Roll call of those of us stuck in for our spouse or whos spouse is still in!

by BU2B 62 Replies latest jw friends

  • LostGeneration

    I just cant enjoy my day if my wife is upset, sad, or depressed. Its even worse if I was the cause of it. However torturing ourselves isnt much of an alternative.

    What you need to do is seize your manhood back from the b0rg, and to a lesser extent your wife. The b0rg can say all it wants about men being the head of the house, but in reality the WTBTS is the head, the man is just another enforcer below the elder level. Women "think" they want a Watchtower man running things, but at a very primal level they want something different. You MUST break the co-dependency cycle and be able to enjoy life simply because you want to, not because your wife says it is OK to be happy today.

    I'll throw a website out there for you guys who want to try a totally different method of improving yourself and your marriage. There is a free discussion board and a blog, but I really recommend the books for around $10 bucks.

    Its all about becoming a man that a woman desires on a very evolutionary level, and also helps you grow personally. It also will help you be in a great spot should your marriage end, whatever the reason.

  • goingthruthemotions

    Hello BU2B, I am still in due to my wife. she is still asleep to the mind control. our older son who is a teen thinks it a bunch of crap, he came to this by his own accord. our younger child will also learn as he goes it is crap. i teach them about the bible and Jesus. I will not allow our family study to be on the BORG propoganda. stricly the bible, when at the meetings I always show her the difference as to what the bible says and what the conductor is saying and how they are twisting the scripture. I hope she wakes up!!!!!! but for now i have to go the the circus to keep the peach..but note: she knows how i feel. baby steps i guess.


  • HowTheBibleWasCreated

    I'm still in due to my wife. However at this point (with all the changes) I would still go just to humerously see what they are really trying. I expect:

    1. The Governing Body gets $$$

    2. JW's become an E-religion in less then 5 years.

  • offgrid5150

    yes still in, mainly due to wife. Other family is still in, but had i not been married, i'd just have disappeared entirely. It's a sham religion. Going to the meetings and field service is mind knumbing torture to me. God help us. I can't do it much longer. Hopefully the wife wakes up with subtle clues and progresive conversation.

  • Divergent

    This thread doesn't affect me personally. However, it's funny to see 10 guys posting here whose WIVES are still in and no ladies complaining about husbands still in!

  • EdenOne

    Wife and a lot of family still in. My son is out (inactive). I'm still in trying to do as little as possible, just enough not to get inactive, for the sake of keeping family anf friends. I'm waiting for a certain thing to happen (should take place within this following year) to leave altogether.


  • Divergent

    Oops.. make that 11 now...

  • konceptual99

    12 - I am still nominally active but working on my wife and tryin to fade in a way that allows family relations to continue. I think I am going to have to push things harder though.

  • problemaddict

    12 and a half. BU2B you and I have spoke before. My wife continue to EASE on down the road. She is probably 80% out now. I catch her making statements like the following regarding our children or our friends. Also I too have a 2 month old infant. Luckily he lets us sleep through the night pretty well. :)

    "Thats because they don't know any better and are just doing what they are told"

    "I don't want to leave _____ with your mom if she is just going to show him Caleb videos"

    "The only reason I want to sit through part of the convention is to hear what our friends are being told about those that no longer attend"

    Its been 4-5 months since she has gone to meeting, but she misses the community and is not good at making friends or following up with people outside of it.

    Honestly man, you are going to blow at some point. Stress KILLS. You have to find a way to be happy, even in your circumstance. If your wife sees you sad, and CARES about why you are sad, maybe just let her know you are sad because you feel like you can't REALLY be open with her about how you feel. If she eggs you on, make sure you "bargain" what is and is not on the table at the onset, and don't give it to her with both barrells. Just "express doubts". Act like you felt betrayed, or you just want to be able to obey your conscience. You can even say you already know what you think and feel about some things, but expressing that can do no good.

    Do you really think she would leave you? Why not just read a book when you are at the hall? Or grab the I pad and play angry birds. :) Or close your eyes, and learn to meditate for that time period, turning off your brain.

    I don't know, just spit balling. You got to turn your stress down.

  • tornapart

    Hubby is an elder but I've been slowly fading. He knows all my doubts as do my children (grown). I go as little as possible but just enough to keep the peace. When I go I feel like an 'outsider' now looking on. I've let go of all the stress/guilt etc and feel quite liberated now. I realise that no-one else has any power over me. It feels good.

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