Advice on Disassociating

by HiddenPimo 77 Replies latest jw experiences

  • HiddenPimo

    Hello My exJW/PIMO/POMO Friends,

    I am working on penning my DA letter and wondered if I should use it as a tool to maybe wake up individuals as the BOE will have to read it.

    Anyone have any advice on what I should say versus what I should leave out?

    I am not going to Fade as my family can either be loyal to blood or loyal to a man made religion. It's their choice and I will love them regardless of their feelings.

    Thanks for your help...(Anyone have a draft they are willing to share as an example...?


  • bennyk

    I wouldn't DA. The BOE won't read most of a lengthy letter, anyway.

    I would send a letter outlining a few of my concerns regarding the Watch Tower Society to everyone in the congregation(s) where I had attended (perhaps excepting the Elders). When the Organisation DF's you, at least everyone will know why. And then they may give your letter some thought...

  • john.prestor

    Why are you leaving? Explain your reasons, don't hold back. Don't make it a form letter, tell them exactly what they need to know.

  • HiddenPimo

    bennyK I like your reasoning, maybe that is the route I could take, my concern is I don't want to draw out the inevitable.

    I am not going to sit in some kangaroo court.. :-)

  • bennyk

    Don't draw it out.

    1) Send your letter outlining your concerns. (It will serve as a DA letter -- they will DF you -- but everybody gets to read it. That is why I would send it to everybody excepting the Elders.)

    2) Never set foot in a Kingdom Hall, again.

  • Tameria2001

    Back in June 2001, I had decided that I didn't want to be associated with the JWs or the Watchtower (my mother became a JW back in the early 1970s when I was 4. At the time I had written a DA letter, but I didn't send it in, because I was attempting to fade out of the religion. The main thing I brought up was how the Watchtower has shown itself as a false prophet. My mother became a JW because they had lied to her and actually told her that in the fall of 1975 it would be the end of this system of things, and she would be reunited with her baby girl who had died a couple of years before that.

    It was my brother in law who pushed the issues, and it came down to either being DF (was checking out a church) or DA myself. Looking back there were things I wished I had done differently, but it's too late now. I don't regret sending in my letter, because it did, for the most part put an end to the mind games that my dysfunctional JW relatives were playing on me.

    The ExJW Critical Thinker on Youtube does have some very helpful information regarding this decision, and it was something I really wished I had known when I made this decision. Here is a link to a few of those videos.

    These are a couple, but they have others you can also check out. I hope you can find some helpful information to help you to make the best decision for you.

  • stillin

    If you're determined to express yourself, and you are looking for other people's thoughts...I have always wanted to point out how stratified the Organization really is, considering how it toots its' horn about not having a clergy class.

    Start at the bottom rung of the rank and file. It gets lower than "publisher," there are people with "history," maybe they've been DF'd quite a few times but they're still in, there are irregular, low-hour publishers, unbaptized publishers, publishers who have forever restrictions on them. Pioneers! How many levels of pioneers are there? The more thought that you give to it, the more you realize how class-conscious the "clergy-free" organization really is. And each level is a measure of your worth and spirituality.

    Well, anyhow, that's one of my pet peeves. I'm sure that you will do a nice job.

  • slimboyfat

    Don’t do it.

  • APieceOfShitNamedTate

    I really like BennyK's idea. I would write 2 messages. I'd have one for the elders, and one for everybody else. I would probably deliver my messages through group texts. In the message for the elders, I would simply say, "I no longer wish to be recognized as one of Jehovah's Witnesses."

    In the message for everyone else, I would explain exactly why I am leaving. I would include everything that Watchtower doesn't want them to know. I would even send them the ARC "presumptuous" clip of Geoffrey Jackson. Sending 2 different messages will take away the control that the elders feel they should have over the situation. It will really mess with their inflated egos. When they announce you, everybody will know exactly why you are leaving. The elders are bound to see your other message eventually, that's inevitable. When they do, they'll probably wet their pants in shame. The C.O. won't be too happy about it either. It's the perfect plan.

  • nowwhat?

    If you have family in don't do it. Just walk off in the sunset

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