What is this new Announcement to take place in August?

by Quarterback 77 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • steve2

    Something - anything - to lift the growing apathy among the Witnesses. Perhaps something electronic or colorful or splashy?

  • 88JM

    I seem to remember a thread on here about a month ago with someone who had a "friend in high places" who also said there were even bigger changes coming, but not until after the annual meeting?

    EDIT - and here it is: http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/watchtower/beliefs/277270/1/Will-firing-the-DOs-be-the-first-step-to-a-new-Watchtower#.U3pZe_ldVp0

    Choice quotes and speculation:

    "There is general consensus that the Writing Department has "dumbed down" the public WT far too much. Awake! magazines have become even "dummer" - to the point that they are a joke and have no credibility at all with the public. It is likely that the two will be merged into one new 32 page monthly mini-magaziine designed specifically for the public. The name of the magazine may even be different so that it is not so quickly identified as being "JW literature.""
    Rumors are that the Governing Body will be expanded to 12 to better match the biblical magic number of apostles, tribes of Israel, etc. That will also reset the 'magic number' to 8 needed to get a majority vote to make a doctrinal change.
    My contacts have implied that the real changes will start taking place after the next annual meeting.
  • Phizzy

    We could start a new fun thread about what the title of the new mag may be.

    JW.org will feature heavily on the Cover and within of course, I suppose "Fundus Magazine" may be a bit too blatant even for the money-grubbing WT.

  • bigmac

    i think the august announcement will be to tell all the UK jw's to gather for a special weekend at a secret location in north wales.

  • jw07

    The new announcement - The Brightest Light Final Special Convention

    There will be 9 talks - and at the end there will be Kool Aid served, that has been prayed over by the Governing Body!!!!!!


    We Have Seen the Light!

    Will You Remain Faithful To The Very End?

    Follow Direction Whether It Appears Sound From A Strategic Or Human Standpoint Or Not!

    Are You Willing To Donate It All To Jehovah?

    Honour God With Your Gifts Of Gold And Insurance!

    A Feast of Drinking That Honours God!

    To This System We Say Goodbye!

    Let Us All Sip Together - Figuratively and Literally

    Now You Have Seen The Light!

  • AndDontCallMeShirley

    here it is, August's big announcement. Wait for it.....:

    An announcement will be coming in September.

  • Phizzy

    The September Announcement :

    " Dear Brothers,

    In line with the Biblical arrangement outlined for the Tribes of Israel in the Desert, each person attending the Kingdom Hall will be expected to provide his own "stick". This was an implement used to dig a hole in which to defecate, and lovingly, each Israelite took responsibility for this himself.

    In line wth this divinely given example, no longer will Kingdom Hall Management Committees be resposible for providing paper Rolls or other cleansing aids to Bathroom users. Each attendee will be expected to take responsibility for this himself, of course, Parents will care for their children in this matter.

    I am sure that you will appreciate that this is a loving provision from Jehovah to bring us more in line with the Scriptural examples He has given us, and it will free up much needed funds for our proposed Kingdom Hall building programme.

    Each Congregation will be expected to forward to the Branch a sum equivalent to that saved by no longer having to purchase such Janitorial Supplies.

    We are sure you will be pleased to work along with us in this new arrangement,

    Your Brothers,

    The Governing Body, ( and we send greetings from our very own personal arse-wipers). "

  • AndDontCallMeShirley

    And September's WT Study Edition will contain the article: "Sticks- A Loving Provision of Jehovahâ„¢"

    Followed by November's Study article: "Toilet Paper and Flushing Toilets- Deadly Snares of Satan".

  • Gorbatchov

    The King is dead. Long live the King!!!

  • Nathan Natas
    Nathan Natas

    Isn't it right around August when the WT begins suggesting that Armageddon "might" come in October? Jehovah IS the "Master Timekeeper" y'know.

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