My awakening started at the first televised annual meeting. This was the first time I saw the governing body. I was expecting seriousness, even an air of strictness that would top the biggest ball-buster circuit overseer. But instead, I saw them goofing around, laughing, etc. While I was entertained, I lost a little respect for them. It just didn't seem very dignified for a group supposedly one notch below Jesus.
Then came the JW TV. Even more terrible representation by the GB. Will somebody give Morris a f'n haircut!? That poof on the back of his head drives me nuts! All the terrible teleprompter reading, forced gestures, etc. C'mon, If I was the school overseer, I would pull them aside and tell them they need "a little more preparation" LOL.
Then came the branch meeting. The famous tight-pants speech. And calling yoga pants "spanx" (which is something totally different!). I thought, wow, this is divinely inspired speech? Jehovah God himself wanted millions of witnesses to hear THIS? We worked so hard, bought so much equipment locally, the whole witness world is tied in to watch his hideous haircut tell us THIS?!?! Then he went on to bash young men who aren't appointed, vacations that aren't to bethel, etc. What a JOKE. There were sisters literally worried about the spanx they were wearing at that very meeting. I felt sorry for them. "No, no, I know that's what he SAID, but that's not what he MEANT". Sigh. Should I have to explain and correct God's spokesperson?
Oh man. I left that day like a six-year old having seen a headless Mickey Mouse on a smoke break.
I mean, some doctrinal things confused me all along, but I honestly threw that on God, and thought he would sort it out for me one day. But how can I trust the waters of truth when they come out of crusty old pipes like that?
I am still on the road to awakening, but I've seen behind the curtain from several angles. And I keep looking, hoping to see evidence that I'm wrong. But I think it's too late. My JW bubble has popped. When left to only my poor literacy skills, I thought I didn't understand things because I am kinda dumb. But now that I see God's supposed chosen ones on TV- I am pretty sure they are dumber than I am.