Not sure what to do next

by magotan 94 Replies latest jw friends

  • Fernando
    Fernando

    A hearty warm welcome magotan!

    After a little more than 3 years on JWN I have yet to come across a negative or judgmental attitude toward gays on JWN.

    JWNers are generally very understanding, supportive, real and compassionate in this area. For this reason many gays are open about their sexuality and struggles here on JWN.

    The problem in your life is religion, not your sexuality.

    Religion is an enemy of human sexuality.

    Religion is an enemy of science.

    Religion is an enemy of spirituality.

    Religion is an enemy of faith.

    Religion is an enemy of God's message (the "unabridged gospel" or "full Good News").

    Religion is an enemy of God and man.

    For God's sake get religion out of your life! Not overnight, but gradually. It is an addiction. Beating it takes time. Spiritual healing takes time.

    It would be hard to find a big group of people that know more about Watchtower spiritual abuse and healing pathways than here on JWN.

    A good, liberal, open minded and compassionate Psychologist will be worth far more than their fee (one that will not pressure you into considering addictive Psychiatric meds that impede the beneficial effects of "talking medicine").

    Welcome to the start of the rest of your life - filled with hope, happiness and promise.

    I assure you the Watchtower is wrong about far more than you can imagine at this stage.

    PM me if you are ever interested in an alternate liberal scriptural perspective on LGBTI issues.

    Greetings, blessings and peace to you and yours

    Fernando

    South East Queensland, Australia

    PS - I am a gay friendly straight believer who identifies as SBNR (Spiritual But Not Religious)


    (Why do followers of the Watchtower religion call themselves “publishers of the Good News” whilst unfamiliar with the “Good News” according to Paul, Moses, Isaiah and Psalms?)

  • Gojira_101
    Gojira_101

    Magotan I just sent you a msg. Click on the envelope in the top right corner to read msgs :)

  • gma-tired2
    gma-tired2

    my son is gay. Some JW parents handle it better than you mught think. It is hard on all parents when a child comes outnbut for me it was because I knew it was going to be hard on my son. I chose him when he was dfed because I had to believe family is more important than "loving Shunning" that the organization pushs. I have spoken with other JW gays thru my son. They all have said it is the way they are born not a life choice. You will find others who support you here. Wishing you love and support.

  • gma-tired2
    gma-tired2

    my son is gay. Some JW parents handle it better than you mught think. It is hard on all parents when a child comes outnbut for me it was because I knew it was going to be hard on my son. I chose him when he was dfed because I had to believe family is more important than "loving Shunning" that the organization pushs. I have spoken with other JW gays thru my son. They all have said it is the way they are born not a life choice. You will find others who support you here. Wishing you love and support.

  • LoisLane looking for Superman
    LoisLane looking for Superman

    Your Life

    My Son, My Son...You breathe. You are Precious. You are Unique. You are beautiful. You are Loved.

    Now it is up to You...to Live...

    (((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( magotan ))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

    A Warm Welcome to You from The North Pacific

    Just Lois

  • finally awake
    finally awake

    Welcome! I have young sons, and when we were in the borg I used to think about what would happen if one (or more) of them were gay. I couldn't stand the thought of having to shun my kid. I don't have any additional advice, but I do wish you good luck and happiness.

  • whathappened
    whathappened

    A warm welcome to you. You have found fiends here who will give you very good advice.

  • Fernando
    Fernando

    Sometimes DOING nothing is more helpful than DOING something.

    The ignorant ruling religious clergy class are addicted to their spiritual blindness.

    They prefer it that way.

    They cannot be helped.

    You should not try.

    Do nothing.

    Just smile at them.

    Tell them not to be concerned.

    Tell them Jehovah is in control.

    Tell them to leave it in Jehovah's hands.

    Don't get into discussions with them - pointless.

    Show love, patience and understanding to family and friends.

    Only discuss LGBTI matters with "outsiders" who understand and won't betray your confidence.

    Like JWN.

    Like trained professionals (gay friendly Psychologists).

    Relax, take your time. Get information. Strategise. Make well informed choices. You are young and have a great future ahead of you.

    You can't let spiritually ignorant morons make life changing decisions for you. It's your life. It's your conscience.

    God's message (the unabridged gospel) to ordinary folk is in part: "come as you are, and I will live in your heart, and lead you to wholeness and peace".

    (Search for "legalism" in the Watchtower library. The great article, likely written by Ray Franz, applies equally to "moralism". Both are venomous and virulent forms of apostasy to which Watchtower religionists are heavily addicted.)

  • magotan
    magotan

    "Fading" doesn't seem possible, I wouldn't be able to go anywhere without people keeping tabs on me. Not only that, but a lot of doctrine and attitudes actually sicken and disgust me. I'm already taking a lot of flack for going to college locally. I'm a Junior in college (thanks to an advanced HS program) so hopefully I should be done in the next 2 years or so. (yes, people tried to persuade me to not finish) A guy I grew up with (also 19) got appointed as an MS, and the comparisons have started. I have no desire to Pioneer, and the time games they play are dishonest.

    Moving out doesn't seem possible either, although I can afford it, I would never get my parents blessing.

    Disassociating myself would give me the freedom, but my family would hate me. I've also gotten the gist that my dad would have to step down as an Elder. My brother couldn't change congregations while living at home; dad would have had to step down.

    I don't want to hurt anyone.

    --------

    I talked to a couple LGBT groups in my area, I got invited to a PFLAG meeting, and I have a counseling session in about a week.

  • Lozhasleft
    Lozhasleft

    Magatan, hello and a big welcome. I feel so sad for you that you are having to deal with all of this. According to gay friends of mine "coming out" can be hard enough in an ordinary family, to have to try and do this in a JW family must be hell on earth for you. Is there anyone that you can get 'on side' in the family? Many here have had to fade because of finding out that the 'truth' isn't the truth, and don't want to lose family, but it sounds to me as if that'll be difficult in your situation cos of your dad and brother being elders too, but it's worth a try. It's great that you found us, there's lots of support here and I do help it helps you.

    Loz x

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