New girl in town here for support

by joyfulfader 101 Replies latest jw experiences

  • joyfulfader

    The PI thing didn't work. Can't prove times or dates without 2 witnesses even with pictures and copies of electric bills in 2 names. And minors do not count as witnesses. Finally got a letter from my ex saying I was free...which I was accused of forging. They went to the accounts reports that my ex had been in charge of to do a handwriting analysis and decided that yes I had my freedom. Unfortunately for me one of the elders on the committee was out of the country in Europe for 3 months and it took that much longer to rectify the situation. Actually humorous in retrospect in a sick, dark way.

  • joyfulfader

    That is all ancient history. It's the latest incident. Abusive relationship with elder-recommended brother. Relationship ends and elder body argues about it during bible reading comments publicly. Friends listen to gossip and develop hateful attitude. Elder who recommended said brother verbally attacks me in front of everyone after the ministry school meeting. Elders stop speaking to one another and refuse to work in service with one another. The elder body was actually publicly divided virtually in half. The politics came out and the hypocrites became so apparent that I could no longer ignore the fact that Jehovah was telling me to hurry up and save myself and my child from the ignorance and hatred. After I stopped going to the meetings I got "encouraging" phone calls from "friends" telling me that I was going to die at Armageddon and it would be my fault when I had to watch my child die too because I was no longer going to meetings. Just because I was not at the meetings. Not because I had committed a great sin (I am not Df'd) but because the "loving" treatment I had received caused PTSD and the only time I had panic attacks was in that place called a kingdom hall. It's amazing the calm I felt after making the decision to never go back. So with that basic I am :)

  • tootired2care

    joyful fader - A very warm welcome to you, thanks for sharing your experiences.

    I have to agree with you the meetings is where I felt the most anxiety for as far back as I can remember. In fact whenever Tuesday rolled around my whole day was totally off; just at the thought of having to sit through all that crap made me sick. Enjoy your new freedom, and I look forward to hearing more.

  • cedars

    Hello joyfulfader - welcome aboard! You have come to the right place. Here you will receive help and support. We're a fairly mixed bag on this forum, and sometimes people can be rude or insensitive. If anyone offends you, try to take it on the chin and not let it get to you too much. We are all carrying mental and emotional wounds from our JW experience, and sometimes this manifests itself in our behavior towards one another.

    On a lighter note, I'm delighted you've joined us. Your experience with the local elders sounded horrendous. Unfortunately, there is nearly always a "little hitler" in every body of elders. Occasionally, there are enough "little hitlers" to form a JC, and that's when you get terrible situations like the one you faced. I can only imagine the stress this treatment caused. Still, at least it helped you to see the organization for what it truly is - a damaging cult.

    I found it interesting that you said something came "out of the blue" to force your exit. That's exactly how things happened for me. I think that, for many of us, it takes an unforeseen chain of events to wake us up to the reality of the religion. At least, that's how it happened for me.

    Anyway, welcome to the forum!


  • joyfulfader

    Again, thanks so much for the welcome. I know there will be differences of opinion and I expect that and in many ways welcome it. We were taught for so long that thinking for ourselves is from Satan, that to actually be able to ask a question or voice an opinion is reprehensible and I am personally thrilled to find a place where I can read about other perspectives whether I agree or not. I have witnessed a few posts that I thought were hurtful to the writer and I am sure I will experience that sort of thing from time to time but I am looking forward to an overall positive experience here.

  • 3rdgen

    Hi Joyfulfader, Welcome! You are right. You have already lived a TV mini-series. I'm so sorry for all your pain and loss. The way you were treated by the so-called brothers is inexcusable! It's obvious you have much more to say and I'm anxious to hear it all. I hope you find healing, peace, and love in your new life out of the WT$.

    BTW, remember, 40 is the new 30.

  • jemba

    Hi and welcome Joyfulfader.

    I recently got out 'mentally' at the age of 37. It is so liberating isnt it!! Im glad youve joined us.

    I love how we all have one thing in common.

    Keep chatting to us as it is great to be relieved of the burden and someone has always been through the same thing.

  • jemba

    After reading the rest of your posts I see you also had depression cured by leaving the cult and panic attacks that only occured at meetings, me too. Hard to believe the damage they have done but welcome to the rest of your free thinkiing life.

  • Fernando

    Another warm welcome joyfulfader!

    Please be assured that you are only an apostate if Jesus says so.

    The problem however is that he only ever really accused religious leaders of "spiritual adultery" (apostasy).

    You have seen religion's bad fruit and don't want another bar of it - hooray!

    You sound amazingly strong and stable after what you experienced - congratulations, your real life is about to begin!

  • JakeM2012

    Welcome Joyful Fader. Nothing like the comfort and ease of a faded pair of jeans,.. augh, jw. Interesting story, I guess the org. always has to have the two witnesses, unless it's slander, malicious gossip, defrauding, lieing, lack of confidentiality, etc.

    I left in my later 40's and was bitter about the wasted time/life of being a born in. It hurts, feeling so stupid as to how or why I would buy into their lies.

    Look forward to getting to know you better, again welcome.

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