by EdenOne 104 Replies latest jw experiences

  • The Rebel
    The Rebel

    It's a shame that debates can cause such tragic conflicts, And I think for most posters it's impossible not to become emotionally effected, when a discussion turns in to a battle. Some posters certainly make more enemies than others.

    The Rebel

  • The Searcher
    The Searcher
    So sorry Eden. Hope you can come back.
  • jookbeard
    hope to see you back some day bud
  • bohm

    I am sorry to see you leave. From wikipedia: on internet trolling:

    In Internet slang, a troll (/ˈtroʊl/, /ˈtrɒl/) is a person who sows discord on the Internet by starting arguments or upsetting people, by posting inflammatory,[1] extraneous, or off-topic messages in an online community (such as a newsgroup, forum, chat room, or blog) with the deliberate intent of provoking readers into an emotional response


    Viviane: However, it also allows us to see how forum members respond to personal attacks and give us a bit of insight into their perception vs. reality.
  • EdenOne

    I need to make this one post because there are some things that need to be clarified.

    1) Please don’t make this thread a “I hate Vivian” thread. This all started out because I advocated that people shouldn’t be personally atacked, insulted and called names on a forum where ideas and opinions are being debated, because that’s detrimental to the very pupose of this forum, which is to help people on their journey out of the Jehovah’s Witnesses. If this thread becames a venue for insulting Vivian, then it has become the opposite of what I defended and we’re not the better person.

    2) I never called for Vivian to be banned, that’s a preposterous claim. I asked Simon to do something about it, to not condone the bully, name-calling behavior, but never suggested what he should do about it. It’s his home, it’s not my place to tell him what he should or should not do.

    3) This was a personal beef between me and Vivian, and I only made it public because she publicly accused me of a serious thing, and I felt that public explanation had to be given for my decision to leave. I’m not trying to accrete a mob of Vivian haters.

    4) I never demanded an apology. Actually it was Vivian that first publicly demanded an apology from me. I asked for a retraction of the ridiculous public accusation of calling me a liar and a hypocrite.

    5) By leaving, I would like to raise awareness about the type of behavior, not the person in question.

    6) Simon, when you’re in your position, you can’t please everyone everytime. Criticism comes with the territory, and if I mildly criticized you, at least I was loyal when I did it.

    7) I have been twice the chairman of two associations of professionals in my business area. My management work was entirely pro-bono for the benefit of dozens of colleagues. Believe me, I appreciate what Simon is doing for all of us, and I know what it feels like to work for the benefit of others, without getting paid for it, expected to be on-demand for others, and then receiving ingratitude at the end of it. Been there, done it, bought the T-shirt, and eventually stopped doing it because there’s only so much one can take. I hope you don’t, Simon. What you do here is priceless and no words of gratitude can ever be enough for what you do.

    8) In my offline life I had to deal with a Vivian type of bully stalker, for years, who created arguments with me from thin air just for the sake of winning arguments, and who did real damage to my professional life by fabricating stories about me (including forging documents) and spreading them around my professional netwok. At the origin of this behavior was that I didn’t agree with him on a strategy of negociation with the official authorities that regulate our trade. Simple difference of opinion, but he made it into a personal vendetta. Others knew what he was saying was BS, but because he was a senior, several decades older than me, had political connections, nobody wanted to confront him, or have him as an enemy, so nobody stuck for me either when it mattered. I learned that the only solution was for me to step down and walk away before my health was damaged. That’s when I found peace. This old man is now sick and alone and even his own children won’t have anything to do with him. That’s how bully, confrontational people end up. Because of his lesson I know that the best thing for me is to stay away altogether and let people like this to dig their own grave.

    9) To have one’s honorability attacked in public is no petty “kindergarden” thing. Not in my culture. Even if that attack is made on an online forum just to bring out an emotional response and test the other person's limits. If that's the case, then it's just a plain stupid thing to do.

    10) I was moved by the support you gave me. Thank you. Even Mrs. Eden says I’m silly to leave, that it’s beneath me to allow this to bother me. Go figure.


  • The Rebel
    The Rebel

    In my opinion, I think there is a distinction between how some treat being in hyperspace to how they would face to face communication. Hyperspace communication can also be extremely sensitive, and communicating in harmony more difficult.

    I would therefore like to take this opportunity to apologise to Oubliette for not adhering to my above words and allowing friction to develop between us. But perhaps more importantly although I doubt you know who Iam , EdenOne, I would like you to know many of your posts had a very positive impact on me.

    Take care always.

    The Rebel.

  • Bonsai

    I'm sorry to hear about all of this Eden.

    I understand that there are a variety of valid reasons that would necessitate leaving a site like this. But leaving because you don't like one or two posters is somewhat perplexing. I feel like you have disfellowshipped all of us because you can't get along with one or two individuals. I thought, leaving a religion that promotes intolerance would help us to be better than that.

    Why do you punish those of us who have treated you with nothing but respect and given you a listening ear when you needed it? Doesn't seem fair to me.

    The fact of the matter is, in any organization, company, culture/ town there are going to be those who are respectful and listen patiently. There are also those who don't give a crap what we think or feel. They are going to speak their mind without finesse or regard for our feelings. Some like to disagree just for the fun of it. No matter where you go you have to learn to deal with those people instead of running away. There isn't one poster in this forum that doesn't have good things about them.

  • Saintbertholdt
    I promised that unless there was a full retraction from Viviane only one of us would remain as a contributor to this forum.

    Hi EdenOne,

    This sounds like a bit of a tactic: Acquiesce to my demand or else...

    Well leaving for good, that's up to you now isn't it?

    Is it really worthwhile giving up being able to vent about the organization that caused us all such grief?

    Why don't you just calm down and remove the arrow from your knee.

    Then put the kettle on, and go and have some tea.

    Let things calm down a bit and then come back when you're ready to resume your dual with Viviane.

  • Marvin Shilmer
    Marvin Shilmer

    Viviane writes:

    Apparently Viv killed Laura Palmer.

    I always thought you were probably the one. It all makes sense now.

    Eden writes:

    Mrs. Eden says I’m silly to leave,

    Then stop being silly and stay. Having you here makes it a better place. Right?

  • The Rebel
    The Rebel

    What a privalige it is to communicate on the Internet, when in past generations that was impossible. But even today billions don't share that privalige. So in my opinion communincating on the net, is awesome and I have learnt so much from it. It's a shame if it comes down to the " the survival" of those with the most heartless voice.

    The Rebel.

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