We walked out of my mom's memorial service

by tyydyy 120 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  LittleToe

  Tim:
  This is definitely going to be an interesting one. I'll be "watching that space"!
  Thanks for keeping us updated. I'm sure the whole thing is emotionally draining for you.

  Scully:

  It seems to me that the Christian thing to do when a person requires "clarification" in a dilemma of this sort would be to err on the side of LOVE and COMPASSION - as opposed to erring on the side of heartless cruelty.

  I often question why this is the case. Honestly, Elder's meetings were a real showcase of reprobates...

  Danny:

  I truly believe that this kind of conduct binds the jdubs together more than any other activity.

  So true. As I said to my dad, earlier this year, "it's beyond sad, it's sick!"

  Beebee:Welcome to the world of cults.
  I'm glad you're there to help support Tim through all of this. It's a Twilight Zone of mental abuse. You're lucky he's still in one piece.
• 

  Black Sheep

  I'm sorry I have taken so long to respond to this, but it really has taken my breath away.

  I have not struck anything like this within my mainly JW family who have large funerals and anniversaries with all welcome and included. I guess I can count myself lucky.

  Maybe my family is weak in 'the faith'. I hope so.

  My heart goes out to you all. I have been thinking about you ever since I read the first posts.

  God bless you all, and your Mum

  Love

  Chris
• 

  tyydyy

  Last Night I called the guy who gave the memorial talk, my dad's best friend. William F. Rutherford. I talked to him for about an hour and a half. I don't have time right now to give all the details but I will later. As we were hanging up he said that he wished that he could some how be in my shoes for a while so he could feel what I feel and empathize with me better. I told him: "I wish you could be in my shoes right now. You deserve it." He was OK with the way that the funeral was handled.

  I'm not df'd but he said that I had da'd myself by my actions. I asked him which actions he was talking about specifically and the only thing he could come up with was that I haven't been going to the meetings. I disobeyed a command given by god at heb. 10: 25.

  More from the discussion later......

  TimB
• 

  Brummie

  I disobeyed a command given by god at heb. 10: 25.

  Oh my gawwwd, when did this become a disfellowshiping offence? Imagine how many others will be dissed if this is a dissing offence!

  imho he is making up the rules and causing division/sects in the congregation, I'd drop the GB a line.

  Brummie
• 

  LittleToe

  So they DA'ed ya in absentia, huh?
  Not that it'd do anything in the long run, but I would appeal to the Branch.
  What a bunch of control freaks!
• 

  Princess

  Perhaps you could send him a list of others in the hall who regularly disobey Heb 10:25 (I thought it was 10:24?).

  That's ridiculous but oh so very typical.
• 

  gumby

  I'm not a violent type or a troublemaker.........but reading this pissed me off to no end. I can't help but wonder if someone told me I couldn't attend something in my moms honor.....me.....her son, that I wouldn't knock their damn teeth down their throat..........bunch of sick bastard losers!

  Gumby
• 

  Dansk

  Tim,

  Few posts here upset me - but yours did! The treatment you and your family received was absolutely outrageous. A mother and a father cannot be replaced. No matter what we do the bond is never broken. I count my blessings that I left the organisation when I did. This type of behaviour confirms I made absolutely the right decision. JWs don't know what Christianity is!

  I hope you do use this story for the court case you mentioned. I hope you do go to the press.

  Actually, I finally feel like a MAN!!!

  That, my dear friend, has never been in question.

  Blessings to you and your loved ones - and manly (((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))

  Love,

  Ian
• 

  Billygoat

  (((((Xena and Tyydyy)))))

  T, I am so very sorry to hear about your Mom's passing. I know it's a loss that we're never prepared for no matter how much we think we are. And I'm so sorry to hear how the congregation treated you. It breaks my heart for your mom. If nothing else, this confirms that you made the right decision in not being a part of this group. "They will know his people through their love"? Right. This type of stuff makes me physically ill. It's so wrong. Your own memorial service I'm sure was much more meaningful than their commercial anyway.

  Love you guys,

  Andi
• 

  MegaDude

  Tim,

  I wonder if the local newspaper would be interested in your story? Or the local TV station? Why not give them a call and see. Might as well let as many people as possible hear your story.