Did you recieve help?

by shamus 42 Replies latest watchtower bible

  • jayhawk1
    jayhawk1

    I asked them for help because I was feeling lonely and depressed. Their answer was to keep going to meetings and study harder for the meetings. The problem was, I felt my loneliest at the meetings and I was already better prepared than most of the Dubs attending.

    Life sucks when you are a single man and the only human contact you have says, "Hi, how are you?"

    And you answer with a hand shake, "Fine."

    And before anything else is said that person asks somebody else, "Hi, how are you?"

    So you find your seat and wait for the meeting to begin.

  • shamus
    shamus

    Exactly, Jayhawk. That is how the meetings were for me... when my anxiety got too bad, I was the last one in, first one out. Nobody ever talked to me, because I didn't want them to.

    It was too hard for me to talk with people, b/c I KNEW that they were the ones gossipping about me. I just couldn't stand it anymore, and decided that people like that were not worth my time.

    And lonely? I told Jehovah one night that I had had it with the lies and hypocrosy of the "brotherhood" and that I was going to get friends in the world if he couldn't provide for me. That is when I lightened up, and had all the friends I could handle... the "weak" ones. They were always the best, and you could actually talk to them.

    Have you ever had the displeasure of going over to someone's house and talking about nothing but theocratic bullshit all night? It is horrible. I got so dammed sick of it... they talk about nothing else. Then when you leave, everybody starts talking about everyone else. I just hated it.

    Yes, it was the loneliest place in the world... HI, how are you? Hi, how are you? Hi, how are you?

    Just b.s.

  • Dansk
    Dansk

    Hi Ozzie,

    Frankly, in retrospect, they've done us a favour, haven't they?

    I know what you're saying - but I think it depends on one's character. I can brush the Borg off like talc on a jacket - but others have committed suicide because of being DF'd or DA'd; others have attempted suicide but been found just in time. Still others are trying desperately hard to cope with depression and/or anxiety attacks. Me, I'm just looking forward to a great Christmas.

    I won't give the Borg credit for anything, even if it IS said tongue in cheek.

    Hope Mrs. Ozzie is well.

    Ian

  • Tinkerbell4125
    Tinkerbell4125

    Shamus, if I get into the whole thing with the treatment of the elders, I will just get mad. But, I will tell you this, no, I didn't go to them for help, *that's what made them mad* and no they did not help me.

  • ESTEE
    ESTEE

    My help came in the form of a reprimand using a scripture.

    As an adult I became severely depressed as I was remembering my suppressed sexual abuse. I was ever so lovingly told, "Anyone looking behind the plow is not well suited for the kingdom of God..."

    Apparently I was not "supposed" to remember this stuff as it flooded in on me...

    ESTEE

  • Sassy
    Sassy

    We all sure can relate to each other, can't we? Hugs all around the thread {{{{{{{EVERYONE}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

    When I went into therapy, I remember being asked what kind of support system did my religion have? Since most churches have groups and activities to help members, it was assumed that similarly JWs would have something to make it easier to deal with hard issues as they impacted us. I had to say no, we didn't have those. Not to mention I was being stressed at the time from the elders and their dealing with my 'mistakes' and so the therapist was telling me I needed to get another religion that fit better for my life. Of course my immediate brainwashed thought was, I can't see this therapist again, she is trying to turn me away from JWs. Unfortunately I wasn't yet ready to realize how much that was exactly what I needed.

  • Insomniac
    Insomniac

    When I was a child being beaten bloody by my stepfather, they told me to be more obedient.

    When he started putting his filthy hands on me in a sexual way, they told me that, since he didn't do it in front of two witnesses, it never happened, and to shut up about it or I'd be guilty of slander.

    When I ran away from home at 15 to escape it all, they told me I could not rent a room from a kind sister because she had 3 sons I might tempt.

    When one of those sons started looking out for me (he gave me food from his family's restaurant, some occasional work to earn a few bucks, and a listening ear-that's all) they told me to quit talking to him.

    When I landed a job so I would not be homeless, they told me my co-workers were bad associations, and that I needed to make more meetings. Requests for a ride were refused.

    When the doctors sent my mom home to die, one sister who was a close friend of mine came around to give me a break, that's it. No calls, no other visits, nothing. I brought her back from the brink all on my own, and again received counsel for missing meetings and service. When my worldly landlord stepped in to help us, I was counseled for being too "chummy" with a gay man-like it might rub off.

    To hell with these hypocrites, for all their talk they never did a damn thing to help. I owe them nothing.

  • Sassy
    Sassy

    {{{{{{Insomniac}}}}}}}}} wow. I'm sorry you went through all that.

  • Insomniac
    Insomniac

    Thanks, sns, but I feel like it made my decision to leave the Borg that much easier; I sleep very well at night knowing I did the right thing. I know I often sound bitter, but in general I'm one happy lady! Now, anyway.

  • ESTEE
    ESTEE

    sns wrote:

    Since most churches have groups and activities to help members, it was assumed that similarly JWs would have something to make it easier to deal with hard issues as they impacted us. I had to say no, we didn't have those. Not to mention I was being stressed at the time from the elders and their dealing with my 'mistakes' and so the therapist was telling me I needed to get another religion that fit better for my life. Of course my immediate brainwashed thought was, I can't see this therapist again, she is trying to turn me away from JWs. Unfortunately I wasn't yet ready to realize how much that was exactly what I needed.

    Wow, I sure know what you are saying. Most churches are very supportive and go to great lengths to provide "qualfied" help within the church community to deal with all kinds of issues. The jws on the other hand, seem to suppress the issues. In fact, it has been my experience that they enable the sickos that perform the abuse. The elders seem rather quick to blame the victim, compounding the abuse ... rather than providing support and safety for the victims. Certainly the elders are unqualified men. More than that, the elders do not seek outside help to ensure their handling of situations is healthy or even legal. Plus the brainwash is as you say, "avoid any kind of therapy that might indicate the jws provide inadequate support, as the therapist's only intent is to turn you away from Jehoover." I went through a time with my therapist where I said "I won't be back." I'm glad I went back, though. She seemed to understand my trepidation. My therapist really helped me escape in the end. It was truly what was needed.

    Touching stories here...

    We deserve to give ourselves a chance to be happy!

    ESTEE

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