mitch says being gay isn't so much about who you want to go to sleep with as who you want to wake up with.
its definitely more than the longing for receptive anal sex, although we do long for it so.
there is definitely an emotional as well as physical sensation to giving another man fellatio.
but its not the physical acts that make someone gay, its the response to specific stimuli.
i get a physical reaction (erection) from the smell of a man, a men's lockerroom drives me insane,
the sound of a deep voice, the sight of large arms, a belly, a male shaped butt (which shape of butt
turns you on is definitely a clue), a bearded face. my body is oriented to react to these stimuli.
its fascinating to me that there is such a range of look and behavior to gay men from stereotypical
masculine to stereotypical feminine and everywhere in between. yet we all react to the same physical
stimuli.
as far at the test:
just go clang clang clang and if the guys sings "went the trolley" and does jazz hands then he is gay.
no seriously, i watch for certain expressive hand movements and the way they hold their heads when
they are talking.
with bears it is tougher since they either don't have the habits or have worked hard to bury them. so I
just flirt with everyone I am attracted to and if they flirt back then cool.
they gay world has changed so much in the last 20 years since I have been paying attention to it.
it is greatly subdivided. it is pretty easy to find other gay people. there are 45,000 bears on the biggest
bear site on the web from all over the world.
want to meet a bear from Seattle to hang out with, just type in Seattle and poof (no pun intended) you
can find the names and pictures of 1000 guys.