Did you ever feel like you never fit in? (page 4)

prophecor

I remember being virtual strangers with many, the few I found that were honest were seemingly regarded as dangerous, or maybe bad associations, ammongst our own brotherhood. And they were the ones who I felt most comfortable with. One was an alleged lush, a sweet sister who I miss to this moment, some of the others were an entire flock of non-practicing glaring homosexuals. I didn't need to pretend to be a whollier than who witness wanna' be. I detested being in the company of those who flagrantly put on aires. " Am I putting on aires? "

mrsjones5

Yep, I felt like that most of the time I was in the madness.

Josie

tsunami_rid3r

I haven't felt like I've been a part of anything throughout my life, the kingdom hall, school, maybe work. this poem is about me.

goin where i dont belong
lost and lonely i walk
cause im an empty shell
looking for my spirit
going and coming through
a repeat of this and that
will we ever learn
im just a dying soul
and i want to let go
cause im a ghost
in a world full of spirit
never ever want to live
this way i want
i want it back ever so

greendawn

I didn't fit in because they were socially an impenetrable society and I felt they were like degraded human robots that lost their dignity by not claiming a right to question and criticise the GB rather than be the proverbial yesmen.

rebel8

Did anybody else feel like that growing up?

Yes. I was catholic until about age 7, and had a very happy/normal life up until then. Then everything changed. I had a taste of normalcy and happiness and always longed to have it back. I used to secretly hope my parents would divorce and the judge would make me live with my dad, so I could have an excuse not to be a jw.

I didn't fit in with the cong crowd most of the time because I had an unbelieving dad, and you know what a stigma that is among jws. I was at the bottom of the social pecking order.

Everything else you described is very similar to me.

LouBelle

I was pretty much liked by everyone, was kinda popular, and I got on with most. But I'm naturally like that - easy going, easy to talk too, like having fun......However the thing is that I asked so many questions, thought I was the only one that did and from that point of view I knew I didn't fit in. Everyone else just nodded in agreement. So I had to keep my thoughts pretty much to myself. As I got older the more I saw how wrong they were, the more I started withdrawing myself, this was probably an atempt to make the final 'cutting' less painful.

ima sinner

my mom was baptized in 1975 thesame year i was born. my dad was loved beer more than god so being a witness was never an option. i was baptized 6-7-89 and df 'd at 19. i have 2 brothers both that were df 'd as well while, 1 is reinstated and 2 of us not. we lived in ky, the congregation small and close to each other we were the bad kids that nobody wanted their kids to hang out with and hated us if they had daughters. so i never really fit in with the parents.

sonnyboy

Did you ever feel like you never fit in?

I've never felt like I fit in anywhere. I'm the type who often says anything that comes to mind, which makes some people uncomfortable. I also tend to look for the opposite point of view of the majority because I can't stand the group mentality.

I did manage to snag a few close friends who put up with me, so I'm grateful for that. I'm also extremely grateful that they're not Jehovah's Witnesses.

blondie

No one every fits into the whole group; that is why there are cliches, smaller in groups that battle each other for prominence in the KH. If you aren't part of a cliche, form your own.

Blondie

Jahna

I never fit in. For one, as a child through my teens I always got along better with boys. They always were more interesting. When my parents went back to the JW’s when I was a teen, I found out, a girl can’t hang out with boys, that’s bad. I had little to nothing in common with girls who ignored me anyways.

I tried having friends of my own sex, had a couple but it wasn’t all that close. Near the middle to end of my career as a JW, I honestly felt as if God himself was keeping me from finding friendship in the congregation because I was such a bad person! I always found excuses for the JW’s, I was to young, old, not part of the family ect, till finally it was all my fault.

Now that I am out, I still get along far better with men then I do with women. I just can’t sit around and talk about kids and dance music all day like many of the ladies around me. At least now, I can talk to a man and not get in trouble for it. Though, I still have a very very hard time making friends. I have to admit in that part of my life the JW's screwed me up royally.

Jahna

Did you ever feel like you never fit in?

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