I've stopped my bible study but....

by PenelopePaige 75 Replies latest jw friends

  • PenelopePaige

    Thanks everyone for all the great responses :)

    I suppose I will just text her and let her know I no longer want the magazines. I wish I had her email address so I could write a better letter of resignation but she's never given me her email address. So I guess a text will have to do.

    Pam's girl- I know what you mean, I felt that way when I ended the bible study- RELIEF! And the sky didn't fall! I actually thought I was semi-enjoying the study but felt such a relief when I ended it.

    Clarity- thanks for your idea too :)

  • tec

    I felt awful when I ended my study. (especially since just the study before that, I had said I wanted to become a witness and get baptized) So I broke her heart, and I knew it, but I also knew that I couldn't continue for HER sake. It had to be for God, and for me, and for truth. I told her that, and of course she agreed.

    In my case, I just said I needed to stop our studies. That I needed time to study on my own, without ANY talks or interference or teaching from our study sessions. I guess I was assertive, because she packed up and left right then. She came by a couple of times with magazines and talked a bit just inside the door, but she respected my no study time, and we left it at that.

    We e-mail sometimes, though we tend not to speak about religion or faith much. A little... but neither of us challenging. I spent more quality time with her in two years, than with anyone else in my life (other than my children). I feel we both grew to care for one another. She even said she doesn't care what 'religion' I am.

    I haven't seen her, and since I lost my e-mail and all my contacts, haven't talked with her in a few months either.

    I feel more like I'm letting her down now. I haven't invested nearly as much time in her - witnessing to Christ as I understand Him- as she did trying to 'save' me.

    I think you will have to say no more study, and no more magazines, and just be done with it. You don't have to end your friendship with her. Unless she chooses to do that, herself.



  • Black Sheep
    Black Sheep

    Wait till you get the October Watchtower, then use the info on the threads discussing it in conjuction with a copies of the Works of Josephus and anything else relevent from the library, then question her until she tells you that the WT has been deceptive in writing this article. Don't you go telling her it is deceptive. She needs to have to tell you that. Just hammer her with questions that leave her with no option but to confront the issue. Very few people, if any, have done that to her before. She needs it.

    Then get her to explain to you why the deception is acceptable.

    Get tough. She has to answer your questions honestly. Make sure she knows that.

    If she uses trickery to weasel her way out of explaining anything, accuse her of it and act offended.

    You will have to control the subject at all times, and carefully check that every answer she gives you was truly an answer to the question you asked, and wasn't just another diversion. Long winded answers are usually about something slightly related without addressing the issue in your question. If she is doing this, interrupt her and restate your question without rephrasing it.

    If she gets stuck and wants to go home and look up an answer for you, she has to leave now. Do not let her start another subject. Not even the weather.

    If she gets snarky, don't worry about. She has the problem, not you.

    In the process of doing this, you might just work out how cunningly these 'nice' magazines are written. They are window dressing for a high control cult and work on the principle that a believeable lie must contain some truth.


  • OnTheWayOut

    "Put me on your magazine route if you want to start 'your time' and count a return visit. But leave the mags in the door (or in a manilla envelope with my last name on it for apartment dwellers with mail at the front door) when I don't answer. If I do answer, I said I don't want a study so I will literally use a stopwatch to abruptly end our conversation after (?)90 seconds. I am not being rude, but I read the mags and that's it. If you can't abide by that, they are available online or I can find them at the laundromat."

  • mamalove

    I dont know you PP, but in your defense, perhaps you might enjoy them because they are easy to read and once in a while they remind me of Readers Digest. Little off the wall articles that used to get my attention for more than a millisecond.

    Do you like the religious stuff they recycle? Ever find it a little embarassing to read?

  • FatFreek 2005
    FatFreek 2005

    PenelopePaige: I'm surprised that everyone is so shocked at me liking the magazines. Holy crap, should I not be reading them? They seem okay to me. I'm really shocked that everyone has an issue with me liking the magazines....

    Btw, if anyone has any advice on how to nicely and respectively end this, I would appreciate it-

    I'm sorry I got here late in your good discussion. You've already received some very good tips so let me add one more. Take 9 minutes to read the following essay. It will suggest a single question for you to ask that may take that nice lady completely off guard. It will also expose those "okay" magazines for what they really are.

    Wishing you the very best.


  • extractor

    I just need a nice, one-liner that won't offend.

    How about... "Could we study from my 'Crisis of Conscience' today?"

  • shamus100

    The study that wouldn't die.... :D :D :D

  • clarity

    Pp just might add, tonite all the witnesses are learning (for the 1,000 time)........

    "How to start bible studies" with Bible Teach Book, especially this first Saturday of the month!

    Listen to what the person is interested in, and talk about that!


    Getting people to study is very orchestrated and deliberate!

  • still thinking
    still thinking

    PP...all I can say about that is..... if you really want to waste your time like that...then by all means continue your study.

    I used to enjoy the Awake magazines too...now I can't even stomach the idea of even picking one up because I know its just full of self promotion with a bit of their interpretation of bible thrown in. Complete and utter waste of time.

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