I'm getting baptized

by BlackWolf 150 Replies latest jw friends

  • Vidiot

    @ BlackWolf...

    Tell 'em you're "not mature enough" (for that kind of decision).

    In my experience, ultraconservative parents love hearing that kind of thing from their kids.

  • OnTheWayOut

    I want to say, It's not too late. There are ways out of this. You can "fail" the baptismal questions, but you would have to do pretty bad with your father being an elder. You could just stand up and say "I changed my mind." There are many ways to do that.

    But it sounds like you are informing us and not asking for our thoughts. Maybe you should tell your long story about last year. Many will read it.

    I think you stand a better chance with your JW parents as a never-baptized adult than as a faded JW. You will be able to get a complete set of friends when you get out into "the world." As a never-baptized adult, you wouldn't have to watch your back so much concerning who you date or marry, whether you participate in politics even as little as voting, sharing holidays and birthdays.

    But you sound like your mind is made up. I can say that I am a faded JW and I get by. I don't tell my JW loved ones everything I do.

  • westiebilly11
    Everything about your question raises issues and highlights every reason why you shouldn't be getting baptised. 'Probably? ...Before making a final decision?..Forcing me? ...No going back?...Play it safe?..Their bad side?...etc. These words and phrases betray shallowness and self deception!. The only reason for baptism is because you genuinely sincerely want to ! NOT because of any external pressure to 'conform'. My friend, I urge you to reflect on your own true feelings....otherwise you will certainly be making a bad decision to get baptised. Be true to yourself. Avoid deceiving yourself....
  • Sail Away
    Sail Away

    ((((Black Wolf)))), I'm so sorry you are being coerced by your parents. Isolating and controling you in the way they have through raising you as a JW and homeschooling is just wrong. It sounds like they are simply not willing to listen to you, but I want you to know something I didn't know for the first 52 years of my life-- you have legitimate rights as a human being.

    Please read and re-read this list. It is your birth right. You deserve to be treated with love, dignity and respect. Please believe that. Only you can stand up to your parents and say, "No, I am just not ready." This is supposed to be your dedication from you heart, not their decision for you. Please listen to everyone here that has said, "Don't do it!" The consequences of this one decision are monumental and life long. It is not too late to change your mind. Cults take away our legitimate human rights. We have to stand up for ourselves. It is hard at your age, but you can do it! We are cheering for you.

    Your Legtitimate Rights

  • steve2

    If your Mom and Dad can pressure you into getting baptized against your better judgement, it shows how vulnerable you are to pressure.

    You are unfortunate proof that those as young as you should not get baptized.

  • Anders Andersen
    Anders Andersen
    • Dad, do you really think I am mature enough to make such an important decision as dedicating my life to Jehovah?
    • Of course you are!
    • So you really respect my decision and support me when I would be treated badly for it, for example at school?
    • Yes! Your mother and I are verry happy you're geting baptised! We'll always be there for you!
    • I am very glad that you think I am mature enough for this kind of decisions. And that you respect my decision and support me no mater what. Thing is, I decided that I can't get baptised this convention. Or anytime before I'm 18. Please show you respect my mature decision, and support me no matter what. Don't pressure me. Thanks. I love you.

    Of course, this is the model presentation you can adapt to your situation. And it might not go like this at all. But talk to your parents. Many times, one of them is more sensitive for the emotions of the children; talk to that parent first.

    Don't fight them (back). Don't shout (back). But be firm.

    What you do or say when some guys try to pressure you into smoking? What would you do or say when a guy tried to pressure you into having sex with him? Watchtower Corp. is about to rape your mind. Your parents don't know what you know, and they are about to help Watchtower Corp. Politely, but firmly tell them to stand down.

    Please talk to some counselor not related to the cult, like at school or something. There is a reason you're out here asking internet strangers for help. You need help. And since we don't know you or your parents in person, there not much we can do than shout DON'T DO IT!

    Whatever your decision and actions, we're here for you. Own your own mind; you are more free at your age than most of us at 35.

    Stay strong.

  • jookbeard
    you can pull out with seconds to go, its very very easy to pull out far easier than the hassle of the build up to it.
  • freemindfade

    You have freedom of religion!

    That means you have the right and freedom not to have one, or choose other than JW. They blow their own trumpet as champions of religious freedoms while not practicing it with their own members,

    F-ck them!

    You have rights! start exercising them.

  • Incognito
    I know that getting baptized is a bad decision but I had an incident last year that I really, really don't want to repeat.

    While I won't speculate what the incident was, what makes you think it won't be repeated after you are baptized? If it was repeated after baptism, if caught, it would likely result in more extreme 'punishment' by not only your parents but also by every JW on the planet.

    I would suggest discussing with your parents that as Jehovah only wants followers that do so willingly out of love and desire to please him, would it be acceptable to Jehovah if you were forced into baptism due to their constant pressure and threats of punishment?

    As baptism is a lifelong promise and commitment to God, how is it that you are mature enough to make that commitment when you aren't legally old enough to commit to another person, or to drink alcohol?

    Your parents likely don't even permit you to decide how late to stay out or what clothes or hair style you can wear.

  • dubstepped

    If I remember correctly, she is home schooled and very isolated other than time she gets to spend with horses. I may be misremembering but don't have time to go read her previous threads.

    Just as her parents need to recognize she's just a child, so do some here. Your human rights or whatever don't mean a thing when your parents have your life by the short hair. She's in a bad position. She can't just tell her parents how it is and put them in their place, in all likelihood, without repercussions. It isn't fair for her parents to put her in a position where she MUST get baptized, and it isn't fair for us to do the opposite and apply pressure. She's a kid caught in a no win situation. Your rights as a kid go as far as those with power over you let them go, no list changes that unless she's willing and strong enough (how many kids are?) to exercise listed rights and get people in her corner.

Share this