Newbie Introduction-or-How to De-Program Yourself in 6,456,129 Easy Steps

by 2escaped lifers 54 Replies latest jw friends

  • MonkeyPrincess

    Hi, im really new here too. I loved reading your post and i can totally relate. Im still in the dizzyness of it all. I was raised is a JW my whole life since i was born, my 'worldly' husband saved me from a life of lies and deceit, and showed me that this in fact was not 'the truth'. My family (who are very strong in the 'truth') have no idea i have made this decision, i dont look forward to confronting them about this, but i know i will have to soon, they will be crushed and im so close to them that its going to kill me. But at the same time, i cant imagine raising my 18 month old son in this when i dont beleive it myself. The post you wrote makes me feel empowered that i did make the right decision and that i am not the only one out there suffering through this, thank you!

  • Euphemism

    Welcome, Brandon and Stephanie! I'm only 21 years old, but in many ways, my experience is rather similar. I, too, was raised in a family that was a pillar of the congregation, did everything right during my teens, had 'privileges', etc. I, too, was disturbed by nagging questions, things that seemed illogical... it was a long process, over several years, of gradually opening my mind to recognize the falsity of the beliefs.

    So I'm glad that you've made it here! You are heartily welcome, and I look forward to your posts.

  • smack

    Welcome Brandon and Stephanie...... and MonkeyPrincess.

    you won't be disappointed here!


  • thebeliever

    Hello Brandon and Stephanie and welcome!

    I totally relate to your experience, and am so glad you're out. I hope my brother and his wife will choose a similar course as they are still in.

    I have recently freed myself fully, from the mental/emotional hold they had on me, even though I was disfellowshipped years ago.

    I would love to meet you guys some time. It would make for interesting conversations to talk about those feelings of really seeing the world for the first time. So many things seem brand new. There are so many things to think about and perceive with your new sight! For example, I was looking at pictures of the universe... I don't know the website, but search on hubble telescope and for the first time really thought about if there was life on other planets.

    We were taught that life is linear, god created everything and that only we exist in the entire universe, but now thinking logically about it, that just doesn't make sense...

    Anyway, welcome... the fun is only beginning!!! the world is truly a beautiful place filled with many wonderful people.

    Am looking forward to your "book"!


  • Gopher

    Brandon and Stephanie,

    Welcome to the forum!

    How dare you question the organization and use "independent thinking"!! Thinking -- that always gets you in trouble. Don't think, just submit to the Borg. They know what's best. ---OOPS never mind, that's what your family has been/ will be telling you. I have lost my family to that faith, with the exception of my sister. It is mind-bending how the WTS can take family away, and you have to brace yourself for the eventuality that it may happen to you.

    But life goes on. Without a family constantly trying to tug you back into the Borg, you may eventually come to realize that life is more peaceful without them (should they choose to shun you). Life is short, time is precious.

    I am glad that so many folks like you are able to wriggle free from the viselike grip that the WTS has on people, and come to a place like this where we can commiserate (a little) and celebrate (a lot) together.

  • dmouse

    Welcome Brandon and Stephanie, MonkeyPrincess and thebeliever!

    Wow! a flood of newbies!

    You've all got a lot of painful confrontations ahead of you. Bear in mind that the JWs you talk to are under heavy mind control and will NOT understand your descision. You will be judged as either weak or matter what you say. There is no honorable way out of the JWs.

    The ones that think you are weak will try to talk you round but will eventually give up and walk away, shaking their heads sadly that you have thrown away your lives 'this close to the end'. The ones who think you are wicked will just stop talking to you period. Neither group will listen at all to your arguments, your reasoning; it will all be dismissed as Martian gobbledegook or apostate lies. Logic and, as you say, thinking has no place in the JW mindset.

    I wish you all the best in your journey out together and hope you find many new friends 'in the world'


  • greven

    Welcome to the forum you both!

    Your description of that perfect JW household matches that of mine as well... my parents are now at a point that they know that life within the cong is often worse than in the the world. I am inactive and gradually convince my parents to take steps as well. It takes time though, and no wonder: most people have invested their entire life in and on it! Not something you throw away over night!

    Well have fun being here!


  • John Barleycorn
    John Barleycorn

    congatulations, you've knocked off a good few million of those steps just by doing one incredibly small thing:

    thinking. welcome

  • Joyzabel

    wow, welcome to all the newbies here.

    May I suggest you look up some good posts from the past by poster's named: AlanF, Farkle, JT, JanH, etc and experiences. And of course please read Crisis of Conscience by Raymond Franz. That will help you see that your decision was one based on facts.

    Lots of good help here. Lots of people been through years and years of "mind control".

    And yes, brace yourself for the reality of JW family shunning you. Pity those still in, we used to be like them. Be patient with your family. We have all the time in the world to help them out. There are no empending doom or dates to worry about.

    Be patient with yourself because as you have wisely seen already it takes many many baby steps to help oneself heal from a high control group. But <ahhhhh, sigh> how sweet the freedom.



  • berylblue


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