You are welcome, boa. My biggest wish for you is that you come out of your current emotional turmoil a stronger, wiser person. The idea that CoC could have such emotional impact never fails to surprise me, never having been a Jehovah's Witness. But I have "witnessed" it enough, here, to know that it must be a very valuable book to help exiting JW's understand why their instincts have been twigging them - that there is something rotten in this organization.
It is certainly no better than any other human-led organization on this planet.
Welcome to the human race!