How do you deal with depression?

by BlackWolf 62 Replies latest jw friends

  • OneEyedJoe
    OneEyedJoe

    Unfortunately most human coping mechanisms (the healthy ones, at least) really boil down to being around and talking to other people (even if not directly about the issues you're having). You being isolated as you are makes that really tough, but I'm sure there are many here that would be happy to lend an ear any time you need (myself being one of them) and that would probably help somewhat.

    I'm not sure what type of ED you have, so that may change my next recommendation - exercise also will help a lot. If you have anorexia nervosa, though, that would probably not be a good thing to try as it can quickly get out of hand. My best friend suffers from anorexia so I've seen first hand what it can do to someone and how it can twist your thinking over time. Please try to find some help for that, even if it's just a recovery support forum online for people suffering from the same thing. Once you're able to leave home, make recovery from your ED a top priority. People can and do die from eating disorders - it is not something to be toyed with. Your body (particularly your brain) needs food in healthy quantities to function properly - if you aren't getting that your brain will be impaired and things only get worse. Try to force yourself to maintain healthy eating habits and the rest will get a little easier (though it can still be quite difficult to be sure).

    In lieu of exercise, just getting outside can make a significant difference to your mental state. Go spend an hour in a nice plush, green park every day or something. Just sitting outside in a setting like that will usually lift your mood somewhat (and you may even make a friend or two after a while if it's a busy park).

    Definitely don't drink - you're underage for one, but alcohol will typically only worsen depression in the long run.

  • dubstepped
    dubstepped

    Who wouldn't be depressed in your situation? Realize there's nothing wrong with you, it's your circumstances. Eating disorders are often about controlling that one thing because otherwise you have no control in this. This is all on the cult and your parents. I second the recommendation of finding good online support for your eating disorder.

  • ToesUp
    ToesUp

    Keep busy. If you can, throw yourself into getting a good education. This will allow you to get a good job/career so that one day you can take care of yourself without your parents. We have a teenager that we are encouraging to receive a good education. Dad and I may not always be around to help out. It seems you can not rely on anyone else but yourself now days.

    It is sad that parents can actually threaten their own child. I wouldn't treat a dog that way, much less my own child.

    Sorry that you are struggling.

  • TimeBandit
    TimeBandit

    Tenacious:

    "Tell your parents you plan on writing a letter to Brooklyn expressing their desire to kick you out and you going through a depression stage. I'm sure that will make them sit up quickly because they know that their masters do not advocate kicking someone out merely because they don't buy the crap their selling.

    Moreover, tell them that you are on the border of suicide and if and when you do go, you'll be mailing a letter to the local news spelling out why you did it and what led you to it. But be sure to mention this in your letter to Brooklyn."

    I think that's a really bad idea. All that will do is infuriate parents that are already hard to deal with. The thing to do is not to make waves. Yes, stand up for yourself, but don't do anything to cause unnecessary conflict. If you try to stay composed, you'll show them that you are more mature than they gave you credit for...Ride it out and make your plans...

    TB-

  • TheFadingAlbatros
    TheFadingAlbatros

    Hi BlackWolf. You told :"Ever since my parents actually told me that they are going to kick me out when I turn 18". In other words your parents are blackmailing you. They are afraid for your future or for their reputation and think maybe that it is the best thing to do. Maybe the elders or other persons belonging to their congregation told them to try this kind of stratagem. Do not forget that you have to face people who are constantly educated "in the truth". Even if they are wrong, people who are "in the truth" are most of the time sure that they are doing the right thing at the right time. Difficult, if not impossible to contradict them, for the simple reason that they are not aware to be mentally manipulated. It will take time and some intelligent actions on your own initiative till you find the best strategy to deal with the strategy of your parents. You should find the right person to give you the best and most appropriated professional advice and practical help to overcome this difficult psychological situation.. I have officially dissociated myself from the WT cult,after decades of activity, regaining in this way both freedom and dignity. All the best and take care.

  • BlackWolf
    BlackWolf

    Thanks everyone, I'm going to try to stay more positive. I don't have any non jws friends or relatives I can talk to, but coming on here always makes me feel a little better.

    I would like to point out that I'm not going to do anything that would make my parents angrier than they already are. I don't want to be seen as rebellious because that's not what it is at all. I'm trying to lay low for now until I graduate and get my life in order.

  • naazira
    naazira

    I definitely wouldn't wait until 18 to start making moves. Now that you are under 18 there are lots of options available to you: take advantage of it (group homes, adolescent counseling, youth job placement). If you can somehow get to an emergency room you're half way there. Look up a united way number or equivalent. Best wishes and take baby steps. You're going to love the life you created for yourself.

  • TimeBandit
    TimeBandit

    Blackwolf,

    I don't know how much privacy you have but I was wondering if you would be open to Skyping? I would make myself available to you on Skype If you want. You'd probably have to do it when no one else is home, but it might be good for you to actually be able to see and talk to someone that way.

    Send me a private message if you are interested and I'll give you my Skype contact info...

    TB-

  • problemaddict 2
    problemaddict 2

    BW,

    Your situation must be rough. There is a silver lining. Many of us got out WELL past your age. Making friends can always seem daunting, but trust as an adult its even harder. Try to get ACTIVE. Especially when you are young, getting int he sun, and running, or doing weights or something like that.....can really affect modd and make you feel better. Will your parents let you join a gym? It can really make a difference. PM me if you like.

    In addition, just be excited about your plans come past high school. The world is your oyster! Lots of unknowns and fears.....but you got this!

    I really can't believe your parents already announced to you they are kicking you out at 18. What assholes.

  • rebelfighter
    rebelfighter

    With your homeschooling and I remember you said you had a part time job. Is it possible to increase your hours at work? If not would it be possible to have a second part time job? The part time jobs would be a source of new friends and get you out of the house more, giving you added activities and less time for you to think about your situation.

    The advise above is great make detail plans for next year just remember to stay out of trouble and stay away from alcohol and drugs.

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