What was your most DISTURBING event as an elder ? (Per T.O.S. no full names please). (page 3)

Magwitch

Glueman - welcome! So wonderful to have you here.

Balaamsass......

I just walked into the State Police spoke to the sex crimes guys and laid it all out for them.

I would like to do an act of obeisance to you Balaamsass

00DAD

Glueman, welcome to the forum. I look forward to your contributions!

jam

Young couple (20,s) call, their newly born baby girl (two weeks old)

needed blood. The husband newly baptized, the wife

born in. The mother-in- law (wife mother called). She was

afraid that the doctor was pressuring the couple to

accept blood. When I arrive I talk too the doctor and he

assured me the baby would die without blood. I was

31yrs at the time. I pull the husband aside and told him

this is your decision, you and your wife. The mother-in law

also called A sister that all the other sisters in the

congregation look up to. She came with bible swinging.

The baby died, and I perform the funeral. The begainning

of my anxiety disorder. She was A beautiful baby girl,

what A waste.

jam

That beauitful baby girl would be 31 yrs. old today.

jam

Balaa; They moved from NY to Olkahoma, the last

I heard they( young couple) moved back to NY.

That was over 30yrs ago. I hope they are doing well.

Most disturbing thing?
Back when I moved into a new congregation, the brothers filling me in on a sister who suffered from serious emotional issues. They were joking about here...laughing, calling her 'our problem'. The conversation then began to turn, ever so gradually, into an idea session...wondering how the police could be brought into this situation to have this sister forcibly commited. I mentioned to the body that this woman was one of Jesus little sheep...surely if she is no problem for him then she should be none for us. They all got very quiet: half of them seemed genuinely ashamed while a couple of the others gave me the 'who do you think you are?' look. I made enemies that day and it would come back to positively kick my ass a few years later.
The P.O. spoke up and said that they didn't mean anything serious by it, but that I was 'perhaps, correct'.

Another thing that was very disturbing to me, but maybe not so dramatically as above, was this: having young men (18-30) come to me to confess masturbating. In my years as elder, at least 5 or 6 of them approached me about this.
-ALL of them were good young men...nice guys. No shiftiness.
-ALL of them were nice looking guys. What I'm sure most women would consider a 'catch'.
-ALL of them were wearing themselves out bu 'reaching out'.
-ALL of them were broken men over this. Full of the most horrible type of guilt. They all were, at certain points, a mass of tears and weeping. In one case, guttural, hunched over wailing.

It was always sad to see. These men were very chaste...to a JW-style insane degree. When you cant be friends with a woman...can't kiss or even hold hands, if you aren't 'pursuing marrigae', to prohibit masturbation is a very nasty kind of edict. Mean and nasty.

I never told any of the other elders about these cases...even when some of them were suffering with repeated 'sessions'. I always told these guys that they were not obligated to tell anyone else but me...that it was between us. They'd followed the rules: they told an elder. I sometimes think that no matter what happens, and no matter how much the names of my wife and i have been drug through the JW gossip mud, those men might have some lingering respect for me.

Balaamsass

Good for You Unlearn. You have MY respect.

What was your most DISTURBING event as an elder ? (Per T.O.S. no full names please).

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