Rivalry among the sisters

by Esmeralda001 51 Replies latest jw experiences

  • LongHairGal

    Hi Esmeralda:

    Sorry you are seeing first hand how jealous and spiteful Jehovah's Witness women are! So, I guess the "love bombing" phase is truly over in your case and now they are circling you for the kill.

    The thing that should stand out to you (among other posts here - especially Life is too Short's post) is how there is an ABSENCE OF BOUNDARIES among Witnesses - especially among the women.

    As might have been mentioned on other threads, a person's financial status is NOBODY's business - as is the related question "How much did that cost you? Or "Is that new?".

    Witnesses have their boundaries and sensibilities slowly eroded. The unnatural cult of "Confession" prevails and pretty soon your life (especially a single sister) is an open book and anybody can come along and tear out a page. So, not only do these bastards know your business, but you're getting an unwanted feedback - and they're telling you YOUR business. Imagine the nerve of somebody commenting on a TV that somebody has in their home! Well, why is everybody up your posterior?? You allowed it, slowly but surely.

    This blabbing of the business (financial) leads to bad things: people lending money that the unaccountable bastards will never give back! And, also "Affinity Fraud"... certain unscrupulous people in high control groups, etc. convince gullible people to invest their savings in risky things. Guess who loses?

    This is the evolution of what goes on in groups where people have no personal boundaries! Most of us had nobody to spell out what will go wrong if we joined such groups, so, learn a lesson, dear!

  • sparrowdown
    Yep, sisters can be bitches. (PC enough for you?)
  • daringhart13

    Jehovah's Witnesses are a collection ground for people like these 'sisters.'

    As an elder, nothing was more time consuming or brutal then dealing with all the petty fighting among 'women of god'

  • Giordano

    We all knew any number of sisters that were a better class of people then any number of brothers.

    However sister's are in a separate class from the brothers. They are forbidden to do the 'serious' work of the congregation. Given no opportunities to serve as Elders, helping to conduct meetings. Giving public talks, leading a mixed group in field service, Serving at Bethel. Appointed to the Branch. Service based on their abilities not their gender.

    How do you grow as a JW without the opportunity to stretch your abilities? How banal the meetings must be for the sisters. What does this segregation from important matters do to their confidence? Even in their marriages their is no equality.

    However when it comes to matching the brothers in pettiness they are their equal or far better at it. But a big part of that is because of the disrespect the Society has for them.

    I think there are a lot of self hating women who need to look down at other woman.

    The average JW female is so far out of today's opportunities for skilled females that it's a sad take on who and what they've allowed themselves to become.

  • tornapart
    My sister came back to all this after many years out. She now says to me she understands why she left in the first place. She still wants to stick to it all but now she is very careful who she chooses as her friends. Not everyone is the same. Like me she feels it's best to chose those you can trust, who are non-judgemental and are caring. Genuine ones like this do exist and they are to be treasured. They won't look down on you, gossip about you, patronize you or judge you. Admitted they are few and far between but they are precious. If you can find them then everyone else can be forgotten and ignored. Just don't let these competitive, self-righteous women get to you. Think of those in your life who give you pleasure and joy and stick to them, forget everyone else. You owe them nothing.
  • RetiredLE

    The ingrained 'class system' that permeates this organization like a Pyramid, from "GB Member" down , would be laughable if not so destructive.

    As I awakened, it became a source of frustration, entertainment and then shame, as I realized the part I had played in oppressing others, 'lower' on the rungs.

    Notice this quote from a 12/01/2010- Watchtower..Why Did They Reject the Messiah?.

    "There was another deep-seated reason for their adamant refusal to acknowledge Jesus as the Messiah. After Jesus resurrected Lazarus, leaders of the various religious factions consulted together and said: “What are we to do, because this man performs many signs? If we let him alone this way, they will all put faith in him, and the Romans will come and take away both our place and our nation.” For fear of losing their power and position, the religious leaders conspired to kill both Jesus and Lazarus!—John 11:45-53; 12:9-11.

    The only way to have any self worth as a J.W., is like a Pharisee, achieve 'power and position'. Even if it's protecting your 'turf' as "Elderette of the Mothers Room".

  • Beth Sarim
    Beth Sarim
    Highly, highly competitive cliques within the organization.
  • rebel8

    What's up with that, you ask? Simple. The only thing regulating their behavior is a flimsy belief in a supernatural being made up by pre-literate people trying to figure out where the rain came from. Their morals do not come from within. Their distinction between right and wrong is changeable depending upon momentary whims or impulses.

  • LV101

    It's like this everywhere in life - trust me -- it's not nice or fun but reality 101! One is judged by dress, social status, income, neighborhood, education level -- you name it and especially your husband's status (economically) --- he could be a serial killer but if the $$$$ are high - try another religion and use a different last name even there! Very difficult (actually, you cannot! unless your family are on the gov. body!) to go out of your economic level and fit in. It shouldn't be this way especially in a house of God but every single social structure you encounter has this going on! It's in every women's org. I've ever been a part of -- and you are treated according to which level (echelon you fit into). If you're husband is a professional you're automatically categorized and treated -- then his rating/level in the community. You are an automatic target by the rough necks. My saying is -- if you go out of your zip code you get beat up -- women do what is called 'leveling' -- they will do whatever it takes to (abuse, slander, whatever) get power over you and that's what the good ole gals (the 'Godly' women at hall) do to you with their evil. When I was studying they'd actually go to the store and hunt down the clothes I wore and tell me how much I paid -- like I owed them an explanation.

    If you were a dancer (ballet - btw/love it! - so was my child) you are looked upon as an elite having an opportunity to live abroad/travel/perform/whatever - they've not had any opportunity and resent the fact you have.

    One thing for sure if you're trying to worship with the witnesses and fit in is learn to keep a very low profile --- (remember that scripture about a showy display of one's means of life, etc.) simplify your dress code=tell the rough necks you had to put your good threads/accessories on consignment to pay the utilities/rent/whatever --- downscale everything or as others have mentioned there are halls where witnesses have a higher standard of living -- go to them if need be. Just have no pride but pretend you're a double agent! I know of a couple of witnesses who have to do this -- they drive older cars (attend poorer halls) and have a hall wardrobe - seriously!

    Learn to poor mouth it. They'll be more than happy to feel superior to you and now put you down because you are such an underprivileged gal -- if only you'd never danced and served the WT you'd been blessed more --- ok, maybe that's a stretch.

    The good thing about low-profiling yourself -- you won't have the good ole boys hitting you up for $$$ for lazy ones in the hall who won't work. I realize, of course, there are good ones who have a real need but if that happens you can figure it out. Otherwise they go around pimping for their favorites in cliques for $$$$. I could write a book in the short time I attended even with my bum attendance record.

    Have fun with it -- their evil and mean and you're an actress!

    Best -

  • LV101
    Sorry -- they're evil -- I didn't proof and was on phone while typing - not good idea/duh!

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