors as if to make the JW religion their own and create their own legacy.”

  It’s kind of like whatever the current ruling political party is (e.g., democrat or republican in the USA; liberal or conservative here in Canada), they just have to tailor-make their own policies and interpretations of law to suit themselves as their own unique contribution, or “signature,” into the history books for people to remember them by. (Kind of like carving their own initials onto the old Watchtower glory tree. That’s their way of ‘making the truth their own.’)
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  21

  It's yime for an introduction

  by HowTheBibleWasInvented in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i've been lurking a month or two and letting out a comment here and there.a few weeks ago someone asked if i had formally introduced myself.

  i was born and raised a witness.

  i always found meetings borning and family studies so bad.

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  SAHS

  “HowTheBibleWasInvented”:

  “I have not left Jehovah's Witnesses... My wife is still in and.... what can I do?...”

  “I had never gootten in serious trouble. Ohthere was masterbation and alcohol.”

  Well, here’s a good solution:

  (1) Compose a very brief yet honest email divulging your true position in your heart about the real truth about the “truth” which you have discovered through your research and subsequent awakening – and be sure to include the links to your YouTube uploads. Save the email in your “Drafts” folder.

  (2) Take your smart phone/tablet/laptop to a nice bar/pub and have a few nice, bubbly pints of beer until the alcohol “courage angels” warmly come upon you sufficiently (thereby kicking out those stupid “fear gremlins”).

  (3) (This one is the best part.) Open your draft email, press the “Send” button, and viola! All done. . . . . See, it’s really as easy as “1, 2, 3.” Later, your head might physically feel a trifle foggy, but mentally and emotionally, well, you’ll feel like a million bucks! I say go for it. (Don’t forget: Number of lives we all have = only 1.)
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  34

  "Whether These Appear Sound From a Strategic or Human Standpoint or Not." - What do YOU think?

  by jw07 in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  http://www.jw.org/en/publications/magazines/w20131115/seven-shepherds-eight-dukes/.

  paragraph 17.

  "at that time, the life-saving direction that we receive from jehovahs organization may not appear practical from a human standpoint.

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  SAHS

  “label licker”: “ They realise that pedophiles are costing them too much money.”

  Maybe to control that problem they’ll come out with a line of children’s chastity belts to be worn whenever their parents drop them off at their local service group to work with a “mature” elder or pioneer on Saturday morning.