THE ULTIMATUM is about to be thrown.............

by Buck 62 Replies latest jw friends

  • Stealth
    it would be very difficult destroying something youve built.

    She does not seem to have any trouble destroying what you built by giving you an ultimatum. If you don't live up to her ultimatum, she is willing to throw the baby out with the bath water.

    And others are right, this is not being said because we are bitter, it's because some of us have lived it. Buf it you want to go down the path that many others have already, go for it. What you have built to this point won't be anything compared to when your life is half over and you see the things here were true.

    Best of luck whatever you decide to do.

  • mustang

    I think that there is probably more pressure received than thought given in the [decision making process for baptism] = (cynical laughter). That’s my personal experience.

    Of course times change; they didn’t have a battery of questions to go through when I dunked. And I was "sub teenage". And I did it on the spur of the moment; nobody asked any questions, I just "signed up" Saturday morning at the circuit assembly. And I wasn’t alone in that: somebody else from my congo went quickly downtown to buy a bathing suit, while I borrowed a "loaner" that the baptismal (rhymes with dismal) servant had on hand.

    Those were the days of real individual decisions; "screening" was non-existent . Maybe, just maybe, there is more thought put into it today; certainly it is screened.

    Fast forward 30 40 years: today, A, I know better and wouldn’t do it, B, I wouldn’t sit through 200 questions & C, while I wouldn’t get into a dispute on any of the questions that I deemed to endure, I’m sure "no comment" is not in the answer key at the end of the book :)



  • Honesty

    Your girlfriend wants you to get baptized...............then you two get married.............then she pushes you to get out in service as much as possible and join the Theocratic School...............then she is hoping you are made a Ministerial Servant...............then her ultimate goal is to have an Elder as a husband.

    It very well could be that your girlfriend wants "STATUS" among all the sisters she knows. Unless she can have all these things...............she will never be totally happy just having you. What you are going through right now with her always pushing you is just the beginning.

    I wish you well and hope it works out for your benefit, but repare yourself for an unhappy future.

    I just read about myself.

  • A Paduan
    A Paduan
    it would be very difficult destroying something youve built.

    You're on your way to jwism - ownership and possession (babylon) - inability to cut losses - it's a jw staple they'll rely on you having (until you can't stand it anymore that is).

  • Buck

    well, if I dont get baptized by looks like the relationship might be over.

    Looks like i will have a lot of thought between now and the end of the year.

  • lawrence


    Break open you piggy bank, get on a Greyhound bus, start in a new town, take a temporary job, and start life over - far, far away. Believe me, many people here wish they had done this before jumping into a mind numbing cult. I too was in love with my Witness raised girlfriend, so your predicament is not so far from home (she became my first of four wives). Think long, think hard.

  • jaffacake


    Thanks for listening. May I suggest you do some deep research into this organisation. I still don't think you appreciate what you are associating with.

  • Stealth
    well, if I dont get baptized by looks like the relationship might be over.

    Looks like i will have a lot of thought between now and the end of the year.

    It really shouldn't take that much thought to see what going down here. She only cares about you if your a Dub. It's conditional love. If you ever change your mind in the future, it will be a disaster. She does not love you for you, she loves you for the fact that you may become a JW. If she really loved you, she would want to pressure you before your ready. She is ready to break it off by December and throw away everything you have built because you are not on their time table. Be a man, break up with her first and find a girl who loves you for who you are, not what they want you to be. You may be sad now, but it won't compare to how sad you will be when you wake up this reality years down the road. How long have you been dating? How long have you been studing with JWs?

  • Buck

    we have been together for over 2 yrs and Ive been studying for about 1.5 yrs.

    I was slightly raised in the truth by my aunt. I then went to military and college from the 18yrs old till 27. Never went to a single meeting during that span.

    Moved back to town, introduced to this girl. Now this is where Iam at.

  • vitty

    Im shocked that your 27 I thought youd be 20 to 23 years. Whats the matter with you a 2 year relationship is nothing to a lifetime in the borg, you cant be serious !

    Grow up, chuck your girlfriend and get a life .

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