Need advice. My inactive jw husband has been lured back.

by ingimar 93 Replies latest social relationships

  • wasblind

    Two or three say to take assertive action, the rest say to take it slow and easy and that is the same advice that got the Jews gassed in WW2- the ones who took immediate action to get away from Germany- lived, the ones who took it slow and easy, by kicking the can down the road (we can decide what to do later) got rounded up and killed.________Moshe

    Question: Why did the Jehovah's Witness take it slow and easy ?

    Answer: " The Witnesses kept right on preaching that God's Kingdom is mankind's only hope, and they did it there in the concentration camps ! Within Buchenwald, as a result of organized activity, thousands of inmates heard the good news."________Proclaimer's of God's Kingdom book page 664

    Bottom line: When some saw 1914 and 1925 pass, they realized the Kingdom took too long in comin' and got out of " Dodge ". And the Jews who waited on the Kingdom wound up as Martyr's in the Proclaimers book

    And I don't believe God loved those who escaped any less for doin' so


  • jgnat

    Hey, it's not life or death at stake here. It's merely the survival of a marriage. I have a lot of confidence this will work out, and I look forward to hearing the story. I keep track of strategies that work.

  • wasblind

    Notice the Exclaimation mark after the word camps.

    Goes to show the folks who wrote this stuff couldn't even wrap their own heads around

    some of the mess they wrote

    Anyway BTTT

  • wasblind

    I have to disagree there jnat,

    fightin' for your marriage is fightin' for your life

    Like you I will hold on to the confidence that it will all work out

  • ingimar

    I doubt thatt our marriage will survive if he becomes a radical and right now, he is headed down that path. When he returns from the hall, I am looking at a man that I don't know. He has this glassed over look in his eyes and he has completely withdrawn from me. If he starts spending more time with them, he will become increasingly withdrawn and see me, his worldy wife through tainted lenses. I won't live with a man who doesn't value who I am as a person but who instead sees me as flawed and corrupt.....We will see. I am going to try my best to bring him back to me.

  • jgnat

    Steve Hassan's writing will give you hope. The glass-eyed man you see is the "put-on" personality. Your natural man in hidden behind. Hassan's technique is to keep the cult personality calm and non-threatened, while encouraging the natural person to express himself. I have become adept at spotting the difference, and I can pretty well turn the cult personality on and off at will, by directing the conversation.

    I can also do this at the Kingdom hall with people I don't know. All I do is pick up on a personality trait, hobby or skill, and have an animated conversation about that. For a short time, they are animated, interested, alive. At some point they realize and snap back in to the put-on role.

    It's deadly dull to argue with a cultist in full-on mode. They repeat their beliefs over and over like a robot. I much prefer the natural man with all his foibles and interests.

  • jgnat

    Remember also the study article this weekend included an odious paragraph warning "believers" not to be "unequally yoked".

  • jgnat

    I've successfully shut down hubby in the middle of a cultic rant by using humor. I don't talk, I make faces. I make my eyes go wider and wider. I let my lips and jaw go slack. When I agree, I nod slowly using my robot face. He knows it's not the real me agreeing with him, so he quickly deflates. I might laugh afterwards.

    Maybe this works because he's reminded of the real "me". It's also a small jibe at the robotic quality of the WT personality.

  • whathappened

    Fight fire with fire. Give him lots of bj's. Step it up, girl...put him in la la land.

  • MrFreeze

    Welcome. I would do what others here have said to do and arm yourself with knowledge. He is only just now going back so there is a chance that flat-out reasoning may work.

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