Help! I'm having serious thoughts about going back

by lola28 81 Replies latest jw friends

  • WTWizard

    If you go back, you will still have those problems plus additional ones:

    **You will be hounded to pious-sneer. If you are currently disassociated or disfellowshipped, you will be shunned and subjected to additional stress of facing the hounders for reinstatement. Once reinstated, you will be wasting your time in field circus.

    **You will waste money on donations, boasting session attendance, and possibly field circus. You already lost money--you will lose even more, and not gain anything back.

    **If you are disfellowshipped, you will not gain any relationships because you will be monitored during your reinstatement process. If you are merely inactive, you will still be monitored, making it very difficult to form new relationships.

    **You will have to look and act happy no matter what.

    **If you are partially disabled (especially temporarily), you will still have to do field circus. They don't give a fxxx if it means an injury that would have taken about a year to fully heal becomes permanent.

    **You will be going to boasting sessions, and expected to attend them no matter what. Especially if you have to work toward reinstatement. They will be watching for that.

    **You will once again need to make drastic changes in your life. You are not looking at Satanism, where you are accepted more or less as you are. In the witlesses, you are looking at very stressful changes. If you smoke, you need to quit regardless of the stress. You will be quitting holidays and birthdays, another stress. If you have children, you will be dragging them into the cancer and altering their lives for the worse. To the extent that you use normal words (like "luck") or mild expletives (such as "darn" or "shoot"), they will make you stop abruptly.

    **You will be required to obey stupid rules again. Dress codes, following attendants' orders, and so on. They don't care if that's the last thing you need.

    Just because you are having major problems doesn't mean you need to compound them or give yourself the other half of your problems. The half you already have is enough without adding back the other half. I would put religion on hold until your problems are fully resolved, and then do thorough research on both sides of the major religions before making a decision. And I would include, not only the big three right-hand path religions, but religions like Satanism, Paganism, physical Yoga, and the Far Eastern religions. Research them fully, and make an unbiased decision after doing so--but only after your current problems are resolved to a major extent. I would advise against returning to a religion that prohibits cross-reference--all the more so now that we are in the Age of Aquarius.

  • Spectre

    Hi Lola!

    Been a long time. Since this is page 4 I'm sure I can't add anything other than "hi".

  • criticalwitness

    there have been studies that revealed some people who were in prison for years after getting out would do something commit a crime to go back, sounds crazy but some get acustomed to the regimen the control and feel secure! when you go back some may welcome and dep on how you left df'd or whatever the scorn and shame will come so compounding your current dif you will have to go out in service relentlessly to try and prove your devotion to god? no silly to them then being reprogramed i mean what physically stopped all these so called friends from being there in youre time of need? you need friends whos friendship love and loyalty is not bound by the whims of a few men in brooklyn


    Satan is attacking you for following the truth.

  • smiddy

    Going back would be just another nail in your coffin

    sorry to put it so bluntly


  • Chariklo

    WTWizard has it absolutely right. Even my own very limited experience and observation confirm much of

    If you are partially disabled (especially temporarily), you will still have to do field circus. They don't give a fxxx if it means an injury that would have taken about a year to fully heal becomes permanent.

    Even though unbaptised, I did, and was encouraged to do, excessive amounts of field circus. It resulted in an injury which subsequently led to the accident I had a few weeks ago. Do they care? Would they? Did any of it deter them from bullyinig me on the threshold of baptism? What do you thnk?

    In every other respect WTWizard's observations are correct. Going back is a miserable option.

  • Eiben Scrood
    Eiben Scrood

    "Now, after leaving the religion, I am left with a void. A void that is going to take a lot of healing and learning and growing to fill. But I would rather be uncertain about life, the future, God and everything else than to live a lie."

    Well said and exactly how I feel. It was such a nice hope and maybe part of it is true but this organization is not, it destroys a person's spirit and sucks any kind of true joy out of a person's life.

  • Fernando

    Religion has misled us humans to look for physical signs of God's presence, favour or disfavour.

    This leads to a works-based self-righteousness, supremacist notions, and hypocrisy.

    God is however found by our human spirit when awakened by finding and following the map known as the unabridged "good news". According to this message God IMPUTES a right standing with him as a free and unmerited gift to any fallen sinner that would accept (instead of earn) his generosity.

    There is nothing that the Pharisaic and apostate WBT$ secretly hates more than the "good news". That is why it is not in the hearts or on the lips of WBT$ followers.

    It can oddly enough be found in their publications:


    *** w79 12/15 pp. 5-6 How Powerful Is The Good News? ***
    This “good news” is primarily the message that salvation or everlasting life is possible on the basis of genuine faith in the atoning benefits of Jesus Christ’s sacrifice, and that God’s kingdom by Christ will bring all things on earth into perfect unity with the holy heavens. (Acts 4:12; Rom. 1:16; Eph. 1:7-14) Why does that message have a powerful effect on those accepting it?

