Help! I'm having serious thoughts about going back

by lola28 81 Replies latest jw friends

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  clarity

  Lola ... hello

  Please think about what you usually do when things go wrong. What is your habit?

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  Did you trust yourself?

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  Did you have confidence that YOU know yourself & your circumstances better than anyone else?

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  Or have the 'beatings' from the watchtower got you running scared (again??).

  Don't know your age but it maybe time to use your critical thinking skills and trustyour heart!!!

  You don't need permission .... to do this or to do that!

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  You have that power ... all by yourself ... grab on to that power & strength and don't let it go!

  Support is here & with caring and smart people. But whether you decide to go back or not has to be your

  decision!

  It has to be, because you are the one who will face the results in the end!

  Go back and read your thoughts at the time you left.

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  Will your results the second time be any different?

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  "I began to miss meetings alot and no one ever bothered to check up and see if everything was okay with me. I could have been dead and no one in the hall would have known"

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  So ...square your shoulders and lift up your chin, & put a smile on your face ...... come on you can handle it,

  now phone up someone you like and go out and "get in the game"! You've got a long life to live kid!

  clarity
• 

  turtleturtle

  I was watching Star Trek : First Contact

  and Captain Picard has flashbacks, can sense the collective, and is very much still part of the collective.

  Just sayin'
• 

  wasblind

  Lola

  your lookin' at the glass as bein' half empty, not good , lift your chin up

  1) you lost your mom to cancer BUT you were bless with havin' known her

  2) Got hit by a car BUT you survived

  3) lost money BUT Not your life

  4) Ended a relationship But can start anew

  Life is what you percieve it to be , let your perception be a good one

  you don't have to wait on another lifetime to find a piece of mind

  .
• 

  AGuest

  Greetings, dear Lola... and peace to you! What a horrible year for you - I am so sorry for you! But surely you know that bad as well as good things can happen to us all, everyone, including JWs. That you are out is not a "reason" for them to occur - it is, however, something that can be exploited to get you to return. Tell that voice to "hush"... and it will. Don't listen to it. And if you're not in a place... or of a mind... to listen to/hear Christ... at least listen to your own good reasoning (i.e., it's silly to think all of those things occurred because you left the WTBTS. To the contrary, they are much more likely to have occurred to scare you back... intothe fire).

  Oppose it, both the "voice"... and the urge.

  Again, peace to you ('cause my Lord know, you deserve some right about now)!

  A slave of Christ,

  SA
• 

  Billy the Ex-Bethelite

  Lola,

  Sorry to hear that your last year has been so rough.

  I have to mention that going back to the meetings isn't the same as going back in time. If you go to the meeting it won't bring back your mom, unhit you by that car, undo the financial damage, or restore the ended relationship. Going back to the KH will likely only remind you how much you've lost, how 'imperfect' you are, and how you need to slave more for WT because the end is closer than the inside of your pants. The 'welcome home' that you get at the KH will hardly last through the first song before the guilt-tripping will begin to really make this year completely miserable for you.

  Rather than looking backward to find happiness, you need to look forward. Have you tried professional counselling? Would you be interested in trying a different religion that isn't as judgmental and is more concerned about loving and helping others rather than judging and abusing?
• 

  Tomapostate

  Hi Lola, my two-pennuth

  After I left I tried going back and found that I literally could not stomoch the meetings any more! I honestly could not see how I managed in the first place.

  I understand the need for a community, but knowing what you know now you'll find that it just is not possable.

  Perhaps a different church? I don't know what your belieafs are now, but if atheist perhaps a very liberal church? Humanist group?

  All the best with whatever you decide.
• 

  Soldier77

  That "support group" you speak of will only be there conditionally. It is not a true support system. Also you keep saying that all the bad things happening to you started after you left right? So if I follow that logic, it must be Jehovah cursing you with these bad things. What a loving god is he indeed! If it was Satan, he would be loading up the good stuff so you wouldn't want to leave!

  Anyway, please do what is best for you health wise, that means mentally, physically and spiritually. Being a witness is going back into the Matrix and living a lie.
• 

  Chariklo

  Hi Lola,

  I've been offline most of the day and have just found this.

  Life goes like that sometimes, doesn't it? Everything seems to get thrown at you all in one go. it's so tempting to think that it's all because of....and here many people fill in the gap with something they feel might have caused it, and in your case it is leaving.

  On top of that, your mum has died. That's hard. I lost my mother 6 years ago, and I missed her so much, still do. Almost everyone feels a need to reproach themselves when a parent dies. It's a natural psychological process, and not a reason to go back. Nor is Jehovah punishing you for coming out. it's just life.

  Don't go back. You took a huge step in coming out, and the way now is forward, just as everyone else has said.

  I too am going to PM you. I hope you have sorted out how to open your PM's by now but I'm going to go through the process one more time in case you missed it first time round.

  1. Click on the unopened message, which will be in Bold. Almost certainly you'll get an Error message.

  2. Hit the back button to get the previous page.

  3. Refresh that page. The message will now show as un-Bold, as if read.

  4. Click on the message. lo and behold, you can now read it!

  Stay strong. You'll have support here, masses and masses. It's proved to be a very good place for me.
• 

  finally awake

  You've had a really lousy year. Don't make it worse by returning to the borg.
• 

  Diest

  On the birght side most people will never have 600k to loose.