Boyfriend force me to study the bible or no marriage
My boyfriend, who is a disfellowshipped jehova's witness, asks me to study the bible for 3 months or he won't marry me (I'm a muslim woman). He loves me and really wants to marry me but he is doing a passive blackmailing: if I don't study for 3 months, 1 time per week, in my home country, and without him, there will be no marriage..
As a muslim, I believe the bible is God's word so I look at the bible from time to time and would be happy to study with him. But the fact that he is kind of saying "study the bible or bye bye no marriage" is really hurtful. And it's even more hurtful when I suggest him to study the quran since he asks me to study the bible and he answers a radical NO without even compromising. Besides he is saying that he really wants to marry me but he also wants to go back to being a Jehova's witness and this could make him want a jehova's witness woman and leave me..
So I need your help to guide me and tell me if this condition is in the bible in order to get married. Should I be submissive and study the bible in order to get married while he doesn't even want to look up some info about my religion? Or keep trying to convince him to compromise a little bit and look at some info about my religion which is Islam?
Thank you very much for your time!
MUSLIM WOMAN - I'm so sorry you are being treated like this from your boyfriend. No man who has real respect for women would treat a loved one that way.
Your questions : Should I be submissive and study the Bible in order to get married while he doesn't even want to look up some info about my religion ? NO you should NOT be submissive. Your boyfriend is mentally abusive and trying to dominate you. Dump this boyfriend and find a man who truly looks at you as an equal and doesn't dominate or control you.
Your other question : Or keep trying to convince him to compromise a little bit and look at some info about my religion which is Islam ? NO again. Jehovah's Witnesses do not compromise on any of their beliefs. You are beating your head against a brick wall by trying to convince this boyfriend to listen to you.
Hear me now - carefully- if you respect YOURSELF and don't want a life where your prospective husband dominates or abuses you mentally, emotionally, or physically , RUN LIKE HELL from a boyfriend like this, I don't want to see you live with regret. Find yourself a good man who values your opinions and sees you as his equal, not a slave or " lesser " person. You asked for my opinion- I've given it to you. What you do with that information is now up to you. I wish you all the peace and happiness that you can find in this world. Take care friend, Peace out, Mr. Flipper
Thank you for your honest reply!
This is exactly what I say to myself. But it's hard because I really feel that this hurts him too.. We love each other and I pray God to make my boyfriend opens his eyes about this extrem religion..
I will have to make a decision.. But it's complicated also because we are in a long distance relationship.
RUN LIKE HELL from a boyfriend like this,
Flipper is right , if you want to be placed as a second piece of bought for figure in subjection to this guy run like hell.
The JW cult is very demeaning misogynistic toward woman almost as bad as the Muslim faith.
His effort to blackmail into this religion is an honest indication of how he's going to treat if you marry him.
Hint = stay away from JW men even ones who have been excommunicated or disfellowshipped.
Yea I didn't really know about this religion so I let myself start this relationship. And I wanted to get married too (I want to live in the US..). So meet him and see that we fell in love was great for us. But yea he is really passively blackmailing me.
And as a muslim I know if you read the holy text you won't be extremist. I am a muslim and read interpretations from people who are fair, smart, and not focused on a patriarchal thought. I was hoping he would be like that but no..
We love each other.
He can't really love you and still treat you as he is treating you. He is in a selfish, one-sided relationship.
And as a muslim I know if you read the holy text you won't be extremist.
Must we assume then that there are many Muslims who are failing to read the holy test, or is flying an airplane into buildings or mass murdering people not to be considered "extreme"?
"FedUpJW" has offered all of the advice that you need to hear, yet I doubt you heed any of the advice you get here.
Islamists are a little part of the muslim population that is not smart and read the quran in a wrong way.
And yea I do read the comments of everybody and will think of it.
Thank you for your help
run run run. I am sorry this seems harsh, but the Watchtower is very harsh.
Do not marry this man. Please.