    Consider the situation of many individuals when the “good news” reaches them. Before hearing this message, a person may sense a certain emptiness in his life. On account of personal problems and because of witnessing injustices and oppression, he may have cried out inside himself for relief from distress. The individual may be disappointed because of his own inability to be the kind of person he would like to be. Then, when the “good news” is presented to him, he learns the basic reason for his distress, namely, that he, along with all other members of the human family, is a sinner. Therefore, no matter how sincere a person may be, he will not succeed in living his life in such a way that he does not disappoint himself and others. He can never prove himself righteous before God by adhering to a particular code of law. The “good news,” however, makes it clear how he can enjoy a clean conscience before God and men, with everlasting life in view.

    *** g79 6/8 p. 28 Why the Emphasis on Christian Freedom? ***
    A perfect code of laws cannot make any person righteous. To be divinely approved, we need a stronger force in our lives than law to override our sinful fleshly tendencies. That stronger force is God’s spirit, which operates fully toward persons who have genuine faith in God’s arrangement for salvation through Christ. To exchange Jewish legalism for Christian freedom, therefore, constitutes a denial of Christian faith.

    *** w80 5/1 p. 6 Learning from an Experiment That Failed ***
    The Mishnah states: “The rules about the Sabbath, Festal-offerings, and Sacrilege are as mountains hanging by a hair, for [teaching of] Scripture [thereon] is scanty and the rules many.”

    What was the purpose of so many rules of conduct? Some insight on this matter can be gained from a statement uttered by Jewish religious leaders before the Common Era: “Be deliberate in judgement, raise up many disciples, and make a fence around the Law.” The “fence” means traditions that supposedly would restrain persons from transgressing the written law of God. According to theory, if a person did not cross the fence, he would never be guilty of violating an actual Biblical decree.

    Did that experiment succeed? Did the massive body of oral traditions make better people out of the Israelites and the Pharisees in particular?

    Seeking God’s Favor Through Deeds

    Excessive attention to minute regulations had a harmful effect. It led to the belief that becoming righteous in God’s eyes was merely a matter of carrying out prescribed religious and charitable deeds. Each good deed was believed to earn “merit” with God, whereas every bad act would incur “debt.” Supposedly, God would one day make a tally of the record of merits and debts to determine whether a person was righteous or wicked.

    The teaching about earning merit and favor with God by good deeds caused many Pharisees to become self-righteous and condemnatory of others.

    The real source of uncleanness in God’s eyes is man’s inherited sinfulness. (Job 14:4; Ps. 51:5; Rom. 5:12) No amount of ritual washings or other pious deeds can cleanse away defilement due to sin. Only repentance and the putting of faith in God’s arrangement for canceling sins through Jesus Christ can achieve forgiveness and salvation. (Acts 4:12)

    The Pharisees did not like that message [the gospel or "good news" of salvation, unmerited favour, and IMPUTED righteousness], since they ‘trusted in themselves that they were righteous and considered the rest as nothing.’ (Luke 18:9, 10) But theirs was merely an external, superficial piety.

    Historical facts are plentiful to show that the Pharisees’ experiment to promote righteousness by their way of observing religious precepts and performing charitable deeds was a failure. It neither influenced the majority toward godliness nor helped the Pharisees themselves to become better people. Instead, it influenced them to commit the worst crime in all history, the murder of the Son of God.

    However, the experiment was not altogether without usefulness. It set the stage for Jesus before his death to give the powerful message concerning human sinfulness and the need to seek salvation, not through works but as a free gift on the basis of repentance and faith in the sin-atoning sacrifice of Jesus Christ.

  • Aussie Oz
  • Lost my mom to cancer
  • got hit by a car
  • had a professional set back that will cost over 600k to resolve
  • Ended a three and a half year relationship
  • All of the above also hit Jehovah's Witnesses.

    You don't need a JW support group, you need a social support group of which i am sure there must be many if you search you area...yes you do need to start again, but many have done so and i hope you can too.

    all the best, go back if you must, but what you have seen cannot be careful that this does not make it worse.


  • oompa

    i was about to be adopted by FoundSheep...but i think i want to marry my friend have it figured out...and put it beautifully...glad you found that girl that so needed personal attention...and you are already filling that void

    i have a void mainly due to losing all lifelong friends and my a very good wife...finiancial security (i was going to wire you the 600k lola but western union's fees were just outta sight)

    1. mom died...unless i am missing something this phenomenon has happened to every person in human histlory...and you should have been fully prepared for that...can you think why you were not prepared?

    2. hit by glad you did not him could be in jail or facing all kinds of legal and finiancial probs...go back and you will find out the reason it happend was: YOU WERE WHERE YOU SHOULD NOT HAVE BEEN...UNLESS MAYBE YOU WERE IN SERVICE...YOU WERE WEARING SEXY TIGHT SUGGESTIVE CLOTHING THAT DISTRACTS MALE DRIVERS YOU WHORE...AND YOU SHOULD BE MORE OBSERVANT...CAUTIOUS LIKE THE SERPENT...ETC.

    3. professional "setback" needing over 600k have way more money than most i know if that is a "setback" and to call it that means you will be FINE!!! i LOVE that attitude!!! and likely you will resolve it for way less than that is a blessing as that is money you can no longer donate or will to wt

    4. ended a long relationship?...well good for you...usually better than the pain and hurt of having them end one on show guts and brains...not sure how organs fit into this one


    try chumbawamba...Tubthumping

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