Question to shunned persons

by HesterPryne 76 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • reagan_oconnor

    I'm not yet officially "shunned" by my family; Mom has asked the inevitable, "how do you feel about our religion" question, and it needs to be dealt with. (I was dfed in '95, reinstated in '97, and then left on my own.) I intend to tell them that I love them unconditionally, that my door is always open. If the WTBTS changes their stand (which I highly doubt will ever happen unless their membership numbers drop drastically ), I would welcome my family with open arms. I bear no hatred or ill-will; that is what the Scribes and Pharisees did. They are cult members; they choose not to look past the rhetoric and propoganda that is pounded into them. I have compassion for them.

  • ladonna

    If that did happen, what difference would it make?

    I have been shunned over and over, and then picked back up over and over; but NOT this time.

    I bare no grudges, but the grieving was difficult.

    I have learnt one thing out of this doctrine. If there is no respect from those that are practicing JW's for xJw's and their belief systems, there is no love either.

    So even if they changed their minds....where is the love?

    What do we all have in common?

    What would a change of doctrine really change....baseline?


  • thinkers wife
    thinkers wife

    It is all so very sad that we even need to be discussing this isn't it?

  • gypsywildone

    In the end, it's all about CHOICES. You can blame anyone you want, but when does a human being cease being human? Where is the empathy?
    where is the love?
    I did a reverse df on my mother, who has nothing real to offer but watchtower love. Our child does not need to grow up with religious abuse & intolerence, having a grandmother like I had, constantly spouting watchtower robotspeak. too tied up in meetings to attend & recognize her scholastic & sports achievements. I won't settle for crumbs of "new light" in my life, or for my child.

  • LadyBug

    Personally, Df'ing and Da'ing is a cruel policy all the way round.
    And I look forward to the time when they change this policy (if they ever do.)

    The thing is the witnesses believe so strongly that if they go against what they're told they are not only disobeying Jehovah, but they will also be shunned and never reach the goal they are striving so hard for 'eternal life of earth under wonderful conditions'.

    When I was a 'spiritual person' I shunned df'd ones because that was a requirement of 'serving Jehovah'. Of course they tell you one of the reasons is, because if we did associate with these ones, they wouldn't see the need to 'come back'.

    Unfortunately as bad as we see the Borg, it gives many a hope for the future in one way or another, a reason to live for. Some are so tied up in it, it would devastate them to know its not Gods organisation. And its more humane to leave them.

    A good example of someone in this position is someone who's lost a 'faithful' family member in death. They then become the 'spiritual giant' themselves so they too are doing their best, so they see the loved one in the resurrection. I know of ones who have done this. There is no way such ones will leave until they are ready.

    I am not looking forward to the day my parents and family find out we are no longer in the Borg. But hopefully we can raise subjects that will plant seeds along the way.

    (speaking from personal experiences)

  • LadyBug

    Exactly how I feel

    have nothing in common, their still in bondage to the Society, and why would I want to fellowship with people I have nothing in common with spiritually?

    There is no bond there any more, nothing to talk about. I have found this even with ones I grew up with. They want to talk about their studies, etc and I think who gives a s***.

    I had one friend ask why I wasn't going to meetings. I simply told them they were boring, same thing over and over again. Her reply "we need reminders". That's when it really hit home how absorbed they are in their fantasy, and how little in common we have.


  • God_knows

    This shunning thing is so sad and hurtful, God did command us to put people out of the church that flagrantly break God's commandments, but He also told us to LOVE that person and keep your heart open for him should he wish to return.

  • dins

    I this thing has been beaten to death, but I just want to say how different congregations (and even different countries) have differing policies on this.

    My grandmother (who has been a pioneer for over 50 years and still going) was told not to speak to her daughter who was d'fd over 30 years ago when she moved congregations. The old one never mentioned it, funnily enough. She took it to heart and severed ties. It was painful for all.

    Just recently, after 10 years, she has limited contact now. But if the plan was to make my aunt run to beat down the nearest kingdom hall door, it didn't work. My aunt got worse. And even though there is contact, I think the damage has been done.

    But I said to my grandmother, how can you do this? Your daughter got baptised at 12 JUST TO PLEASE YOU. What do you know at 12 anyway?

    Now, my sister who was baptised at 16 is out and there seems to be no problem with my parents and grandmother having contact with her.

    I see no logic in this, and all I can say is that it would seem like the light doesn't get brighter...just seems to be directed any way you please as long as it suits you.


  • cruise

    I just needed to vent here, I just stop in and look around once in awhile.

    I would of posted before but, I didn?t want to cause any problems because I don?t feel the same as mostly all of you do about the WTBT.

  • cruise

    Lets try this again...

    I just needed to vent here, I just stop in and look around once in awhile.

    I would of posted before but, I didn?t want to cause any problems because I don?t feel the same as mostly all of you do about the WTBT.

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