What's The STRANGEST Thing You've Seen At A Kingdom Hall?

by minimus 113 Replies latest jw friends

  • undercover
    undercover

    A brother sitting in front of me at a WT study one time raises his hand to give a supplemental answer after someone else had given the main point. He gets called on and all he says is, "Same thought". He then leans over to his wife and whispers, "I always wanted to do that".

    Two elders got in a fight at a "congregation picnic" on the pitchers mound of a softball field arguing the call at first base.

    Some guy in a skirt and carrying a log walks in the hall on Sunday morning, walks all the way up to the stage, grabs the micrphone, and starts spouting some nonsensical gibberish. Two elders grabbed him and "escorted" him out. His feet never touched the ground on the way out.

    WT study conductor fell asleep during the Circuit Overseer's talk on Sunday, snoring enough to disrupt the meeting and have the CO ask someone to wake him up.

    Years ago we had piano players instead of recorded music. Our hall had 4-5 piano players that took turns playing each meeting. One of the assigned piano players was an older sister that couldn't carry a tune in a bucket. She was terrible. One time halfway thru the song(after butchering most of it) she stops and announces, "Wait, wait. Let's start over". Another meeting the person assigned was absent. The chairman said, "We need a piano player". The older sister jumped up to go play and someone at the front of the hall(not realizing how loud they were going to be) says, "We still need a piano player". Half the hall lost it. There was more snickering and giggling than singing during that song.

  • sandy
    sandy

    UNDERCOVER,

    THESE ARE SOOOOOOO FUNNY! THANKS!

    WT study conductor fell asleep during the Circuit Overseer's talk on Sunday, snoring enough to disrupt the meeting and have the CO ask someone to wake him up.

    Years ago we had piano players instead of recorded music. Our hall had 4-5 piano players that took turns playing each meeting. One of the assigned piano players was an older sister that couldn't carry a tune in a bucket. She was terrible. One time halfway thru the song(after butchering most of it) she stops and announces, "Wait, wait. Let's start over". Another meeting the person assigned was absent. The chairman said, "We need a piano player". The older sister jumped up to go play and someone at the front of the hall(not realizing how loud they were going to be) says, "We still need a piano player". Half the hall lost it. There was more snickering and giggling than singing during that song.
    These are really great stories everyone. There is nothing more funny than laughter in a supposedly serious situations. In good taste of course.
  • bluesapphire
    bluesapphire

    WOW this is a great post.

    Once this young brother was "disciplined" because his mom told on him that he was masturbating. Well, when he was finally asked to pray again at the end of the meeting he was so excited that he started the prayer, "We thank you SATAN."

    My husband told me that when he was young he was given a "PacMan Watch." His mom told him he couldn't take it to the meeting. Well, he took it anyway and was secretly playing pacman during the meeting. Well, he hit 1000 points and the watch started making this loud music announcing his winning. His mom (a regular pioneer wannabe elderette) was thoroughly humiliated.

    The CO fell asleep during our family study. We all just continued studying through his snores. Our poor girls. They probably wanted to start laughing but were too afraid of us. Afterwards my eldest said out loud the unspeakable words, "He slept the whole time...."

    Once this old sister, the mother of a very priminent elder and former CO, raised her hand and said, "Today is my birthday...." This sister was too funny. She used to cut out the picture of Jesus from the Greatest Man book and keep it in her wallet like a photograph. She would take it out and stare at it during the meetings. She acted like he was a personal friend of hers. LOL

    Sandy, do I know the person you were talking about (the know it all elder)?

  • minimus
    minimus

    I remember walking into the KH bathroom only to see scrawled on the wall Fu---- in excrement. We shared 3 congregations in one Hall. The English elders assumed it must have been someone from the Spanish congregation.

  • mattnoel
    mattnoel

    Another one...........

    When we studied the family book and the term Spanking was brought up, over here in sunny ol' England Spanking is a term for sexual slaps of bondage of some sort. Naturally the 25 year old brother having to do the reading of the paragraphs almost keeled over in hysterics !

  • Mulan
    Mulan
    The CO fell asleep during our family study.

    Okay.........name please???? Was it Elmer Manfredi?

    He did that on my Bible Studies every time he visited. He had a reputation for sleeping all afternoon.

  • archangel01
    archangel01

    This old sister died right their in the HALL!!!!!!!!!So sad, the Holy Spr. must not have been there!

    Also one time this stone cold drunk who looked homeless came in during the talk and made some noise etc and two guy removed him.

    That's about it for now that I can remember.

  • minimus
    minimus

    I know this wasn't at the KH, but what about the GB member dying in front of thousands of people at the convention. And so as not to effect the "spiritual food", another guy just went up there and continued reading the talk......It was LLoyd Barry, I think.

  • seawolf
    seawolf

    At my hall there was this young kid, maybe 9 years old or so. Well, at the beginning of the prayer, I just happened to glance back and saw him grab his dad's privates with BOTH hands and yelled out real loud "What's this? What's this?" His dad smacked his hands away and never even opened his eyes during the prayer.

    I had to sit down for the rest of the prayer and hide my face.

  • minimus
    minimus

    "It takes 2 hands to handle a WHOPPER".....perhaps, the dad was excited over the prayer.

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