When I first found out the truth about the truth, well, I sat in my chair stunned, my head was spinning. I wanted to vomit and cry at the same time.
My whole entire life ran through my head. Every part of my life orchestrated around this religion, my view on 'death' that was huge, I hadn't really thought much about dying because I had faith in a after life or paradise if you will. I believed god would answer all our problems and fix every undesirable thing. My marriage was a choice allocated to me by availability and proximity of JW girls. Is my wife a great person?, yes!. She is honest and loyal. I cant regret our relationship its just that it all seams manipulated by a organization by men, that I don't even really know anymore.. My kids raise in the religion of my youth, indoctrinated in the same end time paranoia that I was subjected too. I'm working on breaking the bonds they have on them but its a uphill battle with fanatical family and nosy dubs. My employment, If i could go back in time, I would follow my heart and pursue a degree in engineering. I'm in construction and deal heavily with engineers on a daily basis and am fascinated by it all. I'm to old now and have to much responsibility to go to school now, I feel I was robbed of so many possibility's.
It really has added so many burdens and unnecessary hardships on my life and family. I always wonder what kind of person I would of been, if it wasn't for this cult.