"If I had all the money in the world I would.........."

by anewme 61 Replies latest jw friends

  • katiekitten
    katiekitten


    yea, Terry. You are so good looking in your picture, but your post was so boring it makes it hard for me to fancy you .

    Now a worldwide apostofest - that would be FANTASTIC! Id be really curious to see how many of us there were, and whether we could compete with the dubs.

    We wouldnt sell rolla cola (or whatever crappy pop they sold at your assemblies). We'd have a beer tent, a champagne tent, and a pimms tent.

    We could replace the drama with an orgy (a pretend one of course, where we all got to dress up in roman togas). Instead of opening and closing prayers we would have a mexican wave, and Sirona doing something wicca'ish. Songs would have to be Rolling Stones, and White Stripes (HEY - I thought of it, so I get to choose). And the closing song at the end of the assembly would have to be that scottish one where you all hold hands and yank em up and down, and are convinced you love the person standing nexto you, cos you are drunk.

  • confusedjw
    confusedjw
    and are convinced you love the person standing nexto you, cos you are drunk.

    *Going to be very careful who I stand next to during the last song*

  • Golden Girl
    Golden Girl

    Make education possible for all..encouraging those with desires to do something more with their life other than complain.

    Make medical available to all..

    Hire people to monitor the welfare system and SS system to do away with fraud. Thus allowing those that really need it to receive benefits.

    Do a full scale inquiry why no one seems to have been able to come up with cures for so many diseases..did people stop thinking? Where did all the geniuses go?

    Provide housing for those that work for and deserve it. Not those that become baby factories so they can receive more welfare for their boyfriends and drugs.Maybe offer them an incentive to become sterile so they can't hurt any more children.

    Well..I've spent that landslide..I guess I have to wait for the next one..

    Snoozy...

  • prophecor
    prophecor

    Disney World............MINE!!!!, ........All Mine!!!

  • prophecor
    prophecor

    One Classic After Another.........65 Impala SS 396

  • Apathy
    Apathy

    Fake orgy? Damn it. ;~;
    As for the drinking- can we bring our own Vodka?
    "Oh, hi de di de di de di di dayy!" That's supposed to The Irish Drinking Song from Who's Line.

  • katiekitten
    katiekitten

    Yeah, sure we can bring our own vodka, this is an apostassembly!

    In fact I just decided that instead of the burger booths they used to have, we will have vodka swap booths, where delegates from all over the world bring local vodka and mixers, and share the spirit with their brothers and sisters.

    Instead of the baptism we can have a pool party. The baptism talk can be repaced with a drunk telling everyone how much he loves them, he really really loves them, honestly, hes never met sush loverly peepuls in all his life..hic..

  • Apathy
    Apathy

    "Instead of the baptism we can have a pool party. The baptism talk can be repaced with a drunk telling everyone how much he loves them, he really really loves them, honestly, hes never met sush loverly peepuls in all his life..hic.."
    So pretty much like the regular baptism talk?

  • RubaDub
    RubaDub

    I would keep donating a large portion of it to the Society!

    For example, on the first day of assemblies, I would donate enough so that we don't have to hear repeated during the announcements, "Brothers, we are in a deficit ..... " etc. etc.

    By also eliminating the talks about generosity and giving more, that would probably cut about a third or time for the assembly, reducing a three day assembly to two! Maybe cut the service meetings down from 45 to 30 minutes!

    Rub a Dub

  • lonelysheep
    lonelysheep

    I don't know where to begin!

    I'd live in Hawaii for starters. I miss it!

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