I agree, Sulla.
Also, what Farkel said.
I will love you *if* you stay in the Truth TM, is a great example.
Just complete the sentence "I will love you if ... " That is conditional love.
The example of addiction is a great illustration.
Unconditional Love-How would you describe it?
by rip van winkle 239 Replies latest members private
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ziddina
I would LOVE [not unconditionally] to have you lubby-dovey types explain how one can "love" a serial killer...??
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Sulla
You could wish the good of the serial killer. What is good for a serial killer is that he grasp the grave moral danger to his soul that he has brought on himself (which is true, it seems to me whether you are Christian or not) and that he turn around and stop being evil. Then to take steps to help this to happen. That is what it means to have unconditional love for an evil man. I suspect it does not mean that you want to snuggle.
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ziddina
Gee, wishing for the good of the serial killer is really going to help his victims, isn't it...?
If I found out my hubby OR CHILD was a serial killer, I'd turn them in so fast it'd make their head spin - or more likely, I'd kill them myself, in 'ahem - cough' - "self"-defense...
I view the moral code of humanity - do not kill your fellow human unless he/she is threatening your life - as superior to any personal affections...
Plus, my own survival instinct would dictate the elimination of a serial killer from my surroundings - by ANY means necessary.
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still thinking
I don't see unconditional love as being something that has to be given to all and sundry.
It is reserved for parents to children IMO...that is where it belongs...to anyone else it is a privelage if it happens...especially if you are on the receiving end.
I think the issue of unconditional love and acceptance of unacceptable behaviour are being confused.
When my partner (alcoholic) was drinking. I thought I loved him unconditionally. I confused this at the time with putting myself second, allowing and accepting mentally abusive behaviour. THAT is NOT unconditional love. That was co dependency.
The day I decided to end my relationship with him because he would not/could not stop drinking and I was unwilling to live my life like that. I told him I loved him, always would. Nothing would change that...but I could not tolerate the behaviour any more. My love for him consisted of not trying to change who he was...it was letting go...and letting live, that day, it became unconditional. He had the right to drink himself to death if that is what he wanted to do, I had the right to not live with him. I am not responsible for anothers life choices, I have no control over them. But, I can still love them if I choose to.
Fortunately he did stop drinking after that, and we have been together for seven years now...and I still love him...unconditionally. But I will never tolerate being treated like that again.
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ziddina
Interesting, still thinking...
Thanks for sharing that.
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ziddina
For me, the phrase "unconditional love" is simply unbelievable.
My mind grasps the concept of "forever" much more effectively than the concept of "unconditional love".
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talesin
I don't see unconditional love as being something that has to be given to all and sundry.
Exactly, Still.
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fakesmile
unconditional love. ask a pet owner. when your puppy thinks that the sun sets when you leAVE the house and returns when they hear you open the door. no love that i have encountered has been as unconditional as that puppy love.
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caliber
The truth is this: love is not determined by the one being loved but rather by the one choosing to love.”
When you look into your mother’s eyes, you know that is the purest love you can find on this earth.”
Mitch Albom, ,
