:") Thanks.
Do Pedophiles deserve sympathy?
by purplesofa 149 Replies latest members adult
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sooner7nc
Thanks Shelby and Purps.
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AGuest
Can't see where we disagree, dear CE (again, peace to you!), except that perhaps I can muster up a drop of pity, while having absolutely no sympathy. That drop could come from, say, knowing that the perp was once a victim himself/herself... which is all too common.
Again, peace to you!
A slave of Christ,
SA
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talesin
knowing that the perp was once a victim himself/herself... which is all too common.
Hogwash - please prove this statement .
You continue to make broad and sweeping statements - are you an expert in this field? Have you worked in it?
This statement above is completely untrue. It is RARE.
I'm done with this. There are some awesome comments on this thread, but I can't participate in such a spread of disinformation. I do not speak to my pesonal experiences, but to me work with rape and incest victims, and years of research.
In answer to your question, that is why I am challenging you. If you feel picked on, maybe you should stick to subjects you know. Or maybe a voice is telling you these facts. In that case, it makes me question 'whose' voice you are hearing.
pphhhhttt!
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AGuest
knowing that the perp was once a victim himself/herself... which is all too common.
Sigh. I think you've mistaken my statement, dear Tal (peace to you!): it wasn't meant to indicate that pedophilia is the result of child abuse. My responses above show that I don't think that. It was [and was intended to be] a misnomer (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Misnomer), dear one. ANY time a pedophile was himself/herself abused... and many (no, of course not, not all, ) have been... is, IMHO, too common.
On another note I am not sure why, once again, something I've posted got you all riled... but perhaps you should consider being done, at least with me. I hope not, but I really don't want to be the cause of you continually being so "upset"... and you ARE a free agent, so...
I mean, sheesh...
Ennywho... again, peace to you, truly!
A slave of Christ,
SA
P.S. BTW - If you just can't help yourself and do have more to say, I've started a thread for that (so's we don't distract from the topic of this one). Just let me know if I need to point you there. Peace.
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purplesofa
I have been doing some research on pedophiles.
I have read some discussion boards where pedophiles "come out" on them.
It's very angonizing for those that know how harmful their desires are if acted out.
I see many that want help and are fearful to even tell therapists they are pedophiles for fear of
being criminalized, demonized for doing so.
While I found some of the stuff I read in their reasonings disturbing, I could not but feel sympathic towards them
with their different solutions to trying to solve the problem on their own without outside, professional help.
I did not know Child Pornography was legal in any country on this planet, that is something I learned as well.
I did not know that there are some that get treatment to have their testostorone levels lowered to help.
I did not go to any forum that was pro- acting out the desires of pedophilia.
It was mentioned how shows like Toddlers and Tiaras did not help either.
One person mentioned that there was a child sexual revolution going on which made my stomach turn.
I am sickened at the stats of how many children are sexually assaulted, and the lifelong damage and scars it
gives.
I know I see over and over STOP CHILD ABUSE NOW campaigns going on, while I am sure we all want to stop it
but need to work harder and solutions and awareness.
If we continue to lump pedophiles and sexual child abusers together is is very likely that pedophiles that
do want to come forward will not as many never act on their desires and like I mentioned many do not want to ever do that,
but they do question their own ability to do so.
For the life of me, I cannot understand why we have been so pre-occupied with what, who and how adults live their lives sexually and
have failed so miserably in protecting innocent children.
We have non-violent pot smokers locked up in prison while we are quick to let rapists and child molesters roam free.
I sincerely appreciate the input on this thread, from personal experiances to opening up the dialogue of this issue.
This issue is on the tip of every ones tongue right now, allot of chatter and celebrations at the convictions and punishment
of those that commited the acts or allowed them to happen, and the worse that covered up. I hope we are sprinting ahead
to protect our children, find the solutions, and realize we may need to be more open-minded about differentiating
the difference in being a pedophile and a sexual child abuser.
A special hug to sooner for opening up on this thread. I know that was not easy.
purps
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Lady Lee
purplesofa
These predators are very clever in how they operate. ..... It has no racial bounderies, educational, economical, etc
Exactly
Over the years I have counseled over 600 women who had been sexually abused as children. A few of them had parents that were not well educated. (intelligence has nothing to do with poor education or opportunity bgu tif you have a really low IQ you won't get too far in your education) But many if not most of the abusers had were teachers, doctors, one was a judge, mostly middle class educated people who had enough intelligence to know right from wrong. And really I have also worked with a few mentally challenged people and they too know the difference between right and wrong.
Thanks purps
Some studies have shown that most sexual predators of have abused upwards of 70 kids before they are caught. You don't do that unless you are smart.
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Lady Lee
Knowsnothing
Can a non-practicing pedophile talk to someone about this? Not in the society we live in.
If a person had come into my office and said he had those feelings but had never acted on them and wanted help then the therapist has nothing to report to anyone.
If he (or she) came in and said they had abused a child then there would be something to report.
If the pedophile (or someone who thinks he or she might abuse a child) and they have identified a target and they are afraid of losing control and acting on those feelings then yes any therapist would be required to report. The family of the child would have to be informed about the threat and warned to be very careful especially if they knew this person.
But you can't lock somebody up for something they haven't done. You can't commit them to a psych ward for feelings or even thoughts unless they are a danger or threat to themselves or others.
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Lady Lee
purps that letter "I don't want to be a pedophile" is excellent
sooner/Mike
That is a no win situation for you. No matter what choice you made you would live with guilt your whole life and he would have made you another one of his victims.
sab
There is no way the human brain can logically justify permanently disfiguring the subconscious of an innocent child. This fact is so apparent that our western world holds pedophilia as a high crime. This is because there is a choice involved and the ones that made the wrong choice have little room to turn around. They did it to themselves so they deserve pity rather than sympathy, and possibly not even that.
Clearly they are able to justify the abuse of a child. When I confronted my father about the abuse he said "If you think I'm going to apologize you're crazy" In his mind what he did was perfectly okay and deserved no apology. I have had abusers come into my office and tell their victim and me that it was her fault and he would not accept more than 50% of the blame or that what he did wasn't so bad. To make this "choice" and yes it is a choice they have to justify it somehow and they come up with all kinds of things: I wasn't getting it from my wife, I couldn't help myself, she belongs to me and does what I twell her. . . It all boils down to "I have the power and can do whatever I want"